"Well, I dunno," I told her. "Actually, I do know, but I don’t know how to solve it for him. You’re just another in a long line, actually. You made quick friends with Frankie, yes?"
"Yeah. I like him."
"And that’s all you’ll ever be, friends," I said. "Now, you have a good reason-namely, me." She giggled at that. "But other girls don’t. Frankie Gutierrez is more surrounded by girls half the time than I am, which is saying something considering what my home life is like. But they’re all ‘just friends’. If Frankie had a mile an hour on his fastball for every time he heard that ‘just friends’ line, he’d throw a hundred."
"Ah. Been there, done that, you know that."
"Yeah, that’s right, you have," I realized. "So you understand Frankie’s problem."
"Yeah, but I don’t know if I have a solution for him. He just has to wait for the right girl, that’s all. All I could do was wait for the right guy." She smiled at me. I smiled back. "Now, about the other one. Ed. You were going to explain this to me."
I sighed. "I’m only going to give you the bare bones of this one. Any further details will have to come from Ed. Well, you know about the first blow he got-Marcia, the one that was dating both of us at the same time."
"Yeah," she said.
"The second one was worse. Right after Marcia, he hooked up with Annie Zipelski. We had all known Annie since sixth grade. This happened about this time freshman year. I think they had been growing attracted to each other for some time before they hooked up. So, they finally hooked up, and were going together for a few months."
"Anyhow, suffice it to say that Annie had a horrific situation in her home life. Ed found out about it after those first couple months. He moved heaven and earth to get her out of it-and get her out of it he did. He managed to pretty much save her life." I sighed. "I can’t get into more detail than that-as I said, you’ll have to ask Ed. That’s private. But what I do know is, after he put himself on the line for her, she dumped him, a month later."
"Oh, shit," Lily said.
"Yeah. Now, it was a lot more complicated than that, I know it. I don’t know everything-I do know that Ed doesn’t completely blame her, that it was a lot more complicated than just a ‘Thanks for everything, now get lost’ situation. But it devastated him. For a long time. And, since then, just the mention of the words ‘girlfriend’ or ‘love’ make him break out in hives. So he hides behind his jokes, and being, as you called it, a pussyhound. Very few people know what makes him that way. Me and Amanda, that’s about it."
"Damn, though, he’s sixteen years old!" Lily said.
"I know. Hopefully, some day, he’ll get over it. The think is, Ed’s a healer, a protector. Ed wants to save the world. I know you don’t get that from his personality at first glance, but he is. He’s the first guy to grab a wounded bird and nurse it back to health. The problem is, when they get back healthy, they fly away. And, with Annie, he realized that people sometimes do the same damn thing. So he closes himself off to all but a very few people-because he can’t stand to watch anyone else fly away. "
"Damn," Lily said. "Does Annie still live here?"
"No, she moved to Newburgh about a month after her and Ed ended."
"Damn. I like Ed. He deserves better."
I smiled at her. "In some ways, you’re like him, I’m finding out. Find a girlfriend for Frankie, worry about Ed. Save the world."
"Yeah," she smiled back. "The difference between us is that I prefer to be that way for friends. I like my men all healed up by the time they get to me."
"They’d have to be," I grinned. "Anyone lacking intestinal fortitude would wither under you. I was thinking about this-I’m very glad we met now, and not, say, two years ago. I’ve got a good strong self-image. I know what I want. I can’t say I would’ve been like that two years ago."
"Two years ago I don’t know if you would’ve recognized me," she sighed. "I wasn’t all that healthy myself. It took a long time to come to terms with who I am. Sometimes I feel I’m still working on it." Then she smiled at me. "And you help, you know. It really does help that you love me in all my guises."
"I really do," I told her. "Look, growing up the way I did-I’ve seen all different types of attraction. It’s made me come to terms with what I like. I understand that attraction is a weird and not always easily explainable thing. In my case, I know I’m attracted to girls, first and foremost. But, you know what that means to me? I like the female body. I’m sexually attracted to people who have all the requisite female parts. And that’s pretty much it. I like the basics of the female form, and don’t get turned on by a naked man at all. Where attraction goes from there has nothing to do with ‘liking girls’. It has to do with liking people. It has to do with personality traits. To me, you’re the perfect mixture. I don’t get into ‘feminine’ and ‘masculine’ and all that crap for personality traits. You’re you-a sexy, sweet, smart, funny girl who also has a will of iron and doesn’t mind getting dirty and mucking it up. I love all of it."
"Do you know how long I’ve waited for you to come into my life?" she sighed happily. " Look, I’ve been struggling for some time with the less-than-feminine side of my personality. I’m still struggling. Knowing you accept all of me is such a relief, you have no idea."
"You know what? I was going to ask you this anyway. My Mom is having a cookout tomorrow. She has this every spring, right around Opening Day. All her friends are there-and she also invites the kids from the GLBT Teen Crisis Hotline that she runs. I think there will be some people there that I’d like you to meet."
"OK, sounds interesting," she said.
"And Jared and Amanda will be there, you know them. They work on the hotline."
"They do?"
"Amanda is sort-of kind-of bi," I laughed. "Not really, but she’s had a few experiences. And the girl she’s had those experiences with, Allie Fitzpatrick, is completely bi. They’re all friends, so they volunteer together. Ed’ll be there, too, but only because he always comes to our parties."
"I’ll be there," she said. "Oh, wait a minute, the school carnival is tomorrow!"
"Yeah, we can go to both," I told her. "Mom has her cookouts early. The carnival doesn’t start until four, plenty of time. And you can wear clothes to Mom’s," I joked.
"Oh, yeah, we’ll have to go to the carnival nude, won’t we?" she laughed. "Ah well. Ought to be fun."
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE LILYAfter that interesting series of conversations, we were at my house. Mikey helped me get out of my car, and helped me to the door. We walked in, and the whole family was there.
"Oh, my God, Lily!" Mom said after taking one look at me. "What happened to you?"
"An ill-advised slide into home," I admitted ruefully.
"With the winning run," Mike added proudly. "She pitched a two-hit shutout, and scored the winning run in the bottom of the 8th. And pitched the top of the 9th like that."
"Wow, that’s so awesome!" Amber, my little sister, said.
"Yeah, awesome," I said ruefully. "Awesomely painful."
"But you gutted it out, like you always do," Dad said. "I’m proud of you."
"It really was something," Mike said.
"Well, who drove in the winning run?" I grinned at him.
Mike and I took turns, telling them all about the game, almost a pitch-by-pitch blow. Including the part where I had to clean myself, which made Mom howl. Halfway through, though, Mike leaned into me and whispered. "I’m going out to the car. Be right back." Then he got up.
"Wait a minute!" I said, and followed him into the foyer. "What’s up?"
"I’m going to go get my clothes," he said.