With our fingers laced together, I replay one of the worst years of my life. Bittersweet I guess, I lost so much in a year’s time. Then again, I got the world’s best present, Michael. He may have different parents raising him, but my baby has two parents who love him unconditionally. I don’t hold back my anger, hurt, loss or betrayal as I shed my tears, telling it to Micah. He’s living it all as I take a stroll down memory lane.
By the time I am finished, I get up and find my only picture I have of Michael. I treasure it as much as the hat, the one he wore when I held him that night. I swear I can smell him today, by now his smell is long gone, but it doesn’t stop me from remembering. Showing Micah the picture hits me so hard.
Holding it over my heart, I gaze into Micah’s glistening eyes. This moment, the moment I swore would never happen is about to happen.
With a slight shrug of my shoulder, I nervously hand it to him. “Here’s your son.” Holding my nonexistent breath, I realize how monumental this moment is.
Micah takes a few deep breaths, shaking like a leaf. As he takes his first glance, the tears come out full force. Holding his hand over his mouth, I can clearly see his shock, and a hint of dismay. Moments later, his eyes show grief and loss.
With a heavy heart, he says, “My baby…Elsa, this is our son.”
His words are etched with so much love and adoration for a baby he never knew existed until yesterday. In a whirlwind of rage and betrayal, it now gives way to sincerity and love.
Grasping my hand, he pulls me down beside him. We lay back, side by side and each stare longingly at our son’s picture. My arms are seen cuddling this tiny miracle. To make this even more amazing, we can just make out his little hand holding on tight to my ring finger…the left hand of course.
Passionately, Micah whispers to me. “See him, El? He’s holding the ring finger, the finger I’m going to use to make you mine. This is my sign, he’s holding that finger, telling you to wait for his daddy. He knew back then that you belong to me.” Not even expecting him to say this, I close my eyes and let that idea and memory take center stage in my heart. Enraptured with his declaration, I can’t help feeling euphoric.
Forever Micah, forever Michael. Both of these boys have enraptured my heart and soul forever.
I SPENT THE NEXT week in a frenzy of disarray and commotion to say the least. I try to spend as much time with Micah as we caught up on each other’s lives, and I’m amazed at most of the things he’s been up to. Shortly after coming home from the Air Force, he decided to partner up with Matt and they are now operating a successful home based security business. Business seems to be booming so they were able to hire additional help. Their father’s long line of friends and loyal customers with the McIntosh Group have been more than willing to support them and recommend the Taylor boys.
It was great up until Micah dropped a bombshell on me. It seems his plans now involve me leaving my current job to run their front office. Call me crazy, but I’m considering it. I asked him to give me a few days to think it over, though. Life with Liza has been a struggle. Eating, sleeping and working with her is not working out. Living with the daily struggle, prompted Micah to not only ask me to work with him, but to move in with him as well. If I had to bet, I’d say this worked to his advantage perfectly.
Living and working with him does solve the Liza situation entirely. On both fronts, it’s a good idea. Moving too fast? Maybe to some people, but my heart knows what it wants, it always did when it came to him. So moving too fast? I think not!
“What can I do for you, Elsa?” Sitting across from my boss, he sits smiling at me, and I’m sure he’s not ready to hear what I’m about to say. His desk is messy with charts, x-rays, and even plastic teeth. I’m going to miss this.
Even though I’m positive about leaving, I’m nervous facing my boss. “I have to give you my notice, I’m leaving Dr. Davis.” Biting my lip, my leg bounces with nervous energy. God, I hate this.
Pausing he nods his head, but looks puzzled. “I see, can I change your mind?”
Shaking my head, I truthfully answer. “No, I’m sorry. It’s not you or the office, I’m going to work for Micah.” I know he has heard all about him and what he means to me. He’s also noticed the coolness between Liza and me lately.
He eyes me, knowing there is not a thing he can do to sway my mind. “I figured as much, I don’t like it though. You’re an excellent member of this team, and you will be missed.” Sighing loudly, he adds, “I also fully understand. Thank you for all the time you’ve given this office. It will be hard to replace you. I can contact the agency to send someone over.”
I sat in disbelief. That was easier than I thought it would be. I had expected him to be upset, but he was quite the opposite. In fact, it bothered me a little. I’m not sure if I wanted him to fight a little harder to get me to stay, but I wanted something, at least. I know this is what I want, but I’m also leaving my friends and patients I’ve come to love and see on a daily basis. I’ve got to remember, it’s for me and Micah. This is a good thing. Dr. Davis gave me a big hug and an open door to come back anytime.
Climbing in my car, I dial Micah to tell him the good news.
Answering the phone, he’s as cheery as always. “Hey beautiful, what’s new with you?”
Smiling from ear to ear, his voice alone sends my heart singing.
“Well,” I teasingly say, “I’m about to make your damn day.”
He chuckles into the phone. “You already do, pretty girl, but what did you do now?”
I don’t hesitate. “Gave my notice, I’m now a week away from begging you to give me a job.” I can hear his gasp, oh yeah, I surprised him.
“Oh baby, you’ve absolutely made my day. Excellent news, now move in with me and I’ll have it all.” He says eagerly.
I disclose my secret. “I’m ready.”
“I’m sorry, did I hear you right?”
Chuckling, “Yes, Micah, you did. You were right. Living with Liza is not going well, and when I’m not with you, I miss you.”
Going five long years without him was bad enough, but now, even going without him for one night, just seems wrong. I need to be where he is.
“You miss me giving you some loving, don’t you?”
“Well, there is that…” I can’t help cracking a smile.
As if on cloud nine, he says, “Dinner, my place around seven. I have some things we need to talk over. Saw my parents today, and we had a long talk.” I don’t feel great with the seriousness in his voice, but I’m sure it was a hard conversation to have with them.
“Everything okay?” Holding my breath, I’m afraid to even ask.
“Better than okay, they are happy we are together. Believe it, or not my parents love you. They want to talk to you about…well, you know.” He pauses for a moment letting out a slight groan. “They are missing Michael as much as we do, and it hurts them.”
Sighing, I can only shake my head. “They blame me, too, you mean?”
“Not at all, baby. Now your parents are another issue.”
Oh yes, my beloved parents.
“Yeah, go figure.” I can only imagine what his parents think of mine. “See you soon, I’m leaving work now.”
“Later, pretty girl.”
SHOWERED UP GRABBING my things to head over to Micah’s place, I stop dead in my tracks when Liza walks inside the door. The tension is not getting any better between us. In fact, Liza and Nick are now best buds, and I’m on the outside. I need to get this moving thing happening sooner rather than later. For all of our sakes.
“Hey Liza, um…by the way.” I’m struggling to find the words. “I’m going to move out soon, it’s the right thing to do.” Figured might as well come right out and say it.