jump me. I mean, it's a cinch she isn't carrying any con-
cealed weapons."
That was a fact. She had changed outfits since the last
time I saw her, probably to fit in more with the exotic
garb favored by the party-loving vampires. She was
wearing what I've heard referred to as a "tank top"
which left her midsection and navel delightfully ex-
posed, and the open-sided skirt (if you can call two flaps
of cloth that) showed her legs up past her hips. If she
had a weapon with her, she had swallowed it. Either
that, or....
I dragged my thoughts back to the argument.
"The fact of the matter is that she isn't going to talk
in front of a crowd. Now, am I going to get a chance to
hear another viewpoint about what's going on, or are
we going to keep groping around for information with
Aahz's life hanging in the balance?"
My staff fell silent and exchanged glances, each wait-
ing for the other to risk the next blast.
"Well, okay," Massha agreed at last. "But watch
yourself, Hot Stuff. Remember, poison can come in
pretty bottles."
So, under the ever-watchful glares of my assistants, I
retired a few steps down the road for my first words
alone with....
"Say, what is your name, anyway?"
"Hmmm? Oh. I'm Luanna. Say, thanks for backing
me up. That's a pretty mean-looking crew you hang
around with. I had heard you had a following, but I
hadn't realized how nasty they were."
"Oh, they're okay once you get to know them. If you
worked with them on a day-to-day basis, you'd find out
that they... heck, none of us are really as dangerous or
effective as the publicity hype cuts us out to be."
I was suddenly aware of her eyes on me. Her expres-
sion was strange ... sort of a bitter half-smile.
"I've always heard that really powerful people tended
to understate what they can do, that they don't have to
brag. I never really believed it until now."
I really didn't know what to say to that. I mean, my
reputation had gotten big enough that I was starting to
get used to being recognized and talked about at the
Bazaar, but what she was displaying was neither fear
nor envy. Among my own set of friends, admiration or
praise was always carefully hidden within our own
brand of rough humor or teasing. Faced with the undi-
luted form of the same thing, I was at a loss as to how to
respond.
"Ummm, what was it you wanted to talk to me
about?"
Her expression fell and she dropped her eyes.
"This is so embarrassing. Please be patient with me,
72 Robert Asprin
MYTH-ING PERSONS
73
Skeeve ... is it all right if I call you Skeeve? I haven't
had much experience with saying 'I'm sorry'... heck, I
haven't had much experience with people at all. Just
partners and pigeons. Now that I'm here, I really don't
know what to say."
"Why don't we start at the beginning?" I wanted to
ease her discomfort. "Did you really swindle the
Deveels back at the Bazaar?"
Luanna nodded slowly without raising her eyes.
"That's what we do. Matt and me. That and running,
even though I think sometimes we're better at running
than working scams. Maybe if we were better at conning
people, we wouldn't get so much practice at running."
Her words thudded at me like a padded hammer. I
had wanted very badly to hear that she was innocent and
that it had all been a mistake. I mean, she was so pretty,
so sweet, I would have bet my life that she was innocent,
yet here she was openly admitting her guilt to me.
"But why?" I managed at last. "I mean, how did you
get involved in swindling people to begin with?"
Her soft shoulders rose and fell in a helpless shrug.
"I don't know. It seemed like a good idea when Matt
first explained it to me. I was dying to get away from the
farm, but I didn't know how to do anything but farm-
work for a living... until Matt explained to me how
easy it was to get money away from people by playing
on their greed. 'Promise them something for nothing,'
he said, 'or for so little that they think they're swindling
you.' When he put it that way, it didn't seem so bad. It
was more a matter of being smart enough to trick people
who thought they were taking advantage of you."
"... by selling them magical items that weren't." I
finished for her. "Tell me, why didn't you just go into
the magic trade for real?"
Her head came up, and I caught a quick flash of fire
in her sad blue eyes.
"We didn't know any magic, so we had to fake it.
You probably can't understand that, since you're the
real McCoy. I knew that the first time I saw you at Pos-
sletum. We were going to try to fake our way into the
Court Magician spot until you showed up and flashed a
bit of real magic at the crown. Even Matt had to admit
that we were outclassed, and we kind of faded back be-
fore anyone asked us to show what we could do. I think
it was then that I...."
She broke off, giving me a startled, guilty look as if
she had been about to say something she shouldn't.
"Go on," I urged, my curiosity piqued.
"It's nothing, really," she said hastily. "Now it's
your turn. Since I've told you my story, maybe you
won't mind me asking how you got started as a magi-
cian."
That set me back a bit. Like her, I had been raised on
a farm. I had run away, though, planning to seek my
fortune as a master thief, and it was only my chance
meeting with my old teacher Garkin and eventually
Aahz that had diverted my career goals toward magic.
In hindsight, my motives were not discernibly better
than hers, but I didn't want to admit it just now. I kind
of liked the way she looked at me while laboring under
the illusion that I was someone noble and special.
"That's too long a tale to go into just now," I said
brusquely. "There are still a few more answers I'd like
from you. How come you used our place as a getaway
route f rom Deva?"
"Oh, that was Vic's idea. We teamed up with him just
before we started working our con at the Bazaar. When
it looked like the scam was starting to turn sour, he said
74 Robert Asprin MYTH-ING PERSONS 75
he knew a way-off dimension that no one would be
watching. Matt and I didn't even know it was your place
until your doorman asked if we were there to see you.
Matt was so scared about having to tangle with you that
he wanted to forget the whole thing and find another
way out, but Vic showed us the door and it looked so
easy we just went along with him."
"Of course, it never occurred to you that we'd get
stuck with the job of trying to bring you back."
"You better believe it occurred to us. I mean, we
didn't think you'd have to do it. We expected you'd be
mad at us for getting you involved and come after us