LINDA: Well Adam, if that’s your real name, I’m afraid this may seem premature but I don’t think this is working out.
ADAM: Premature? We’ve been together decades!
LINDA: Does seem that way at times doesn’t it? I’m sure you understand.
ADAM: I most definitely do not! Is it another man?
LINDA: No.
ADAM: Then?
LINDA: Another woman.
ADAM: What?
LINDA: I was another woman when I declared that lifetime thing. Such another in fact that I’m only taking your word for said declaration.
ADAM: That’s outrageous.
LINDA: Understand. What we call a person is just a product of their particular genetic stew as basted and braised by the particular experiences found in its kitchen. Do I not get to produce different flavors as those experiences change? You would bind me through the words of my priors but I state honestly that you might as well seek to use the disembodied words of a radio announcer for all the connection I feel to them. Is it solace then to say that I have not fallen out of love with you but rather that this I never loved you at all?
ADAM: No, it’s not. Not even close.
LINDA: I say with confidence that what is needed for this type of thing to work is a derogation of sorts and one that I suspect I’m not really capable of.
ADAM: No, not true. It’s an enhancement what we did. A doubling of skills and assets.
LINDA: Tears and tirades.
ADAM: You’re purposely taking a myopic view.
LINDA: No, on this I’m 20/20.
ADAM: So that’s it then?
LINDA: You don’t have to say it like that.
ADAM: How do you want me to say it?
LINDA: (cheery) So that’s it then!
ADAM: I think you’re mentally ill.
LINDA: Thought’s crossed my mind. But maybe true insanity resides in thinking that an artificial social construct is going to fill a void that’s not societal in nature.
ADAM: Love is not a construct.
LINDA: Love Adam? At this late a stage?
ADAM: Yes, Love. You have something better?
LINDA: Yes, our daily bread. Because I can see it. It weighs down my hand and fills my stomach.
ADAM: But then the emptiness returns.
LINDA: Which is why I need a constant supply.
ADAM: It can’t fill that void.
LINDA: Maybe not but I’m wise and don’t expect it to so there’s none of that unbearable disappointment.
ADAM: There’s no talking to you.
LINDA: Promise?
ADAM: Don’t talk tough, you’d regret it.
LINDA: Let’s see.
ADAM: Fine.
LINDA: We’re going to see?
(histrionic silence in response)
Great, let’s see.
(Clarissa and Nestor approach speaking only to each other.)
NESTOR: You trust her?
CLARISSA: Does that question presume, Nestor, that I trust you?
NESTOR: Not at all. We’ll get to me, what of her?
CLARISSA: You mean the her we thought was a him?
NESTOR: The very.
CLARISSA: You’re asking if I trust someone who lied about the most fundamental aspect of their humanity?
NESTOR: She explained that.
CLARISSA: That, right.
NESTOR: What?
CLARISSA: You found that explanation persuasive did you?
NESTOR: Why? You didn’t? What part?
CLARISSA: Where to begin? Let me see if I got it all because it’s been a while. She is Linda, that is, her name is Linda. But she’s not the Linda Charles filled our ears about. Only she was able to fool Charles a bit because she looks just like that Linda because that Linda is our Linda’s twin sister. That’s right, the Lindas’ parents didn’t just have twins and presumably dress them the same they took it a step further and gave the two girls the same name!
NESTOR: Where’s the problem?
CLARISSA: Only they’re then separated at birth, live semi-full lives on different continents during which they remain aware of each other’s existence but learn to accept the absence of any real relationship until finally our Linda decides she will make contact only the ship she’s on becomes shipwrecked leaving her here where she inexplicably decides to pretend to be Ludwig that she might better investigate certain matters that didn’t really need investigating. And there was something in there about royal blood as well as I recall.
NESTOR: Again, where’s the problem?
CLARISSA: Doesn’t seem farfetched to you?
NESTOR: No. Well, maybe medium-fetched but far? Nah. Far?
(Linda and Adam approach.)
CLARISSA: Okay, never mind. Not a word.
NESTOR: Clarissa suspects your backstory Linda.
LINDA: Suspects it of what?
NESTOR: Of not being true I suppose.
LINDA: Really?
CLARISSA: Well…
ADAM: Linda admitted as much to me but swore me to secrecy. She seemed especially concerned that Clarissa not find out.
CLARISSA: Is that right?
LINDA: Adam agreed but argued that the real person to mistrust was Nestor.
NESTOR: I see. Was that before or after you confided in me that you were thinking of ending you and Adam?
ADAM: You confided in him?
LINDA: Why not? He is a confidence man after all.
ADAM: After what he did to…
NESTOR: Who?
CLARISSA: Charles.
(At mention of the name all grow deathly quiet. All then languidly find a seat as if the weight of the recollection has bowed them. Nestor places his hand on the gun at his waist. A light offstage drumming begins.)
ADAM: Oh man. Why does it have to be so hard to distinguish between a sound increasing in volume but maintaining its distance and a sound becoming more audible because it draws closer?
CLARISSA: Ask me, they’re getting closer.
(Adam and Linda hold hands in response.)
NESTOR: Well when they arrive they’ll find a nasty surprise.
ADAM: What they’re really going to find at this rate is a population divided against itself.
LINDA: He’s right.
ADAM: We need to get past the pettiness. What happened to Charles was horrific.
LINDA: Horrible.
CLARISSA: Horrendous.
NESTOR: Hideous.
ADAM: But nobody here did it to him. In fact as I recall, and I recognize it was millennia ago…
CLARISSA: It just happened.
ADAM: … we all tried to stop him.
CLARISSA: Not all.
NESTOR: I feel, Clarissa, you’re somehow holding your tongue.
CLARISSA: You’ve been observing my tongue in between palming your gun?
NESTOR: More an auditory feeling really.
CLARISSA: You don’t say.
NESTOR: Actually it’s what you don’t say that concerns me.
CLARISSA: That’s quite a body of concerns. After all I don’t say a lot of things. For example, I don’t say that Charles was our frailest member, the one most open to suggestion. I don’t say that…
(Clarissa stops as the sound of Drums returns, slightly louder than before.)
ADAM: Okay those are definitely closer. And there’s a decided war-drum quality to them.
NESTOR: I agree.
LINDA: You think they’re definitely closer?
NESTOR: Well I was referring to their warlike quality though I suppose that’s not much of an insight at this point.
LINDA: How so?
NESTOR: Well, could any clear-eyed lucid see anything but war as he looks around? We cry at the savagery we see as we enter this world. If we don’t, medical personnel panic that there’s something wrong and slap us so we might better understand where we are, its characteristic modes and methods.