He groaned. He was dying and she was taking him down with every flick of her tongue and murmur of appreciation. Heat stabbed at him, his seed boiled in his balls and flames licked over his entire body, centered right there at her little tongue on his testicles. Holy, holy hell.
He grabbed at her hair, tried to pull her head away. “No,” he groaned, though it took everything he had to try to make her stop, so close, so close. Fuck. “Not like this, Kaelin, I want…”
She pulled back and smiled up at him, the sexiest, most seductive smile he’d ever seen. “What? You only have it in you to do this once tonight?”
Damn her.
“Yes,” he growled, and hauled her to her feet. Her lips were shiny and swollen and his body pulsed with urgent need. He kicked his pants and underwear aside, shucked his socks and then stripped her out of her bra and matching panties, sweet Jesus, a tiny hot pink lace triangle held together with a couple of satin ribbons. “Love your underwear, babe,” he muttered, tossing them aside. Her low laugh tugged at his heart.
He fell with her onto his unmade bed, the black sheets and black and gray duvet still tangled from his restless sleep the night before, and tucked her under him, hands fisted in her long hair, holding her head while he kissed her, over and over, pressed her into the mattress, rolling his hips against hers, his cock hard and thick between them. If he didn’t get inside her soon, he was going to regret not staying in her mouth, because he was starting to think if she laid a finger on him he was going to come all over her. He wanted to be inside her, and then regret crashed over him as he realized he needed a condom. He could have cried, and actually stopped kissing her to rest his forehead on hers and gasp for air, fighting for a last vestige of control.
“What?”
“Condom.”
“Oh.” She sounded like she might cry too.
“Got one. S’okay, baby. Just need…a…sec…” When he thought he’d gotten the throbbing, so close to the surface, so dangerously close, reduced just a bit, he rolled off her and off the bed. Top drawer, he scrabbled in there among a lot of accumulated junk, found them and ripped one open on his way back to the bed. She watched him with glowing eyes and parted lips, watched him sheathe his aching cock with trembling fingers.
Then he fell back onto her, covered her body with his and kissed her face, everywhere, her mouth, her cheek, her eyebrow, her temple. He inhaled the scent of her, that honeysuckle and apple scent he’d never forget after just one weekend, wanted to inhale all of her, to take her inside him and just hold her there forever.
“Kaelin. Kaelin. I need you.”
“I know. I need you too.” Her hands wandered up and down his back, pulling him close as they kissed again, as he sucked on her tongue, nipped at her lips. Heat and pressure built inside him.
He went to his knees, spread wide, found her soft center, so wet and hot, and pushed inside her in a dizzying surge. He held her waist, his hands big on her small body, as he rocked into her deeper, deeper, pleasure rolling over him in hot waves. He looked down at her lying there, so much more beautiful than she’d been at nineteen, that summer, a woman now who’d had time to learn what she wanted from life, or maybe she was just now figuring it out, and he wanted to give it to her, all of it, everything. He’d never felt like this before.
He moved over her, still rolling his hips against her in a slow surge-and-drag rhythm, took his weight on his elbows and slid his hands into her hair, pressing his face to hers, whispering her name. She held on to his shoulders and lifted into him, meeting each stroke, her soft whimpers in his ear. It was intoxicating, crazy and sexy and burning hot, as he moved in her, giving it all to her, everything he had. For the first time in his life, he wanted to say the words, wanted to tell her how he felt, but it was too soon, and he was still too afraid, still so afraid that if he said it he wouldn’t hear it in return.
But he could show her his feelings, he could tell her how good it was, how sweet she was, he could make her feel so good, and he rose back to his knees and found her clit with his thumb as tingles and pressure built inside him higher and hotter. She gasped his name, and he loved the sound of it, loved how she responded to him, loved the look on her face, dazed and shattered as she came, rippling around his cock, setting off his orgasm too, his shuddering, gasping, mind-melting orgasm. He fell over her again, buried his face in her hair, breathed her in with hard gasps, pulsed inside her in aching bursts of pleasure.
After a long time, a long languorous spell of twined limbs, open-mouthed kisses, slow caresses, they lay side by side, heads on pillows, looking at each other.
“Tell me,” she whispered, touching his mouth with her fingertips.
“I was afraid,” he said, clasping her hand and holding it, kissing her fingers. “All my life. I told you what it was like. I know I didn’t do myself any favors. I know I didn’t make it easy. But I was afraid that even if I did, even if I tried to tell them the truth, it still wouldn’t be good enough. Nobody would care.”
“Tyler.” Her soft brown eyes filled with warmth and what looked like…love. He swallowed.
“You were too good for me,” he continued. “Too nice. I was a jerk. And I kept proving it over and over again.”
“You knew how I was feeling about you.”
“I suspected. But I knew it could never happen. For so many reasons. I’m sorry, Kaelin. You have no idea how sorry I am.”
She nodded.
“When you told my parents that you’d been there that night and stood up for me and Nick…” He closed his eyes, pressed her fingers to his mouth. “I damn near had a heart attack. I was so mad at you for doing that. And then you told them about spending the night with us. Kaelin, you didn’t have to do that. Especially for me.”
“Yes. I did.”
“I was angry,” he said quietly. “I didn’t react very well. I just didn’t think you should have sacrificed yourself for a jerk like me.”
“Tyler, please. I don’t want to hear you say that one more time. You’re not a jerk. You’re not.”
“If you keep telling me enough, I might start believing it.” He smiled at her and got a smile in return. She brushed her fingers through his hair.
“Okay. I will keep telling you. But I’m also going to tell you when you are acting like a jerk.”
“Oh man.” And there it was. All his life he’d acted like a jerk to push people away and she and Nick were the only people in the world who wouldn’t let him get away with that. Somehow she’d gotten inside him, where he never let anyone get. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her against him. She snuggled into him so warmly, so perfectly, and once more they just lay like that, wrapped in comfort and bliss.
The sound of the apartment door opening and closing caught his ear. Quiet footsteps approached down the hall. Nick. The bedroom door was open and Tyler dragged open heavy eyelids and smoothed his palm over Kaelin’s butt.
Nick paused at the open door to glance in, and stopped. His eyes widened at seeing Kaelin in bed with him. He stared. Tyler started to smile, but something in Nick’s expression had his gut tightening. The moment stretched out, Nick’s eyebrows drawing down, his mouth thinning. “Sorry,” he said quietly. He reached for the door and closed it with a soft snick, leaving Tyler and Kaelin alone.
She stirred against him half asleep and made a noise.
Tyler closed his eyes, the pain he’d seen in Nick’s face like a knife twisting in his back.
Chapter Sixteen