“Yeah,” Nick’s immediate growl doesn’t surprises me. “If you believe that crock of shit, good for you. Knowing you have slept with both of my friends here, just doesn’t settle well with me.”
Listening to Nick’s honesty, makes this situation sound so much worse. Why did he have to bring that up? We may not even make it to dinner. By the looks of Liza’s face, he’s got her all wound up.
“Jesus Nick,” Liza’s so shocked, she slaps his chest. “Thanks for reminding me. For fuck’s sake.”
It’s easy to see her mind’s spinning out of control with the fact I had a relationship with her boyfriend. Trust me, I’ve played it out in my mind. Knowing Micah’s been intimate with her after we’ve been together is a difficult pill to swallow. It doesn’t matter how long it’s been. I decide to speed things up, getting this night to end without bloodshed. The sooner we eat, the sooner we can call it a night.
Like I predicted it would be, this night is a train wreck in the making. Everyone has stopped talking. It is driving me insane.
“This dinner is just dandy. Exactly what we all needed, feeling the love already.” My sarcasm is evident as I butter the bread, adding the garlic heavier than I intended.
Micah laughs so hard and we all look at him like he’s lost his mind, but I can’t help join in. Of course, Liza and Nick never even smirk.
“Shit, this is classic,” Micah says with one last hefty laugh. “Come on you two. Elsa and I are chilled out. If you two were wound up any tighter, you might explode.”
Nick’s mouth gapes open in shock. “Really, fucking funny dude.”
Flicking his hand, Micah dismisses his comment. “Nothing funny man, just trying to see if this shit will work or not.” Raising his eyebrow, Micah finishes with a shrug of his shoulder.
Turning to leave the kitchen, Liza looks back over her shoulder, “I’ve lost my appetite.”
I want to yell at her that is was her idea to begin with.
I’m annoyed with everyone, Micah and Nick are glaring at one another in some sort of standoff. I’m trying to keep my composure and not flip out, so I bite my lip so hard, it’s on the verge of bleeding. I want to get their attention, so I drop my knife rather loudly. My ploy worked perfectly. All sets of eyes snapped my way.
“Sit the hell down,” I sharply say through my teeth. “Everyone is going to eat an incredible meal, and you are all going to love it. We will have regular conversations like we are long lost friends and act like civilized human beings. Suck it up, I have. If anyone is to feel blindsided here, it’s ME, but I’m cool as a cucumber, so d.e.a.l. with it.” I’m lying through my damn teeth, but I had to lie in order to survive this cluster-fuck of a night.
Continuing with my less than friendly attitude, I add. “Nick, set the table. Liza, grab the salad. Micah, just sit down and enjoy.” It seems to work because they all just nod their heads not arguing.
The four of us sitting down at the table is bordering on being as uncomfortable as a routine dental exam. Small talk proceeds, but to be honest, it’s merely just pleasantries.
“So Liza, how is work?” Nick asks.
Seriously? My mouth hangs open. He’s that uncomfortable he’s asking her about work?
The forced smile she gives in return is just as awkward.
“Good, thanks. How’s yours?”
He answers her so kindly, it’s sickening. I want to gag, but out of the corner of my eye, I can see Micah biting back a smile, and shaking his head. He’s trying to think of something to say, I’m sure of it by his expression.
“El, dinner was fantastic. I’m stuffed.” Micah replies with a rub of his stomach. Instead of leaving it at that, his eyes dance around and he’s biting his lip to contain a laugh. I fear he’s not done, yep, more is coming.
“Thank you for having me for dinner and cooking for all of us.” The kind words and sincere smile he gives me damn near melts my heart. “It’s a nice thing you did,” his happiness fades looking to Nick. “I know you have no desire to be sitting here right now, and to be honest, neither do I. It’s fucked no matter what way you look at it.”
Nick adds, “You got that right.” His remark less than subtle.
I don’t dare look anyone in the face. Instead, I stare at my barely eaten plate. My insides are in knots, my nerves are shot and to add insult to injury, Micah rubs my leg under the table. He’s sitting to my left, and the instant I feel his warm hand caress my leg, I damn near jump. The minute I make an attempt to move, he clamps his hand down forcing me to stay where I am.
No one notices my sudden movement. Liza’s busy rubbing her temples, and Nick is staring at the ceiling, cursing to himself no doubt. No one is looking at Micah or me for that matter. Thank God!
“Hey,” Micah says, leaving his hand resting on my leg. “It’s the truth. My world’s been turned upside down. We’ve all felt it, let’s not lie. Now, the question is, can we move past it all?” Pausing for a minute no one says a word, so he continues. “You three have been friends for a long time, and the last thing I want to do is ruin it. If I need to be the one who needs to leave, I will.”
“Now that is an idea.” Nick says, smacking his hand on the table.
“What are you saying, Ace?” Liza appears to be taken back.
A loud moan escapes Nick’s throat. “Can we all just call him by his name? It's stupid he’s going by Ace anyway.” The way he says ‘Ace’ is distasteful. I’m sure he did it to get a rise out of Micah.
“What do you mean stupid? What do you have to do with it?” Micah snapped back like I knew he would.
“Shit,” Liza said but her eyes linger on him wondering if he’ll answer the question.
He doesn’t get a chance to answer, because Nick keeps at it.
“Just seems silly to me, man. I don’t get it.” Throwing his napkin on the table, Nick sighs questioning Micah.
“Elsa has everything to do with it, Liza.” Micah says addressing Liza, not Nick. “After I left home, and went into the Academy, I started going by Ace.”
“Why?” Her eyes are full of curiosity.
Letting go of my leg, Micah’s rubbing the back of his neck. I can tell he’s nervous and like an idiot, I want to soothe him. Placing my hand under the table, I gently take hold of his thigh. An innocent gesture meant only to offer him some comfort. The look he gives in return is soft, but as uncertainty takes hold of his baby blues, they furrow with doubt. It’s then, I feel his hand covering mine. My heart can’t help but accelerate. He intertwines his fingers delicately with mine. Our hands seek comfort in one another, giving each other strength like we always have done. This small gesture is only a fraction of what seems like a natural thing for us, well the old us anyway.
Our unspoken words speak volumes to the very strong connection we have. Our souls, sing a tune familiar only to us. My teeth indent into my lower lip and my eyes pool with tears. Will he tell her the truth why he no longer went by Micah? For her sake, I hope not. For me, I might melt hearing his reason once again.
Searching for the right words, he’s studying Liza’s questioning eyes, intently. He starts and stops a few times, pausing each time. When he does start to speak, it’s soft and sweet.
“When I left, I realized how much I missed the way I felt when El said my name.” He says with nothing but pure honesty.
Oh dear lord, he’s going to tell her the truth. Tightening my fingers in a death hold on his, I’m trying gain his attention to beg him to stop. Not to hurt her with the truth. The only problem is, my gesture could also be taken as a sign of support. That it’s okay to tell her the truth. Shit. Holding my breath, I brace myself for whatever comes out of his mouth.
“When I left, the old me stayed behind. I wanted to hear my name come from her lips. ‘Ace’ has been a replacement name to go by. I’ve spent years, remembering the way she echoed my name, knowing it was coming from the sweetest voice I’d ever heard.” He speaks so soft and utterly sweet as he bares his soul, being completely honest with her. Micah doesn’t lie, even when it would have been easier to do so. How can you not fall under his spell? Seeing him here, hearing his sweet words, having him hold my hand under the table, there are no words to explain what I’m feeling for him right now.