Oh, God.
When I finally stopped the stupid tears, I had to ask him. "David, why are you being so nice to me?"
"Because nobody deserves what happened to you," he said. "And it seems like you don’t have a friend in the world. I am supposed to be your Partner."
"You know what?" I said, and finally admitted it. To myself, and out loud. "Maybe I do deserve this."
"No. Look," he said, swallowing, "I’ll admit it. If it were just ridicule, the mooing I hear when you walk down the hall, some of the fat jokes-though I don’t agree with them-I might say that you did deserve that. But not abuse. Jesus Christ, Missy, as far as I’m concerned, you got raped."
"Maybe I still deserved it." He tried to interrupt again, but I wouldn’t let him. "Look, Cassie was supposed to be my friend. Have you noticed that she hasn’t said a word to me? I almost wish she would. I badly hurt someone who was supposed to be a friend."
"Why did you do it?" David asked quietly.
"That’s a good question. Now, look, it was Laura’s idea. That’s a cop-out, and I know it, because I went along with it." I sighed. "Look, part of it is that I was grossed out by her scars."
"Why?" he asked.
"I don’t know. But I was."
"Do naked bodies gross you out?"
"Frequently," I admitted.
"What about mine?" he smirked.
"Actually, you’re OK," I grinned. "Not much meat there, but it’s arranged pretty well."
Dave smirked again, then got serious. "What about yours?" he asked.
I admitted it, softly, "The biggest gross-out of all. Worse than Cassie. Far worse than Cassie. And, dammit, I admit it-that’s the other reason. I’m jealous of her."
"Why?" he asked me, curiously.
"Even with all the scars, she’s still a hell of a lot more attractive than I am. She’s got a great family. Everybody likes her. She gets boyfriends-and now she’s got Frankie. I’m fat, ugly, my parents suck, and everybody hates me. Boyfriends? Who the hell would want to go out with a cow like me?"
David took a deep breath. "Let’s assume, for the moment, that I’m actually capable of asking girls out without sounding like a stuttering fool, which I’m not." I had to giggle a little at that. "And let’s also assume that it was suggested to me that I ask you out. OK, I need to tell you that what would stop me from asking you out is not your appearance. OK? You’re not fat and ugly, not on the outside."
I thought about that. I disagreed with him, but I realized something else he had said. "I’m ugly on the inside," I said.
"You were last week," he told me.
"Yeah," I agreed. "Let’s face it, my life’s pretty ugly."
I think he was just about to ask me what I meant, when the door opened. In came Mom.
"Hello," she said. "Well, who’s this?" she grinned.
"This is David, my Program partner. I had a little trouble and he helped me out. Dave, my mother."
"Very nice to meet you," she beamed at David. Damn, she was so disgusting. Dave, clueless, just returned her greeting.
"Now, what kind of trouble did you have? Too many fat jokes?" she snorted.
"No," I said. "I was assaulted."
"Excuse me?"
"Punched," I reiterated. "Right in the crotch. Guess what? I’m not a virgin anymore, clinically anyway. That’s how hard whoever it was hit me."
"Oh, Melissa, you’re exaggerating. Some guys are just rough. Hey, some girls like it that way."
"That’s wasn’t rough, that was rape," David spoke up. She looked at him. "You can rape with a finger as well as other body parts. I saw it happened. It was awful."
"Well, look at this," Mom smirked, "you seem to have a protector. How sweet." David just glared at her.
"Anyway," I said, "it’s all over. Mr. Tilling took me out of The Program."
"Oh, no he doesn’t!" Mom said. "I’m not having my daughter be the one that can’t tough it out!"
"Tough it out?" David asked. "That’s ridiculous! Look, the way he set Missy up last week for going in the program, he set her up to be humiliated-and it’s gone too far. Nobody should have to tough it out under those conditions."
"Isn’t he cute?" Mom said, beaming at David. "Don’t worry. I’ll have a little talk with Bob Tilling." Then she disappeared.
"That is your mother?" Dave asked. I nodded. "I think I understand you a whole lot better than I did ten minutes ago." I smiled at him, just a little. "Besides the crap she was giving you, it almost seemed like she was coming on to me!"
"She was," I sighed.
"Eeeewww! Now that is gross!" he blurted out. I couldn’t help but laugh. "Look, are you going to be OK? I need to get going soon. Mom will worry."
"Yeah, I’ll be fine," I said, lying. Then I teased him. "Mama’s boy."
"Guilty," he grinned. "Hey, it’s only the two of us. We watch out for one another."
"Your Dad run off or something?" I asked.
"No, he died when I was six."
"Oh, I’m sorry," I said.
"It’s OK. It was a long time ago, and I was young. It’s Mom that was really affected. They had the romance of all time," he laughed.
"Really?" I asked.
"Really. Met when they were 9, started dating at 11, did the nasty for the first time at 13, stayed together all through high school and college, got married, worked and enjoyed each other for 10 years or so, then had me. And, six years later, Dad was gone. He was only 38. Mom was just devastated."
"Wow. I can see why. How did he die?"
"Accident. Drunk driver."
I smiled at him. "Now I know why your mother wants you to check in."
"Yeah," he smiled back. "See you tomorrow, OK?"
"OK," I sad. "David? Thanks." He just smiled, and then went out the door.
CHAPTER EIGHT DAVIDI was lost in thought as I walked home. I got in, and my Mom smiled at me. Thinking about Missy’s mother, I went over and gave mine a big hug.
"Why, thank you honey," she giggled, "what was that for?"
"Just felt like it," I said. "A lot happened today." I told her the whole story.
"Oh, jeez," Mom said. "What hell she went through."
"Yeah."
"I’m glad you were there for her," she said.
"Somebody had to be." I took a deep breath. "What’s amazing, now that I think about it, is that it was me. How out of character is that?"
"I don’t know," she said, "you’re a sympathetic person. I don’t see you able to just walk by someone that hurt."
"Maybe. I guess what’s really amazing is that I stayed with her, and then drove her home, and then stayed for a while longer. If I was just being altruistic, I would’ve taken her to the nurse, put her in the nurse’s hands, and left." I took a breath. "When I said I had to check in with you, she called me a Mama’s boy. She was joking, but I admitted it. Look, you tell me it all the time. It’s very strange. I’m used to being the protected, not the protector."
"How did that feel?"
"Strange. Nice. When I got her home, she lost it again and cried on my shoulder. Nobody’s ever done that."
"Do you like her?" Mom asked.
"I don’t know. I understand her better. I wanted to help her. Like? I don’t know. She’s been the school bitch for so long that I think ‘like’ is a stretch."
"OK, that’s fair. Promise me one thing, though, OK? If she comes to you for support again, don’t shut her out. From what you told me about her mother, you might be the only support she can look for. Especially if her mother convinces Mr. Tilling to keep her in The Program."
"Good point. OK, I can say I’ll be her program buddy. I can do that."
"Good."
Just then, the doorbell rang, I went to answer it. It was Jared and Amanda.
"Hey, guys," I said.
"Hey, David. I think we need to talk to you," Jared said. "There’s some rumors flying around."
"It’s no rumor, I saw him!" Another voice came ringing up the walk. It was Frankie. "I saw you with her! Coming out of the school, your arm was around her! You drove off in her car! What were you thinking?"