“Nick, for the love of God, please sit down.” I’m damn near hyperventilating sitting on the couch with my arms bouncing, resting on my legs. Lowering my head, I try to calm my erratic breathing. I wasn’t kidding when I said, Nick’s behavior is not helping me one bit.
“What the fuck is his game, Elsa? Why even bother to call you? And what the hell did he mean to say he needs to talk to you about some huge, potential mess?” Nick’s so upset he about hits the wall with his fist.
I’m staring at him like ‘how the hell should I know?’ Good Lord, it’s been five years.
“I told you all I know. Matt was in today, and most likely that is how Micah knew to call me there. Other than that, I’m as clueless as you.” I’m so in need of a drink. “It doesn’t matter, there is nothing left to say. He left me, end of story. That being said, I know differently, as well as you, but he will never know any part of that, right?” I need him to swear he will keep his mouth shut if he ever has the chance to meet Micah in person.
Nick huffs out a breath sitting down next to me pulling me into his arms. “I’m sorry El, this cannot be easy for you. I just don’t want you hurt. Not again, and definitely not by him.” He rubs my arms with his hands.
I could not agree with him more. “Yeah, well tell my heart to catch up with my brain would ya?” Ain’t that the truth. My head is light years ahead of my aching heart. With strong arms around me, I relax, letting my body slouch. The floodgates are now open, and there is little hope of them stopping anytime soon.
A sigh leaves his lips. “Wonder what he wants to tell you, though,” Nick says with little to no emotion. “He’s been out of the picture for so long. Now suddenly he wants to talk.” I can tell he’s tense when his hands slowly tighten around my body. “Well, fuck him.”
I’m sure Nick is having some insecurities when it comes to Micah. The one guy I’ve pined over for the past five years and now suddenly he turns up, and he wants to talk to me.
Wiping my eyes, I sit up to apologize. “I’m so sorry.” My words come out in a snotty mess, but I need him to realize I know this is hard for him too. Poor guy finally gets the girl and now the other half of her soul has turned up out of nowhere.
Anguish takes it toll on him. He’s obsessively rubbing his hands down his face. “Oh hell, baby, I’m hurt and confused. I don’t want this fucker to come in and steal you away from me. He lost you. He gave you up when you needed him the most. I was here for you…for years. It was my shoulder you cried on. My hands comforted you, and my words were the ones you sought solace in. I finally got you. You had finally let me in, and I’m scared as fuck I will lose you. To him. It’s always been him.” The pain in his voice matches the look on his face, and it hurts me.
His honesty is like a dagger. On one hand, I have the love of my life wanting to talk to me after all this time. On the other, my safety net, Nick, who is strong as steel, is fearful of losing the one person he’s wanted for so long. The guy has never wavered from me, all the late night crying, the panic attacks, even the days I just wanted to give up, he was there.
Voices outside our apartment indicate Liza is home, most likely with Ace. Just what I don’t need tonight. “Oh shit, I’m in no mood to meet her boyfriend.”
Realizing they are coming in, I wipe my eyes and take a few dozen calming breaths. Nick’s arms hold onto me tighter, telling me wordlessly it’s going to be okay.
“What is it with you tonight? I swear you’re acting weird.” Liza’s sounding like her usual cheerful self. Not!
I hear no response, so Nick and I exchange a strange look. Nick had met Ace a few times when I was either at work or not home yet, so it seems I’m the only one yet to meet him.
Going to stand up, I turn to see an agitated Liza stomping her feet. She takes in my appearance; I’m sure I look delightful crying like I have the past few hours.
She stops dead in her tracks. “What the hell is going on here?”
I swear she is ready to punch Nick, thinking he caused my unhappy state. I’m just too damn drained to explain, so I shake my head instead.
Nick, holding his hands up says, “Don’t ask me, ask her?”
She pins her puzzled expression on me. Praying this day away, I’m rolling my eyes when I catch the movement behind her. Shit, I damn near forget she’s not alone. I go to speak, but I’m rendered speechless as he walks in.
Now in life, you get a few surprises that render you speechless. You might even get a few that knock you on your ass. I would say right now, I got both in one giant puff of smoke.
Several things happen all at once. Not sure what came first, second or even last, but I heard mumbled words, the room started to spin out of control, and I was about to hit the floor. I swear I may have blacked out for a moment, but my hearing is crystal clear.
Liza screeches like she’s right next to my ear. “Jesus Christ, what the hell happened to her. Pip, wake the fuck up?”
The next thing I hear is Nick. “Baby, oh shit, I knew this would happen. Today was just too much. Ace, what the fuck is wrong with you? Liza what the hell is wrong with your dude, over there? He’s looking like he just seen a fucking ghost.”
“Who the hell knows? He’s been weird all day.”
Liza’s has to be rubbing my arms, I can feel her icy fingers all over me.
It’s then I hear it.
I hear him.
“Elsa.” It’s faint, but it’s there.
“What did you just say?” No mistaking Liza’s ‘what the fuck moment.’
I hear a thud followed with a long extended sigh. My head is gradually coming around, and as I try to open my eyes. I’m questioning if I really want to. Feeling Nick’s arms around me, and the cold fingers of Liza combing through my hair, it oddly comforts me. The spinning room starts to slow down, and everything is coming into focus. A frantic Nick and wild-eyed Liza are right in my face staring down at me. Leisurely my eyes drift to the person sitting on his knees before me with tears shimmering in his eyes. His expression is distant and lost and instantly, my heart crumbles to pieces. It’s him, still with the bluest eyes I’ve ever seen.
After five long years, our eyes are intently locked to one another. My breaths catch in my chest. Staring at him for an overlong moment, I choke back a sob and whisper, “Micah.”
Then…I heard two very loud gasps!
I’M QUIET AS A church mouse, still stunned I think. That mess, the one Micah was referring to? Yeah, it’s definitely a mess. Liza throws up her arms with pure resentment, and is voicing her displeasure so loudly, I’m sure everyone in our building is getting an earful. I can’t help thinking our story would make a great TV sitcom. The out of body experience I’m having right now is nothing compared to the continual shouting coming from Liza.
“I don’t understand,” she idly points out directing her tirade at Micah. “Don’t tell me to calm the hell down. Ace, how is it possible my best friend and my boyfriend are a long lost hookup? Why go by Ace? Why not Micah?” She barely stops to take a breath. “Jesus Christ, did you know I hated you? All because of what you did to her.” She then throws up hands. “I, of course, had no idea it’s actually you.”
Micah lowers his head giving it a slight shake. So many emotions flicker across his furrowed brows.
I think we all cringe, listening to her unleash her fury. She is missing the fact none of us knew, and we are all just as stunned. While her rant is never ending, the three of us are still stunned speechless. It’s Ace, (aka) Micah, getting the worst of it. All the while¸ he is trying to get her to calm down. But his eyes are directed at me, instead. Sadly, the only thing this does is infuriate her even more.
Micah’s still kneeling on the floor, at close quarters with me, nonetheless. His eyes are full of sorrow, and glistening as tears cascade down his cheeks. He admitted to us he used the name ‘Ace’ while in the Air Force. These days he rarely uses his given name. While he speaks, his ashen eyes are immersed solely with mine, trying to gauge my reactions as I sit and soak in his every word. To say I’m shocked as hell is an understatement. I shake my head in disbelief. My life would be any writer’s dream come true. I never knew how complicated or heart-shattering my life would become, but sitting here now, lost in the eyes of the one who shattered my fragile heart, I think it’s a tragic love story in the making. My thoughts, and my eyes are stuck, his amazing baby blues entrance me. I’ve never forgotten how piercing they were. How is it possible we’re here right now?