"Thank God," I said. "If you were, I'd be worn down to a nub by now."
"Don't get me wrong," Jesse said. "I'm fond of you. Even before the"—she motioned with her hand here, trying to think of a way to describe a rejuvenating, full-body transplant—"the change, you were intelligent and kind and funny. A good friend."
"Uh-huh," I said. "You know, Jesse, usually the 'let's be friends' speech is to prevent sex."
"I just don't want you to have illusions about what this is about."
"I was under the impression that it was about magically being transported into a body of a twenty-year-old and being so excited about it that it was imperative to have wild sex with the very first person we saw."
Jesse stared at me for a second, then burst out laughing. "Yes! That's exactly it. Although in my case, it was the second person. I have a roommate, you know."
"Yeah? How does Maggie clean up?"
"Oh my God," Jesse said. "She makes me look like a beached whale, John."
I ran my hands over her sides. "That's a mighty fine beached whale, Jesse."
"I know!" Jesse said, and suddenly sat up, straddling me. She raised her arms up and crossed them behind her head, perking up her already marvelously firm and full breasts. I felt her inner thighs radiating heat as they wrapped around my midsection. I knew that even though I didn't have an erection at that very moment, one was coming right up. "I mean, look at me," she said, unnecessarily, because I hadn't taken my eyes off her from the moment she sat up. "I look fabulous. I don't say that to be vain. It's just I never looked this good in real life. Not even close."
"I find that hard to believe," I said.
She grabbed her breasts and pointed the nipples at my face. "See these?" she said, and wiggled the left one. "In real life, this one was a cup size smaller than this one, and it was still too large. I had a permanent backache from puberty onward. And I think they were this firm for one week when I was thirteen. Maybe."
She reached down, grabbed my hands, and placed them on her perfect, flat belly. "I never had one of these, either," she said. "I always carried a little pouch down here, even before I had babies. After two kids, well, let's just say that if I had ever wanted a third, it would have had a duplex in there."
I slid my hands behind her and grabbed her ass. "What about this?" I said.
"Wide load," Jesse said, and laughed. "I was a big girl, my friend."
"Being big's not a crime," I said. "Kathy was on the larger side. I liked it just fine."
"I didn't have a problem with it at the time," she said. "Body issues are foolish. On the other hand, I wouldn't trade now." She ran her hands over her body, provocatively. "I'm all sexy!" And with that, she did a little giggle and a head flip. I laughed.
Jesse leaned forward and peered into my face. "I'm finding this cat's-eye thing incredibly fascinating," she said. "I wonder if they actually used cat DNA to make them. You know, spliced cat DNA with ours. I wouldn't mind being part cat."
"I don't think it's really cat DNA," I said. "We're not exhibiting other catlike attributes."
Jesse sat back up. "Like what?" she said.
"Well," I said, and let my hands wander up to her breasts, "for one thing, male cats have barbs on their penis."
"Get out," Jesse said.
"No, it's true," I said. "It's the barbs that stimulate the female to ovulate. Look it up. Anyway, no barbs down there. I think you'd've noticed if there were."
"That doesn't prove anything," Jesse said, and suddenly sent her back part back, and her forward part forward, to lie directly on top of me. She grinned salaciously. "It could be that we just haven't been doing it hard enough to make them pop out."
"I'm sensing a challenge," I said.
"I'm sensing something, too," she said, and wiggled.
"What are you thinking about?" Jesse asked me, later.
"I'm thinking about Kathy," I said, "and how often we'd lie around like we're doing now."
"You mean, on the carpet," Jesse said, smiling.
I bopped her gently on the head. "Not that part. Just lying around after sex, talking and enjoying each other's company. We were doing this the first time we talked about enlisting."
"Why did you bring it up?" Jesse said.
"I didn't," I said. "Kathy did. It was on my sixtieth birthday, and I was depressed about getting older. So she suggested that we sign up when the time came. I was a little surprised. We'd always been antimilitary. We protested the Subcontinential War, you know, when it wasn't exactly popular to do that."
"Lots of people protested that war," Jesse said.
"Yeah, but we really protested. Became a little bit of a joke about it in town, actually."
"So how did she rationalize signing up with the Colonial Army?"
"She said she wasn't against war or the military in a general sense, just that war and our military. She said that people have the right to defend themselves and that it was probably a nasty universe out there. And she said that beyond those noble reasons, we'd be young again to boot."
"But you wouldn't be able to enlist together," Jesse said. "Unless you were the same age."
"She was a year younger than me," I said. "And I did mention that to her—I said that if I joined the army, I'd be officially dead, we wouldn't be married anymore and who knows if we'd ever see each other again."
"What did she say?"
"She said these were technicalities. She'd find me again and drag me to the altar like she had before. And she would have, you know. She could be a bear about these things."
Jesse propped herself up on her elbow and looked at me. "I'm sorry she's not here with you, John."
I smiled. "It's all right," I said. "I just miss my wife from time to time, that's all."
"I understand," Jesse said. "I miss my husband, too."
I glanced over to her. "I thought he left you for a younger woman and then got food poisoning."
"He did and he did, and he deserved to vomit his guts out," Jesse said. "I don't miss the man, really. But I miss having a husband. It's nice to have someone you know you're supposed to be with. It's nice to be married."
"It's nice to be married," I agreed.
Jesse snuggled up to me and draped an arm over my chest. "Of course, this is nice, too. It's been a while since I've done this."
"Lie on a floor?"
It was her turn to bop me. "No. Well, yes, actually. But more specifically, lie around after sex. Or have sex, for that matter. You don't want to know how long it's been since I've had it."
"Sure I do."
"Bastard. Eight years."
"No wonder you jumped me the minute you saw me," I said.
"You got that right," Jesse said. "You happened to be very conveniently located."
"Location is everything, that's what my mother always told me."
"You had a strange mother," Jesse said. "Yo, bitch, what time is it?"
"What?" I said.
"I'm talking to the voice in my head," she said.
"Nice name you have for it," I said.
"What did you name yours?"
"Asshole."
Jesse nodded. "Sounds about right. Well, the bitch tells me it's just after 1600. We have two hours until dinner. You know what that means?"
"I don't know. I think four times is my limit, even when I'm young and superimproved."
"Calm yourself. It means we have just enough time for a nap."
"Should I grab a blanket?"
"Don't be silly. Just because I had sex on the carpet doesn't mean I want to sleep on it. You've got an extra bunk. I'm going to use it."