‘But what if it’s—’
‘It’s not.’
‘Oh.’
‘C’mon.’ And he pads after me, obedient as a puppy, up the far side of the stairs, far as possible from the bundle.
The murmuring is getting louder. ‘Please be advised…’
‘Hey, Buzzkill?’ I cringe at the pre-assigned call sign.
‘It’s Toby. Okay? Just—’
‘Toby?’
‘I said, don’t look. Ignore it.’
‘Toby. She’s moving.’
‘I don’t care.’ But I look despite myself. And I don’t know what I’m expecting, her face to be caved in, insides leaking out, even though they say this fucker doesn’t work that fast. But who knows? Could be three hours or three months. They could have released the wrong fucking bug. For all I know, it could be the fucking flu and it’s all a big psych. I look long enough to see that the pink sheen pooled underneath her body is not her liquefying interior but part of a slinky dress, long enough to see that it’s not Ibis/Julia. ‘Niks to do with us.’
‘…is closed.’
‘But—’
‘Just shut the fuck up and just fucking leave it, okay!’
But it’s like the gun all over again, the misfire in his brain.
‘Toby?’
‘I’ll leave you here. I swear.’ He shuts up for at least five seconds.
‘More info?’
Then he says, sullenly, ‘Your coat is still on.’
‘Taxis are wait—’
‘Thanks.’ But as I touch the seam that deactivates the image capture, there’s a snatch of green and silver reflected in my sleeve.
‘Shit.’
‘…transport you to Junction.’
Kendra-sweet is limp and unyielding when I yank her to her feet, my arm around her waist, ignoring the gloppy strands of puke clinging to her hair and streaked down the front of the pink dress, like she’s been on a particularly heroic binge. ‘Dammit. Help me!’ But Eddie is hesitant.
‘Please be advised…’
‘What’s wrong with her arm? What if—?’
‘It’s not.’
‘…to terrorist action.’
‘But how do you know?’
‘More info?’
I pull the gun on him. Precarious, cos I’m holding up K, still unconscious and leaden against my hip. Eddie blinks at it stupidly. ‘You’re not allowed to shoot a clan mate.’
‘Try me.’
We load her up between us, though the little shit is careful not to touch her or the spillage on her dress. She gags like she’s going to kotch again, and Eddie nearly drops her. I cuff him with the back of my hand, the one that’s not holding her up, so I knock his hoodie back off his head with the muzzle of the gun. He whimpers.
At the entrance, there is a row of lumo orange infocones in a row as sharp as soldiers, effectively cordoning off the area.
‘This station is closed. Taxis are available on the concourse to transport you to Junction. Please be advised. This station is closed. More info?’
Kendra
‘Don’t.’
I try to break away, but they won’t let go. I can’t stand the proximity, the heat of their bodies is too close, too tight; it makes me feel nauseous. Until I was about three, I couldn’t handle anyone touching me, I’d scream if they tried. It’s common with premature babies, my parents said, but maybe they got it wrong, maybe it was my brother or another baby entirely. Maybe I never felt anything like this before.
They ignore me, and it’s easier to go along with them, because the stairs abruptly seem too steep, laborious, like someone overtilted the axis into an Escher painting.
The emergency exit doors start howling an alarm as we push through them and into the night. It’s drizzling. The wind is as cold as teeth. I don’t know what I’ve done with my bag. I try to look back for it over my shoulder.
One of them, the smaller one, yelps, ‘Hey! She’s going to kotch again.’
I feel vaguely insulted, but then I’m distracted by swathes of blue light strobing the side of the building. The lights seem warm. I’m drawn to them, but we go in the opposite direction instead, and then there is a car, and I am leaning with my head out the window and a hand on my back and cold air and rain stinging against my mouth and I’m getting wet, but they won’t let me back inside. And then there is shouting and we’re all bundled out and the car screeches away and we have to walk.
And then I wake up.
‘Well hello, sunshine.’
I close my eyes again as fast as I can. But it’s too late, I’ve already let in the light and, with it, sparking dazzles of pain.
‘Hey? Hell-o? Eugh. Shit, Eddie. Didn’t I tell you to clean this up?’
There is a moist dabbing at my chest and I open my eyes, to see Toby – who else would it be? – working at the front of my dress with a dishcloth. It smells distinctly of vomit. The couch I’m lying on is damp with sweat. And I would feel miserably humiliated if the pain didn’t override everything.
‘Easy, tiger,’ Toby says. ‘Take it you’re feeling better?’
I touch my face, feel a sullen welt on my jaw, where the cop got me with his baton. He would have got me again if his partner hadn’t intervened, so his second blow was only a glancing lash across the kidneys as I scrambled past him.
Toby gives me the cloth. ‘What were you doing, baby girl?’
‘Going to Rep…’ I say it again, because the first time it comes out as a malformed croak. ‘Going to Replica. For the party? I was meeting friends for a sundowner.’ Realisation hits. ‘Oh God, they must think I stood them up. Where’s my phone, I have to call…’
‘It’s almost three in the a.m., sweet.’
‘Up and about?’ An overweight man with a shaven head pokes his face into the negative space between the door and the wall. ‘Good. Okay. Then you need to get out.’
‘Would you just chill, Unathi?’
‘Oh no. No, no, no, no, no. You said till she’s conscious. And now she is. You have to vamos. Andelay.’
‘I want to go home,’ someone whines, and I notice, now that I’m able to focus, that the sshhssshhs sound in the background is a kid with bad posture and a worse haircut, ensconced in the depths of a beanbag, rubbing his palms down his corduroy thighs, over and over.
‘At least let me upload my video,’ says Toby.
‘Forget it, china. They’re not tracing that shit back to me.’
‘Can I use your bathroom?’ I sway slightly when I stand up, or rather the world does, taking an unnerving dip that forces me to blink, hard, to get it to realign. The lights are way too bright, flattening out everything into planes of colour. Or maybe it’s just me.
‘No. No ways.’
‘I have to pee.’
‘You’ll just have to wait.’
‘Dude.’ Toby chips in, reproachful.
‘Is it through here?’
‘No, you can’t. You have to leave. Right now.’
‘Or I could pee on your rug.’
I push open the door into a dingy room overloaded with consoles and projectas playing unique content on every wall. Games, I think, and a vid chat sesh going, with dozens of little faces squawking at each other. I pick my way over empty boxes of instant tofu meals bleeding what I can only hope is miso into the carpet, and stagger into the bathroom.
There’s no lock, or at least, no key, so I shove the laundry bin against the door. I wash my face without looking at it, avoiding my eyes in the mirror. My mouth is fucking sore. The bastard split my lip, where the edge of the baton caught me.
I shrug off my dress, step into the bath and turn on the shower full blast without waiting for the temperature to adjust. The pressure is stinging and the cold comes so brutal, it snaps something in my chest, but I refuse to cry. Not here. I lean my head against my arms and let the water surge over me until it turns hot.