Cooper was on guard duty in the dead of night. He conducted what they called a ‘loose patrol’, which meant he would walk about thirty yards, wait silently for ten minutes listening, and then walk again. Over time, he would circle the farmhouse several times during his watch. Dranko and he had devised the system because their limited manpower meant they could not afford to have two people on duty at a time. They also thought it was a good system to make sure their untrained crew did not fall asleep. It wasn’t perfect, but it was the best that they could manage to protect those sleeping inside. Don’t let the perfect get in the way of good enough.
The air was chilly, as it often was during spring in the Northwest. Cooper made a mental note to dress warmer the next time he drew this shift. His breath frosted into the night air as he exhaled. He had come on at midnight and was due to be on guard until 4:00am, when Dranko would relieve him.
After the first hour passed quietly, he heard a high pitched whine as a bevy of motorcycles screamed down the road in front of the farmhouse, heading for some point west—back toward Portland. As they approached, Cooper tensed and made ready to let the fog horn wail as a warning to the others. The fog air horn had been one of the more clever things that Dranko had stashed away in his supplies; a neat twelve-pack of them. When Cooper asked what they were for, he was sanguine, “Poor man’s warning system. We can use them as an easy ‘all warning’ system. And, when our batteries run out on our walkie talkies, they will be our only good way to warn each other!” At the time, Cooper had laughed. But, the more he’d thought about it, he understood the wisdom behind it. The system they had developed was simple, easy to remember. This was critical when working with the untrained. One long wail meant to come running and be ready to fight. Two long blasts meant to approach cautiously, but be ready to fight, as well. Three long blasts meant to flee at all costs. As the motorcycles passed by at full-speed, he replaced the horn into his pants pocket.
Completing his second circuit, Cooper approached the front of the house. He saw someone standing on the porch, so the whisper didn’t surprise him.
“Cooper,” Julianne’s hushed voice barely reached him.
He made a wide circle with his hand, indicating she should come to him.
She ambled towards him, wrapping her arms tightly around herself, to ward off the chill. As she drew near, Cooper noticed how even in the dull light of the moon, her hair and features were striking. Her eyes glinted and found his. She looks right through me. The instant intimacy that her eyes conjured made him uneasy. He looked out towards the road to avoid them.
“What is it?” he asked, forcing gruffness into his voice.
“I need to talk to you.”
“Well, make it quick. Even whispering is dangerous if anyone is coming toward us quietly.”
“I’m not sure where to start. It’s just that…I need…” Julianne fumbled, shifting her feet, and rubbing her arms vigorously.
“Just spit it out,” Cooper commanded, his voice rising just above a whisper.
She grabbed his chin, forcing him to look into her eyes, “I need to know if you’ll ever forgive me?” Her tone was firm, almost more of a statement than a question. Her eyes burrowed into his and he had no escape. He felt like she could look into his soul and he could not stop his heart warming, the ice he wanted there so badly, melting.
“That’s a lot to ask.”
She lowered her eyes to the ground, her whisper grew softer, “I know. We were right on the problem, but very wrong on the solution. I see that now. But, I couldn’t see that…I was blinded by…”
“Passion. You were a zealot, Julianne. Zealots only see one thing clearly and it makes them miss the other things. It’s a great strength and a great weakness,” Cooper finished, now pulling her face up toward his.
“So, what does that mean? Will you forgive me?” Her eyes pleaded with his. It was an act of will for him not to blurt out “Yes!”
Instead, he shook his head, averted his eyes, and cocked his eyebrows, “I don’t know. I understand what you did. That’s for sure.”
“You do?” Julianne’s quizzed, as her face grew confused.
“Of course. I’m a zealot, too! For me it is the truth. I’m beginning to see that telling the truth about Brushfire may cost many, many more lives. I didn’t think much about it before. So, I understand what you did.”
“You do?” Julianne’s face alighted, a tiny, hopeful smile growing.
“I do. It doesn’t mean I agree with it. And, then I think about my wife Elena lying buried in the ground. I think about what Jake has had to endure since all of this. How he’s lost his childhood,” Cooper’s voice cracked on the last words. He paused before continuing, “And, then I hate you like I’ve never hated anyone.” His voice grew cold and his eyes burned into her as he spoke. “I don’t hate easy, either.”
Julianne’s face became crestfallen and her eyes glistened in the faint moonlight. Once again, she lowered them. “I understand,” she mouthed more than whispered.
Cooper grabbed her by the shoulder and pulled her towards him, their eyes locking once more, “But, the worst part is. I can’t hate you. Not for long, anyway. I don’t know why. It’s just…” Now, it was Cooper’s turn to be at a loss for words. Julianne stared at him, bewildered.
“I’m drawn to you, Julianne. I don’t want to be, but I can’t help it,” Cooper pleaded, his voice plaintive.
Julianne’s eyes searched his face as her hand fell upon his cheek, caressing it. His face turned into it, seeking a deeper grasp. She bit her lower lip, as the anticipation sparked between them.
His eyes mimicked hers, scanning her face, soaking up every detail. He felt lost in her eyes; the deep pools of brown felt like they were swallowing him. The touch of her hand on his face was electric, especially as it glided down to his neck.
His hand reached for the back of her head and pulled her toward him, fingers twining into her hair. His lips found hers and their lips grappled with each other. She found his full lower lip and pulled it into her mouth, teeth nibbling it. Cooper exhaled. He shifted and enveloped her upper lip, his tongue sliding along it lightly. Their bodies pressed against each other. Her arms wrapped around him, pulling him in tightly. He felt her breasts push into his body and the play of her fingers on his back. Rank arousal coursed through him.
The effect was dramatic. Cooper recoiled and drew away. They stood just feet apart, their arms still extended towards one another, the tips of their fingers almost touching. Cooper shook his head vigorously, “I’m sorry. I can’t.” He turned on his heels and walked briskly toward the road. What was that? His mind roiled as he turned the question over and over, without answer.
Julianne stood in the gravel driveway for several minutes, watching him walk away into the dark. Finally, she shook her head in confusion and went back inside.
Chapter Six
In the morning, Cooper did his best to avoid Julianne. Sensing his discomfort, she did the same. They ate a hurried breakfast of boiled rolled oats flavored with brown sugar and leavened with some raisins. Cooper knew Jake hated Quaker Oats, but after last night, he kept his mouth shut. He winked at him and Jake dealt a knowing smile back. The adults had coffee, but Dranko did his best to ruin it by repeating what he’d said the day before.
“Don’t forget, this’ll be gone soon. So, enjoy it.”
“Yes, we get it. Now, can you just shut up and let us enjoy it?” Cooper snarled at him.
Dranko drew back, “Well, ex-cuuussse me for telling the truth. I thought you liked that sort of thing?”