André had a penchant for biting sarcasm that he found difficult to restrain when it came to Ágost, because he himself did not understand the whole business. He had no sense of humor, without which sadism really cannot be understood, neither one’s own nor anybody else’s. How was he to understand, on a more profound level, this peculiar torment, this depression; how to submerge in it, how to talk about it with the other, if he could not ward it off himself no matter what method he used. At the same time, he saw that the process was unstoppable; no personal sacrifice would bring it to a halt. Ágost was sinking, falling, and it would take long weeks before they could pull him back again from the depths.
At such times a crude stubbornness settled in his sensitive face; utter rejection. Maybe that was his true countenance. As if he regarded everything around him, people and objects, as worthless, disgusting and contemptible. His deep-set eyes narrowed completely. André looked at him with aversion; though Ágost was no longer fleeing from him, he knew he should surrender himself to this unknown and awful danger. No, maybe he should tear it apart, bite it off. Except there was no place to begin at, because the danger had no substance. He only knew what to do with things he could consider objects. And this was the characteristic he least liked in himself. This constant desire to act. For which the other two men often laughed at him, because all three of them had to remain at a reasonable distance from their own actions. But still. With his palms, he squeezed Ágost’s knees together again. He was struggling not to do anything violent, bad, or painful, and to allow no sarcasm to creep into what he was doing. Luckily, he couldn’t say a word. And like a supplicant who not only demonstrates humility but begs for mercy, he suddenly placed his forehead on the closed knees. He was not completely alone with this movement of his; Hans was also doing his job. With his large hand, he ruffled Ágost’s hair again, grabbed it and pulled it down until it reached the bowed head of André crouching before them. Ágost did not resist, he gave in, as if to say, go ahead, do it, it makes no difference to me one way or the other what you do. And when his forehead touched the top of André’s head, Hans added his own white-haired head to the other two.
His slightly wet, gray stubble had a light scent, while André’s thick dark hair had a powerful one. They remained like this for quite some time, with involuntarily closed eyes. They were enjoying, each in his own way, their warm breathing. In this too André was the strongest, he was practically panting. His breath was permeated with the raw scent of his gums, tongue, and palate. Hans instantly joined in the panting, taking over André’s rhythm, he played with it, enlarged it, clowned with it. As if to say to Ágost, you see, this one is really like an animal, but he still loves you. And with that, putting his other arm across André’s neck, he clasped and held the three of them together.
Hans’s breath had a sweet fragrance.
They were sitting at the end of the corridor in the darkness of their closed eyes, each in his own darkness.
In the illuminated hothouse silence, nothing could be heard for a long time save the wind and the splashing rain.
The only problem with these delicacies, Janika, piped up the fat woman near the entrance, slowly and softly, as if telling herself a story while crocheting, is that they have a strong smell. That’s the problem. And you can brush your teeth all you want. Of course, I also like it, there’s no better breakfast than head cheese; you can season it with a little vinegar, still it comes back from your stomach. The doctor says that one’s mouth stinks only because of bad teeth, but I say it stinks from the stomach too. And in places with high humidity, like here for instance, you can sense everything more strongly in the air.
She looked up for a second. She saw that the young man had misunderstood her, turned away, and was already becoming red from the neck up. She didn’t wait for the blush to overtake the young man completely because she wanted to spare him her own lustfully gloating look.
I don’t know how you people over in the Gellért did things, she continued, looking at her crocheting, but here we know what to do and we stick to the rules. Our guests are pretty keen on it too, you’ll see. They notice everything, and I mean everything, and they also have something to say about everything. If they’re convinced that the water in the men’s pool is at least two degrees warmer than it should be, then it’s two degrees warmer. Another might tell you that today it was colder. Warmer or colder, I let them say whatever they want. It’s all the same to me. If they want me to, I can take the water’s temperature ten times a day. You do it for them, show it to them, because you never know who is who. Later you’ll find out, believe me; you’ll know exactly who is who. Unfortunately, that’s the way it is, Janika. I’m only telling you; don’t argue with them. Well, will you look at this, you’ll say, it’s really colder, you’re right, and that makes them happy. Or they’re happy because it’s warmer. Just make sure you do things that keep them happy. You don’t have to let them do everything they want, but most things they want to do, you can let them. You, of course, don’t know it yet, you can’t have that much experience, on account of your age, but believe me, people are similar, very similar, but they’re also very different. Sometimes we play on how similar they are, sometimes on how different, you can’t learn more than this, Janika, not even from Uncle Józsi, believe me. She stopped for a moment, and since there was no response, neither questions nor objections, not a peep, she added almost apologetically, that’s right, Janika, there are many kinds of people, no end to the variety.
She wasn’t impatient.
She waited for him to process everything properly and when she looked up she noted happily that she had managed to sidetrack the young man for quite a time. The new attendant was standing before her, all red, nervously switching from one foot to the other, almost kicking them to the side, as if he couldn’t control himself or his limbs were about to fall off. Actually, she liked him. He was a pretty nice boy. She liked his wide peasant face, his protruding cheekbones, now in tremulous motion, his milky skin, his angrily knitted brows. She pitied him a little for being so shiftless.
Motherless. That’s what popped into her mind first, and afterward she could not get rid of this conclusion.
Well, why don’t you go about your business, Janika, she added firmly. Hose down your corridor; it’s getting to be ten o’clock already. The chief won’t wash it for you, I can assure you.
But this was too much for the new attendant, more than he could bear.
He weighed things for a second, and the richly bejeweled woman could see well on his face what he was struggling with, still he could no longer restrain his irritation.
Now don’t tell me, just don’t say that my mouth stinks, he said, fuming.
I didn’t say that, Janika, I didn’t say anything about your mouth, came the woman’s dignified severe reply, now why would I say such a nasty thing. But you probably eat head cheese or garlic sausage every morning, that I’m willing to bet you anything. I can even detect the red pepper. Maybe your little bride likes it, but it offends others. And take this as an honest remark, nothing else, and I made it straight to you.
So you people will tell me what I should eat for breakfast.
I won’t tell you what to have for breakfast, sonny, but if the chief took it into his head to tell you, well, that might not be such a good thing for you.
The new attendant felt himself shuddering because he would have liked to slap the large, shiny, calm face of this woman, or to kick over her table. This rotten woman had found out not only that he had a bride but also that he ate sausages for breakfast.