Here are some strips of paper and bits of metal!
Watch as I transform these strips of paper and bits of metal into: (a) sex (b) food (c) clothing (d) shelter (e) transportation that allows me to acquire strips of paper and bits of money (f) intoxicants that distract me from my endless pursuit of strips of paper and bits of metal (g) leisure items that distract me from my endless pursuit of strips of paper and bits of metal (h) pointless vacations to exotic locales where I will replicate the brutish behavior that I display in my point of origin as a brief respite from my endless pursuit of strips of paper and bits of metal (i) unfair social advantages that allow my rotten children to undertake their own moronic pursuits of strips of paper and bits of metal.
Humiliate yourself for strips of paper.
Murder for the strips of paper.
Humiliate others for the strips of paper.
Worship the people who’ve accumulated such vast quantities of strips of paper that their strips of paper no longer have any physical existence and are now represented by binary notation.
Treat the vast accumulators like gods.
Free blowies for the moldering corpse of Steve Jobs!
Fawning profile pieces for Jay-Z!
The Presidency for billionaire socialite and real-estate developer Donald J. Trump!
Kill! Kill! Kill!
Work! Work! Work!
Die! Die! Die!
Go on.
Pretend this is not the most magical thing that has ever happened.
Historical arguments against Christianity tended to be delivered in tones of pearl-clutching horror, usually by subpar British intellectuals pimping their accent in America, a country where sounding like an Oxbridge twat conferred an unearned credibility.
Yes, the Crusades were horrible.
Yes, the Inquisition was awful.
Yes, they shouldn’t have burned witches in Salem.
Yes, there is an unfathomable amount of sexually abused walking wounded.
Yes, every Christian country has oriented itself around the rich and done nothing but abuse the fuck out of its poor.
But it’s not like the secular conversion of the industrialized world has alleviated any of the horror. Read the news.
Murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder, rape, murder.
Despair.
All secularism has done, really, is remove a yoke from the rich. They’d always been horrible, but at least when they still paid lip service to Christian virtues, they could be shamed into philanthropy.
Now they use market forces to slide the whole thing into feudalism.
New York University built a campus with slave labor!
In the Twenty-First Century ad!
And has suffered no rebuke!
Applications are at an all-time high!
The historical arguments against Christianity are as facile as reviews on Goodreads.com, and come down to this: Why do you organize around bad people who tell you that a Skyman wants you to be good?
To which the rejoinder is: yes, the clergy sucks, but who cares how normal people are delivered into goodness?
As for philological research.
C’mon, get real.
None of these arguments would’ve worked on Fern or the Fairy Knight.
How does one supranatural creature tell two other supranatural creatures that they shouldn’t believe in a fourth supranatural creature?
Rusticano couldn’t make that argument.
So he made a fire.
You can’t talk people out of religion.
But you can violently assault them and burn down their churches. Or spraypaint MUHAMMAD PROPHET OF BUTCHERS on their masjid.
It won’t work, you won’t disabuse people of their belief.
But anything’s better than subjecting the world to another lecture about atheism.
Chapter Twenty-One
καταδυσόμεθ᾽ εἰς Ἀΐδαο δόμους
The 2016 AD Aston Martin Vanquish made its way up Sunset Boulevard.
Dmitri Huda had the night off.
HRH was in the driver’s seat.
HRH turned left onto Silver Lake Boulevard.
A sex worker was in the passenger seat.
She looked out of the passenger-side window at the Silversun liquor store.
HRH followed Silver Lake Boulevard to the 2016 AD Aston Martin Vanquish’s final destination, which was HRH’s mid-century Los Angeles home overlooking the Silver Lake Reservoir.
HRH’s personal breaking point with Beverly Hills had come in the autumn of 2015 AD, when the media turned its attention to HRH’s cousin HRH Majed bin Abdullah bin Abdulaziz Al Saud.
HRH Majed had, allegedly, thrown a party over three days.
The party had, allegedly, spanned from September 21, 2015 AD to September 23, 2015 AD.
On September 25th, 2015 AD, three women, who’d been employed by HRH Majed to provide housekeeping services during the party, filed a civil lawsuit with the Superior Court of Los Angeles.
In the complaint, the women were anonymous. They were listed as JANE DOES 1 through 3.
On October 22nd, 2015 AD, the three JANE DOES filed an amended complaint. And this second complaint caught media attention.
In the complaint, it was alleged that over the alleged three nights of alleged drug abuse, HRH Majed bin Abdullah bin Abdulaziz Al Saud had: (1) allegedly attempted to urinate on or around JANE DOES 1 through 3 while saying, allegedly, “I want to pee pee!” (2) allegedly threatened to kill JANE DOE 1, allegedly saying, “Tomorrow I will have a party with you and you will do everything I want, otherwise I will kill you” (3) allegedly jumped on top of JANE DOE 2 while she was seated and allegedly started rubbing his body against her body in a sexual manner and then, allegedly, shouted: “I am a prince and I do what I want! You are a nobody” followed by, allegedly, “You’re not a woman! You’re nobody! I’m a prince and I’ll do what I want and nobody will do anything to me!” (4) allegedly grabbed JANE DOE 2’s arm and allegedly kicked her on the knee while maintaining his grasp, allegedly leaving nail marks on her wrist and bruise marks on her thigh (5) allegedly instructed JANE DOE 3 as follows: “You’re going to go upstairs. I’ll be up there in two minutes and you’ll do whatever I want. If not, then I’ll kill you” (6) allegedly forced JANE DOE 1 and JANE DOE 2 to watch as his penis was stroked, allegedly, by a male employee who was allegedly on his knees before HRH Majed (7) allegedly forced JANE DOE 1 to watch as a different man, by request, allegedly farted in HRH Majed’s face (8) allegedly told JANE DOE 1: “I will pay you to lick my entire body. If you make me feel good, you’ll feel good too.”