I couldn’t. So instead I said, “I thought there were more personal feelings on both sides, but I was wrong, obviously.”
“Why obviously?”
“He could just turn off. Eject me from here without a care. He cut me off cold, like I was some kind of criminal, and he said...he said...”
That’s when the tears spilled, as I thought of his threats.
“He said that he was going to take me to some court where they would make me talk. He even had handcuffs. He was going to take me in when I didn’t even know what he was talking about, and I tried to tell him, but he wouldn’t listen. He said that they could torture me to get me to talk. Can they do that?” I swiped at my drippy eyes again.
“Yeah, they can,” she admitted solemnly. “But you have to understand that we’ve all been living in the shadow of death for most of our existence. I almost lost my mother when she was trying to save my oldest brother in a surprise attack. She wasn’t successful.”
“Oh, Cyn, I didn’t know.”
“It was long ago, and it happened around the same period of time that Ryder’s sister was killed. There’d been a series of attacks.”
“His sister died?”
“His oldest. No one talks about it, but no one has forgotten. She was well-known, much loved, the daughter of our leader.” Cynthia shook her head sadly and closed her eyes. I could see she wasn’t going to say any more on this.
“Okay. I think I understand why Ryder would react the way he did after seeing the stuff on my toe.” I still felt all confused about how I should feel about it all and how to act around him. Was I supposed to bow and scrape too? Yeah, right.
“Well, there’s much more you don’t know. Ryder almost died in an act of domestic terrorism just a few months back—the one we think Ranik orchestrated. We learned that mylunate, when superheated, becomes a deadly explosive, and we learned that because someone detonated a mylunate bomb in our outdoor community garden. It was bad. Really bad. I was on Earth, so I don’t have the details other than that people he was with died and that it was bloody. I don’t know how he survived, having seen the pictures of it.”
“That’s horrible.” I thought of Ryder in a bomb explosion and cold fingers of fear trickled down my spine. I really couldn’t blame him for his reaction to me. More and more, my understanding of their situation here was finding its way through my layers of consciousness, and the overall image forming in my mind was frightening.
“Why is Frank—Ranik—trying to kill me?”
“You took his mylunate. It would be like taking someone’s gold nugget during the Gold Rush. He likely had to lie, cheat, steal and kill to get that amount.”
I appreciated the analogies. They were helping me understand the situation better. Pulling the towel off my head, I draped it across the rock ledge to dry.
“No wonder Ryder wouldn’t let me leave. This is all making a horrible kind of sense.” I covered my face tiredly, trying to keep the facts straight. So much to think about. So much to remember.
“You tried to leave? Where were you going to go?”
“I don’t even know.” I dropped my hands with a wry smile. “These last few days have not been shining moments in my life. In any case, Ryder physically stopped me, and it pissed me off, so we fought.”
“He hit you?”
“No!” I shook my head vehemently. “Not even close. He was trying to keep me contained.” Somewhat chagrined, I stuttered, “I m-might have h-hit him, though. Kicked him, actually.”
“You gave him that fat lip?” She arched an eyebrow in surprise.
“I felt like I was fighting for my life,” I said defensively.
With a look of sharp consideration crossing her face, she took a few quick steps and peeked out of the archway. Obviously, she wanted to share something privately. “Look, there’s more to this than you know. I wouldn’t normally give you classified information, but since Ryder brought you here, it could affect you. Dangerous things are happening.”
“Danger does seem to be following me lately,” I said with a hint of exasperation.
“Yeah, well, I’ve learned that the acts of aggression are ramping up on Earth as well as here.”
“On Earth?”
“There are a half-dozen confirmed cases of women from Earth who have gone missing. There are likely many more who have not yet been confirmed, and our intelligence tells us that Brausiian soldiers were spotted on Earth and likely had something to do with it. Also...”
Tall and imposing, Ryder suddenly filled the archway with his rugged visage, and my heart involuntarily sang. He was so damn hot. My inner sex kitten was purring, seeing him there with his black hair looking messed, like he’d run his fingers through it. The urge to run my own fingers through it made my palms itch.
I frowned to see that his eye really had a broken vessel in it, and remorse grew uneasily in me.
Cynthia stopped talking abruptly; I suddenly couldn’t remember what she’d been saying, anyway. A void of silence was created, but it didn’t seem to matter. It was like I got tunnel vision and could only see Ryder’s unwavering stare.
His eyes raked over me, though his expression was impassive, so I couldn’t read what he might be thinking. A tentative mental push to see if I could sense anything from him came up blank, which wasn’t surprising. His mind was always closed to me.
“We need a moment,” he said firmly to Cynthia, though his eyes never left my face. She looked at me hesitantly, torn. I was her friend, but I had sensed Ryder outranked her. I gave a small shake of my head to indicate I didn’t want her taking a stand now. I could handle this. At least I hoped.
“I’ll just be out in the other room,” she said quietly, and she exited.
Though emotionally confused, I definitely felt the need to see Ryder again, and my eyes soaked him up. His light eyes bore into mine. I could see the puffiness of his lip, as well as a dried fleck of blood. I’d done that? For a moment I stared at the evidence, in awe of myself. I truly was a badass. Then I confused myself because I also wanted to kiss it better.
I never said I was consistent.
In the few seconds that followed Cynthia’s departure, my brain whirred with questions and doubts.
Was he sorry? Did he care? Did he want to see me? Did he still think I was working for his enemy? The small, vulnerable voice in my head whispered those questions in a bubble of fragility that felt new and wholly uncomfortable, but I allowed the new feeling to sprinkle over me, even though it felt dangerous. Sometimes you need to turn on the heat to enjoy a good meal, right? Or so I’ve heard.
“There are reports of disturbances on the outer perimeters,” Ryder said in a quiet tone. “We’ve been advised to go on alert. Our defenses are being tested systematically. We’ve sent reinforcements to the borders.”
Yeah. None of this made sense to me. I folded my arms across my chest, very aware that I was naked under the robe, and waited for more information.
“I’m going to need to visit the posts to get a clear idea of what’s going on. I’ll be gone most of the day. You’re going to need to stay here. Cynthia will stay with you.”
“All right,” I replied evenly.
His face softened as he noted my stance and looked into my eyes. He stepped closer. His hands reached for my shoulders, and I couldn’t help feeling a jolt of excitement, wondering what he was about to do, but all he did was gently flatten the lapels of the robe by my collarbones. They’d been tucked in awkwardly, and I hadn’t noticed.
“Do you need anything?”
“I don’t think so.”
“Do you need ointment for any scratches? Ice for bruising? You’ve had a rough couple of days...”