“No, that’s not it.” I frowned, realizing he didn’t understand what I wanted. I drew in a deep breath. “What I meant was, I don’t think we should be together anymore. I don’t think we’re compatible.”
His face twisted with a mixture of pain and anger. “Where is this coming from?” His voice was louder than before.
“Connor, it’s not you, it’s me.” I cringed at how cliché my words were. “I’m the one that’s changed, not you. And as much as I had hoped we would work out and rekindle the love that we had before the accident, I don’t think that will happen. I don’t think we want the same things in life.”
“So that’s it? You’re just going to give up so easily on us and leave me?” His words were cold and exact. “I didn’t give up on you when you were in the coma. The doctors didn’t know when you’d wake up, but I stuck around by your side through it all. My love for you never wavered.”
His words were painful to hear and I found myself drowning with guilt.
“I’m really sorry, Connor. This isn’t easy for me. If truth be told, I had been thinking about us for some time now, trying to convince myself that I could make it work between us. But after everything that had happened during the past two weeks, I realized something. You’ll never be in love with the current me. You’re in love with the me before the accident, the person who was passionate about Brady Global and had consumed herself in her work there. You two fell in love as a result of that shared passion. But, I’m not her, and even if I regain my memories, I don’t think I’ll ever be her again.”
I took off the emerald diamond necklace from around my neck and removed the engagement ring from my ring finger. “I’m so sorry, Connor,” I placed both items on the coffee table in front of us and got up from the couch. “Like I said, I’m so thankful for everything you’ve done for me. I really didn’t mean to hurt you or make you upset. I just wanted to be honest with you sooner rather than later.” I took a few more steps toward the reading room door. “I should go. I’ve already moved my things to Anna’s and—”
“You just want to be honest with me?” He spat out the words vehemently. His brows drew together in an angry frown as he clenched his jaw. He stood up from the couch and towered menacingly over me. “Do you think I’m a fucking fool?” His voice was like venom and his eyes blazed with fury.
As I shrunk back in fear and felt panic spread through my body, I wondered what he had meant by his question.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Did you think I didn’t know?”
“I…what are you talking about?”
“Stop playing dumb, Liv. I know all about Ethan.”
A chill ran down my back as I froze, paralyzed in place.
“Do you really think anything can escape my notice? I know you didn’t spend your birthday with Anna. I know you were with that fucker the entire time.”
Shock rippled through my system and a part of me wanted to ask him how he knew.
“You want to know what else I know?” A muscle twitched angrily against his clenched jaw. His narrowed eyes were stone cold and all remnants of love and warmth that had once been there were gone. “I know you went sky diving with that guy. I know you let him finger bang you last night. And I know you would have let him fuck you if he hadn’t said no.”
My mind raced with everything Connor was telling me. “H-how do you know all this? Did you have me followed?” I accused as I looked at him in disbelief.
“So you do admit that you’ve been cheating on me?” A resentful smirk appeared across his face.
“Connor, I didn’t plan on any of this to happen. I never wanted to hurt you. It just happened.” My face twisted in anguish, knowing that there was nothing I could say to make what I had done with Ethan okay.
“Nothing just happens.” He then walked to the coffee table and picked up the emerald, diamond pendant. “You want to know how I know everything you’ve done behind my back?” He dangled the pendant in front of me.
“What’s that got to do with it?” I frowned at him in confusion.
“So I wasn’t completely truthful with you about this pendant.” He looked at the pendant and then at me with a wide grin. “You see, when I had it custom-made, I also had a few extra features added to it. It has a GPS tracker as well as an audio and video transmitter.”
My mouth dropped open, and at that moment, I was more shocked than frightened. “So you watched and listened to me the entire time I’d been wearing that?” I stared at him, in utter disbelief that he had been spying on me this entire time.
But something else bothered me about this, and it was a thought I couldn’t shake off. “But why? Why did you go through this much trouble to track my every movement? I thought we loved each other. Why didn’t you trust me?” I searched his stone-cold face for answers.
“That’s not important,” he said dismissively. “What’s important is the fact that you did in fact cheat on me.”
I wasn’t sure why, but I suddenly felt a strong urge to get away from him. “You’re right, Connor. I did cheat on you, and you didn’t deserve that. While I don’t regret what I’ve done with Ethan, I do regret doing them while we were still engaged. You can choose not to believe me, but I’m telling you the truth when I say that I do feel awful about how things happened. I do feel awful that I’ve hurt you in the process. That’s why I talked to you today. I didn’t want to keep doing things behind your back. With everything that’d happened between us, and between me and Ethan, I’ve realized that our relationship isn’t working. That’s why I think we should just be friends.”
“Fuck friends! I’m not going to let you do this to me!” His voice roared like thunder, causing me to flinch. “You’re not going to leave me like she did.”
“She?” I asked softly. I felt my body tense up as I started to fear for my safety.
“Cindy. You’re not going to leave like Cindy did.” There was a crazed frenzy in Connor’s hazel eyes that I’d never seen before.
“I’m not,” I tried to reason with him. “Cindy died from cancer. This is different.”
He snorted with laughter. “She didn’t die from cancer.”
My breath caught in my lungs. “But why did you tell me that then?” A part of me was afraid to know the answer.
“She had cancer but when she went into remission, she left me and made up some bullshit reason—something about being too controlling. So to me, she died when she walked out on me and left me and Scooter behind.”
“Connor, I’m sorry.” I looked at him with pained eyes. “I didn’t know about Cindy—you know that. I really don’t want to hurt you, but…I can’t stay when the feelings aren’t there.”
I walked toward the door to leave, but he moved in front of me. He glowered at me, and his left eye twitched in anger as he narrowed his eyes at me. “Did you not fucking hear me? You’re not leaving me!”
He suddenly grabbed my wrist and yanked me closer toward him. Then a flashback hit me more violently than any of the others I’d experienced before.
Anna laughed at something I had just said. “Liv, you’ll have to tell Connor that story. Maybe that’ll sway him to having the rustic farm and outdoor themed wedding that you want instead having it at that stuffy ballroom he wants it at.”
I giggled. “Yeah, I know, right? You know, sometimes I think he’s so formal and rigid about things.” I leaned in and said in a whisper, “Do you know he almost always wears a suit? Even on the weekend when we’re working from home. He’ll have a suit on. If I didn’t have access to his closet, I swear I’d think he didn’t even own a single pair of jeans.”
Anna laughed again and then looked around. “Speaking of the devil, where did he go?”
My eyes swept the room, but Anna was right, there was no sign of him in the reception hall.
“I’ll go look for him.” I smiled as I put my drink down on one of the tables.