what we do know is bad. According to Vilhelm, Aahz is
being held in the most escape-proof cell they have,
92 Robert Asprin
which is the top floor of the highest tower in town. If we
try to take him from the inside, we're going to have to
fool or fight every guard on the way up and down. To
me, that means our best bet is to spring him from the
outside."
My assistants nodded vigorously, their faces as en-
thusiastic as if I had just said something startlingly
original and clever.
"Now, with my powers at low ebb. I don't think I can
levitate that far and spring the cell. Massha, do you
have anything in your jewelry collection that would
work for rope and climbing hooks?''
"N—no," she said hesitantly, which surprised me.
She usually had a complete inventory of her nasty
pretties on the tip of her tongue.
"I saw a coil of rope hangin' just inside the door,"
Guido supplied.
"I noticed it, too," I acknowledged, "but it isn't
nearly long enough. We'll just have to use up my power
getting up to the cell and figure some other way of
opening the window."
"Ummm... you don't have to do that. High
Roller," Massha said with a sigh. "I've got something
we can use."
"What's that?"
"The belt I'm wearing with all my gear hung on it.
It's a levitation belt. The controls aren't horribly reli-
able, but it should do to get us to the top of the tower."
I cocked an eyebrow at my apprentice.
"Wait a minute, Massha. Why didn't you mention
this when I asked?"
She looked away quickly.
"You didn't ask about a belt. Only about rope and
climbing hooks."
MYTH-ING PERSONS 93
"Since when do I have to ask you specific questions
... or any questions, for that matter, to get your in-
put?"
"All right," she sighed. "If you really want to know,
I was hoping we could find a way to do this without
using the belt."
"Why?"
"It embarrasses me."
"It what?"
"It embarrasses me. I look silly floating around in the
air. It's okay for skinny guys like you and Guido, but
when I try it, I look like a blimp. All I'd need is Good-
year tattooed on my side to make the picture complete."
I closed my eyes and tried to remember that I was
tired and that I shouldn't take it out on my friends. The
fact that Massha was worried about appearances while I
was trying to figure out a way to get us all out of this
alive wasn't really infuriating. It was... flattering!
That was it! She was so confident of my abilities to get
us through this crisis that she had time to think about
appearances! Of course, the possibility of betraying that
confidence set me off in another round of worrying.
Wonderful.
"You okay. Boss?"
"Hmmm? Yeah. Sure, Guido. Okay. Now Massha
floats up to the window, which leaves you and me free
to...."
"Hold it, Hot Stuff," Massha said, holding up a
hand. "I think I'd better explain a little more about this
belt. I bought it in an 'as-is' rummage sale, and the con-
trols are not all they should be."
"How so?"
"Well, the 'up' control works okay, but the 'altitude'
is shaky so you're never sure how much you can lift or
94
MYTH-ING PERSONS 95
Robert Asprin
how high it will go. The real problem, though, is the
'down' control. There's no tapering-off effect, so it's
either on or off."
I was never particularly good at technical jargon, but
flying was something I knew so I could almost follow
her.
"Let me see if I've got this right," I said. "When you
go up, you aren't sure how much power you'll have, and
when you land. ..."
"...it ain't gentle," she finished for me. "Basically,
you fall from whatever height you're at to the ground."
"I don't know much about this magic stuff," Guido
commented dryly, "but that doesn't sound so good.
Why would you use a rig like that, anyway?"
"I don't ... at least not for flying," Massha said.
"Remember, I told you I think it makes me look silly?
All I use it for is a utility belt... you know, like Bat-
man? I mean, it's kind of pretty, and it isn't easy to find
belts in my size."
"Whatever," I said, breaking into their fashion dis-
cussion. "We're going to use it tonight to get up to the
cell even if it means rigging some kind of ballast system.
Now all we need to figure out is how to open the cell
window and a getaway plan. Guido, it occurs to me that
we might pick up a few lessons on jailbreaks from your
experiences even if they were unsuccessful. I mean,
negative examples can be as instructive as positive ex-
amples. So tell me, in your opinion what went wrong in
the plans you followed in the past?"
The bodyguard's brow furrowed as it took on the
unaccustomed exercise of thought.
"I dunno, Boss. It seems that however much planning
was done, something always came up that we hadn't
figured on. If I had to hang our failures on any one
thing, I'd say it was just that... overplanning. I mean,
after weeks of lectures and practice sessions, you get a
little overconfident, so when something goes wrong
you're caught flatfooted, know what I mean?"
Nervous as we were, that got a laugh from both
Massha and me.
"Well, that's one problem we won't have to worry
about," I said. "Our planning time is always minimal,
and for this caper we're going to have to put it together
in a matter of hours."
"If you take hours, you'll never pull it off," Vilhelm
said, entering our planning room just in time to hear my
last comment.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Massha growled.
"Say, are you sure you guys are on the level?" the
vampire said, ignoring my apprentice. "It occurs to me
that I've only got your word on all this... that Vic is
still alive and all. If you're taking advantage of my good
nature to get me involved in something crooked...."
"He's alive," I assured him. "I've seen him myself
since we were here last... but you didn't answer the
question. What was that you were saying about what
would happen if we took hours to plan the jailbreak?"
The Dispatcher shrugged.
"I suppose you guys know what you're doing and I
should keep my mouth shut, but I was getting a little
worried. I mean, it's sundown already, and if you're
going to make your move before the execution, it had
better be soon."
"How do you figure that?" I frowned. "The action
isn't slated until high midnight. I had figured on waiting
a while until it was dark and things quieted down
around town a little."
"Are you kidding?" the vampire said with a start, his
eyebrows going up to his hairline. "That's when ... oh,
I get it. You're still thinking in terms of your off-