When Rocky walked out of the house…it was as if the world stopped turning. All birds were hushed, crickets quieted, and breezes ceased. Rocky was…I don’t know? Gorgeous? Radiant?
“Beautiful,” I whispered.
Her long hair was piled up into dark curls on the top of her head, making her look like a goddess from Olympus. From her cherry red dress that draped in the front to her golden shoes and accessories, she was like a muse—my muse. All she was missing was a lyre and a cup of ambrosia.
Longing tugged at my bones as I watched the Rossis swarm around the girls (and Daniel), snapping pictures and putting them in ridiculous poses.
“I should be there with her,” I muttered, watching Rocky laugh along with her family. “I should be the one in those pictures.”
Those five stages of grief had nothing on me. Denial, anger, bargaining, depression—the only stage I skipped was acceptance.
I should have been going to that stupid dance.
I should be with Rocky.
My mother shouldn’t be a raging alcoholic.
My father shouldn’t be marrying some woman who isn’t my mom.
Ignoring my better judgement, I reached into my pocket and pulled out the flask I had swiped from my mother’s dresser that morning. I took a swig of liquid courage and headed toward the school. I knew it was stupid, but I was Jesse Tyler after all.
***
Okay, I take that back. I was stupid. A downright unintelligible amoeba. Why did I have to follow Rocky to that dumb school? Why?
Sure, things started off well at first. We joked, we laughed, and I could almost see the look of contentment in Rocky’s eyes, and God, did her eyes look especially beautiful under the field lights. I was lost in her chocolate browns and entranced by the gold ring surrounding them. Feeling an indescribable need to remember her eyes forever, I did what any other kid my age would do; I grabbed her camera, marking the event with a selfie.
Despite the smile on my face, I’d felt a horrible tugging in my gut. We’d be separated soon enough. It would only be a matter of months until she moved away to college. She deserved it, of course. She needed to have all her dreams come true, but I didn’t want to let her go. That’s why I promised her that if we ever left town, we’d leave together…
Yeah…It sounds like romantic shit, but yet another one of my brash decisions fucked everything up.
“You had to leave her alone on the field, didn’t you? Then you had to take the blame for everything.”
Like an idiot, I made the valiant decision to steal my portrait back from the art teacher that swiped it from her. Again, it was a romantic idea, but with a horrible, horrible, result. Not only was she found loitering on the football field, but she was found with my flask! I couldn’t let her to take the fall for me. Never once and never will.
“And now you’re expelled and moving to Charleston. Perfect,” I grunted to myself. I exhaled deeply, running through the empty streets. My shoes thumped against the slick asphalt, but falling wasn’t a worry of mine. I needed to get to Rocky’s house quick. I hoped to God her parents hadn’t barricaded her inside, especially since they’d looked ready to kill me in Mr. Elliott’s office. I couldn’t really blame them.
It was my liquor.
It was my fault Rocky was outside waiting for me.
Everything was my fault—I shouldn’t have even been there in the first place!
“Forget about it, Jess. Just focus on getting to her. You need to tell her you’re leaving. It needs to come from you.”
I skidded to a stop once I reached the Rossis’ driveway. It was as if a giant force field pushed back against me, freezing each limb until I clammed up, unable to move. Mr. Rossi stood in front, trembling with rage.
“Mr. Rossi—”
“What are you doing here?” He cut me off, breathing heavily. His big belly rose and fell, betraying his staggered breaths.
“I want—need—to see Rocky.”
One step after the other, he bounded toward me, shaking his fist in the air. Surprisingly, his voice was eerily calm. “Leave. Now.”
“I need to talk to her,” I pleaded. I glanced up at her window, desperate to see her face one last time.
“Leave!” he shouted.
“But—”
Without another word, he turned toward his front door and quietly stalked away.
Surprised he didn’t pick me up and throw me toward the street. I scratched my head, staring at his retreating figure, thankful for my dumb luck. Yet I knew better than to stand out there for long. Mr. Rossi was up to something. I just didn’t know what.
Quickly, I ran toward the front lawn, listening to the grass crunch as I positioned myself under Rocky’s bedroom window.
“Rocky! Rocky! Open up!”
There was a slight rustling amid the baby blue curtains before a makeup-streaked face peered between the cloth. “Jesse! What are you doing here? If my parents see you here, they’ll kill you!”
How was I supposed to tell the one person I cared about that I may never see her again? Feeling my soul crumble, I cried out, “They’re making me leave, Rocky.”
“What?” Her face was one of fear-stricken panic. “Who?”
“My parents. My dad.” I gulped, fighting back a feeling of hysteria that pushed against my core. “That’s why he’s coming up. He actually should be here in a few hours.”
“Wait, you’re moving?” Her voice was barely a squeak.
“My mom kicked me out. I have to move to Charleston.” Saying each word out loud was like a knife being twisted inside my chest. The pain was almost unbearable.
“No!” she screeched almost angrily. “You can’t leave.”
The tears I tried so hard to fight began to fall. Luckily, it was probably too dark for her to see them roll down my cheeks, but truthfully I wouldn’t care if she did. Maybe then she’d finally see how much she really meant to me. “I’m sorry, Rocky.” I bit back another sob. “I’m also sorry for leaving you tonight. I was getting this for you. For us.”
I unfolded the portrait—the stupid picture that I risked everything for. The stupid sketch that caused me to lose it all.
“Wait, you stole it from the Art Department?” she gasped.
If this was really the last time I’d be seeing her, I really needed her to know the truth behind my feelings. Whether the universe was against us or not, I needed to take my stand. Taking one last breath, I lifted my chin and did my best to catch her beautiful eyes. “I…I needed to prove to you that I lo—”
“Rocky! Who are you talking to? Is that…Jesse Tyler! You better get out of here if you know what’s good for you.”
Ah, so there was Mr. Rossi.
A look of annoyance flashed over Rocky’s face. “Jesse, wait there! I’m going—”
There was some yelling and a bit of a scuffle that followed. Though I wanted desperately to barge into the house to make sure Rocky was okay I thought better of it, finally making my first good decision in a long time. Rocky would only be ‘okay’ if I wasn’t there. Her father was angry because of me—she was in trouble because of me.
I needed to leave, but that didn’t mean it would be forever.
“I’ll be back, Rocky.” Recalling the stupid pact I made with her that night, I added, “Remember my promise! We’ll leave together!”
Chapter 9
The edge of the paper fluttered in the wind, threatening to fly away. I tightened my grip and bit back a sob. Crying didn’t come easy for me. Even when I was constantly berated by my mother for being scum, I never shed a tear. Yet, seeing Rocky’s face crumble with defeat broke whatever emotional wall I had built around my heart.
I ran. I kept running, hoping that everything was just a nightmare. I sprinted through town ignoring the stares and the whispers of my narrow-minded neighbors and ran past the small sign separating the ‘good’ part of town from the ‘bad.’ As I neared my house I found myself wondering why I was in such a hurry. It wasn’t home—definitely not anymore. Regardless, I had nowhere else to go.