Now, if only I could figure out a way to stop stiffening like a board every time anyone touched me.
I guess that’s too much to ask.
Anyway, school was better than it had been. I liked Ed’s friends, every one of them. They were fun and interesting. Amanda’s one of the sweetest people I’ve ever met, and Lily is almost as funny as Ed. And Ed himself?
OK, I admit it. There were some very definite feelings developing there. I didn’t know quite what they were, but they were there. Look, yeah, I know part of Ed’s personality was that of a caretaker. A rescuer, a healer-hell, he has more of a maternal instinct than my mother. And I also won’t deny that there was a very prominent part of me that just longed to be taken care of.
But that wasn’t all. He made me laugh. We had a boatload in common, imagine that. He was easy to talk to, I found that out that morning. And, I’ll admit it-when he had his arm around me the previous night, I felt a funny little twinge in the pit of my stomach. That was not something I was used to at all!
So, I had all this going through my head when we met up at the entrance after school.
"We have no baseball practice because of the rain. Are you busy right now?" he asked.
"No," I said.
"Will your mother freak if you don’t come home?"
"Yes, but let her," I laughed. "If you keep me out long enough, she’ll be at work before I show up."
"Good enough. Come on, let’s get to my car."
"Aren’t we going to get dressed?" I asked.
"No need for that. Come on!" He was walking to his car. No need to get dressed? What the hell was he up to?
I got in the car-nude, as was he-and looked at him and giggled, "What, do you want to watch Casablanca in the nude or something?"
"Oh, I’ve got better ideas than that," he grinned. I’ll admit it, I winced. "Now, now, none of that. Remember what you said this morning? You trust me."
He was right. I did. So I smiled and said, "OK." We drove and then came to his house. I looked at him.
"Come on in," he said. "Nobody’s home, Mom and Dad don’t get home until after six."
OK, I thought. There’s nobody home, he’s taking me in, and we’re both nude. Scared? I was terrified. I did trust him, but this was scary-moreso when he took me to his bedroom.
"You look like you’ve seen a ghost," he said when we got there.
"Ed," I gulped, "I’m not sure about this. I mean, did you want to…I can’t, I mean…"
"This is not what you’re thinking. I’m not planning on doing anything to abuse your trust. OK?"
"OK," I said tentatively.
"Lie down on the bed. On your side, facing away from me." I just looked at him. "I just love how trusting you are," he joked.
I laughed, but then said, "You’re asking a lot from me."
"I know. But it will be all worth it. I promise."
"OK," I said, and did as he ask. Then I felt him curl up behind me. He wrapped his arms around my waist. We were in his bed, both nude, and spooning! How on earth did I let this happen? I wanted to jump up and run out the door. Except, for that little part of my brain that registered his arms cuddling me into him. That part of the brain kept saying, "This is nice, isn’t it?"
Then he started talking. "You know, I hope, what a penis is." I just laughed. "Mine’s behind you. It’s hard. No big surprise, considering I’m holding a naked gorgeous girl in my arms." I giggled again, but was also scared-until he kept talking. "The only reason I told you that is if you feel something bumping up your butt inadvertently, you’ll know what it is. Other than that, Ed’s penis is no longer a topic for discussion. It’s not a topic for anything. It doesn’t exist. If I wanted anything from you, I’d make you go for the dick. Grab it, lick it, suck it, fuck it, whatever. Not only am I not going to ask you to do any of the above, I expressly forbid it. Ed’s penis isn’t here. Ignore it. This is for you. The only reason I’m still naked is to make you feel more comfortable. I’m not naked because I want something from you, and I don’t care how hard my dick gets. And I don’t want you to, either."
I still didn’t know what he was up to, but I was listening with rapt attention. "Now, remember two things. One is that you need this. You don’t know it yet, but you do. The other thing to remember is that you trust me. OK?"
"OK," I whispered.
"Good. Now, you’re tense as all get-out. I need you to relax. Deep breaths. Big, deep, cleansing breaths. With every breath, you should feel your muscles get less tight. Go on, deep breaths."
I did. He kept coaxing me, "breathe," as I did. And, amazingly, it started working. "Breathe, Natalie. Relax," he kept whispering in my ear in a low voice as I did, and I felt the tension draining from me. Unbelievable. He was actually making me relax. My back hadn’t felt this wonderful in years.
Then I felt his hand creep up and touch my breast. I immediately stiffened. What was he doing?
"None of that," he whispered. "Don’t tense up. Relax. Breathe, in and out. You can do this."
Relax? With his hand on my boob? Oh, God, I couldn’t…but he made me, just by being gentle and talking all the time. "Natalie. This is for you. This feels good. This is supposed to feel good. Relax. Breathe. Let it happen. Trust me. Let it happen. Relax."
Oh, God, it was working. I kept breathing, and I felt the tension leave again. And I felt this wonderful warmth coming from where his hand was. Oh God, oh God, it felt good. And he kept whispering to me. Encouraging words, sweet words. "It’s beautiful. You’re beautiful," he said. "Does this feel good?"
"Yes," I admitted.
"Good," he said. "Breathe. Relax. Let it feel good." I did. We lie there for a few minutes as he fondled my boob. It felt wonderful. I still couldn’t believe it.
Then I felt his other hand. It was headed lower. Oh God, he was going to…I couldn’t let him do that? I hated that!
He was moving his hand slow enough for me to stop him-but he kept saying, "Breathe. Relax. Let it happen." So, I let it happen. I don’t know how, I don’t know why. But, before I knew it, his hand was on my pussy. He was gently tracing his finger up and down my pussy.
And, oh God, I liked it!
"Relax," he kept saying. "This feels good. This feels the best of all. Let it happen."
His finger lightly traced up and down my pussy. I kept breathing deeply. I didn’t have a choice at that point. I was headed straight to panting.
Then I felt his finger slip inside. I tensed, for just a minute. Then, amazingly, I didn’t.
"Relax, Natalie," he whispered. "This feels good. Don’t fight it."
"Oh God I’m not," I blurted out.
"Good," he chuckled. And then his finger was all the way in.
He slipped it in and out. And I liked it! I don’t know what happened-if it was because I had been so relaxed, or if it was Ed, or if it was that I trusted Ed, or what. But this-what I had been avoiding and dreading and running away from for three days-I let it happen. And it felt good.
Part of my brain was just… stunned. The other part of my brain, however, recognized a growing fire in the pit of my belly. Hey, I’m not stupid. I knew what was happening-intellectually. Not all my reading was for class. So I knew what was going on. It’s just that I had never felt it.
And then, the hand under me, the one that had been on my boob the whole time, slipped down-and went right for my clit.
That’s when I lost it. Looking back-considering that, not too many hours ago, I had been wondering if I was frigid-I still can’t believe what happened. I just went nuts. His hand on my clit made me gasp, and the fire in my belly built and built. And I found myself grabbing his other hand-the one with the finger up in me-and I humped myself on it. I had tilted a bit-I wasn’t quite on my side, I was half on my back, my leg draped over Ed’s-and I grabbed his hand and slammed my pussy on it, while his other hand rubbed furiously on my clit.