Now, the house felt like wood and glass and stone.
Now, it was just a place.
Thoughts like that kept her up most of the night, thoughts of the house and her life, of dead men and the basement. By four o’clock, it was all about Channing, and those feelings spun mostly on the things Elizabeth had done wrong.
She’d made so many mistakes.
That was the difficult truth, and it pursued her until finally, at dawn, she slept. Yet, even then she dreamed and twitched and woke with a sound in her throat so animal it frightened her.
Five days…
She felt her way to the bathroom sink, splashed water on her face.
Damn.
When the nightmare let go, she sat at the kitchen table and stared at a manila file that was old and thumbed and dangerous enough to get her fired if it was ever found in her house. She’d spent three hours with it the day before, a dozen more the week before that. She’d had it since Adrian Wall’s conviction. Except for newspaper clippings and photographs she’d taken herself, it was an exact copy of the Julia Strange murder file that was stored, now, somewhere in the district attorney’s office.
Flipping to a sheaf of photographs, she took out a picture of Adrian. He was in dress blues, younger than she was now. Handsome, she thought, with the kind of clear-eyed determination most cops lose after a few years. The next shot was of Adrian in plainclothes, then another of him on the courthouse steps. She’d taken that one before his trial and liked the way light hung on his face. He looked more the way she felt now, a little worn and a little jaded. But still handsome and straight, she thought, still the cop she’d always admired.
Elizabeth flipped through newspaper coverage and got to the autopsy photos of Julia Strange, a young woman whose murder rocked the county the way few other murders ever had. Young and elegant in life, her beauty was stripped away by bloodlessness, a crushed throat, and the morgue’s bright lights. But she’d been lovely once, and strong enough to put up a fight. Signs of it were all over the kitchen: a broken chair and an upended table, a spray of shattered dishes. Elizabeth riffled through photographs of the kitchen, but saw the same things she always saw: cabinets and tile, a playpen in the corner, photographs on the fridge.
There were the usual reports, and she knew them thoroughly. Lab work, fingerprints, DNA. She skimmed the family history: the wife’s early days as a model, Gideon’s birth, the husband’s job. They’d been a perfect family in so many ways: young and attractive, not rich, but doing okay. Interviews with family friends said she was a wonderful mother, that the husband was devoted. Only one witness statement was in the file, and Elizabeth had read that a hundred times as well. An elderly neighbor heard an altercation around three in the afternoon, but she was bedridden, infirm, and not much help beyond establishing a basic timeline.
Elizabeth was a rookie when the murder happened-a uniformed officer four months into the job-but she had discovered Julia’s body on the altar of a church seven miles from the edge of town. That it was Elizabeth’s childhood church was an uncomfortable but otherwise irrelevant fact. It was a body in a building, a crime scene like any other. Elizabeth couldn’t know the effect its discovery would have on her own life. On her parents. Her church. Elizabeth had come that day to see her mother and discovered the body of Julia Strange, instead. She’d been choked to death in the most violent manner, the body undressed, then laid out on the altar and draped to the chin in white linen. No signs of sexual trauma were found, but skin discovered beneath her fingernails contained Adrian Wall’s DNA. Further investigation discovered Adrian’s prints on one of the shattered glasses in the kitchen and on a beer can found in a roadside ditch near the church. A court-ordered medical exam discovered scratches on the back of his neck. Once the prosecutor established that Adrian knew the victim, it was a hard, fast slide to conviction. He had no alibi and no explanation. Even his own partner testified against him.
Only Elizabeth doubted his guilt, but she was barely twenty-one, and no one took her seriously. She tried to investigate on her own, but was warned off. You’re biased, she was told. Confused. But Elizabeth’s faith in Adrian went beyond anything that simple. The second time she tried speaking to the witness, she was suspended. The next time she was threatened with prosecution for obstruction. So, Elizabeth let it go. She sat in the courtroom every day and kept her eyes straight ahead when the verdict came back against him. No one understood why she cared about Adrian Wall, only that she did. No one got it or possibly could.
Even Adrian didn’t know.
She spent another thirty minutes with the file, then heard a knock on her door and made it halfway across the room before realizing she was still in her underwear. “Hang on. I’m coming.” Slipping down the narrow hall, she snatched a robe off the back of her closet door and returned to the living room as someone knocked a third time. Putting an eye to the peephole, she saw Beckett’s wife on the porch. She was cheery and plump and looking at her face in a small mirror. Elizabeth cracked the door. “Carol, hey. What are you doing here?”
Carol flashed a smile and lifted a small, blue valise. “I come with assistance.”
“I’m sorry, what?”
“My husband said you needed help with your hair?” Carol raised her voice as if it were a question.
“My hair?”
Carol pushed in and nudged the door shut with a hip. She examined the house approvingly, then turned her attention to the dark circles under Elizabeth’s eyes, the washed-out skin, and cool, quiet frustration. “He wasn’t kidding about the hair.”
Elizabeth’s hand moved unconsciously, three fingers on the jagged bangs. “Listen-”
“You didn’t ask me to come, did you?”
“Did he say that I had?”
“Look, I’m sorry. I can tell this is unexpected.”
Elizabeth sighed. Carol was a patient soul who’d never had a bad day in her life. “It’s okay.” Elizabeth smiled and nodded. “I think we both know how your husband is.”
“A bit of a control freak, God bless him.”
“You should try working with him.”
“Right, then.” Carol put the case down, her face suddenly businesslike. “So, he didn’t ask and didn’t tell you I was coming.” Hands on her hips, she did a slow look around the living room and kitchen. “Right, then.” The second time was less convincing, but she nodded regardless. “Shower for you. I’ll have a coffee while I wait, and then we can fix your hair once you’re dressed.”
“Look, there’s no need-”
“Maybe something conservative.”
“I’m sorry?”
“What?”
“You said I should put on something conservative.”
“Did I?” Carol looked appalled. “God, no. I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over me.” She fluttered a hand. “It’s the short robe and the long legs. Wait. No. I’m still not saying this right.” She took a deep breath and tried again. “You’re so pretty you’d look beautiful in anything. We’re just a little more modest at our house. Please forgive me. I honestly can’t believe I said that. I’m here in your home, unexpected…”
Elizabeth held up a hand. “It’s okay.”