Three steps in, and Dyer was already pulling her back, his hands like steel on her arm. “I want to talk to him.”
“Not a chance.”
“Francis-”
“I said that’s enough!”
He dragged her outside, cops watching, spots of red in Dyer’s cheeks. He pushed her against an oak tree, and she jerked her arm free. “This is bullshit.”
“Calm down, Detective.” Dyer used the force of his voice, the authority in his eyes. “It’s not what you think, and you’re not going to talk to him. That means I need you to step away from this arrest.” She moved right, and he moved with her. “I mean it, Liz. I’ll take you in for obstruction. I swear it.”
She pushed forward.
He placed a palm squarely on her chest. The touch was entirely inappropriate, but she saw no discomfort on his face. “I’ll cuff you,” he said. “Right in front of God and everybody. Do you want that?”
Elizabeth looked at him with new eyes. Such forcefulness was not his normal style. “I’m fine.”
“Are you sure?”
She stepped back and lifted her hands. Through the crowd, she saw Adrian in the dirt. His eyes found hers, and she felt a jolt of electricity. “Why is he in full restraints?”
“Because he’s a dangerous man.”
“Who’s under arrest for what?”
“If I tell you, will you behave?”
Resentment gathered in Elizabeth’s chest. It was an indulgent word: behave. “When have I not?”
“Just stay here. We’ll talk when this is over.”
“One question.”
He turned and held up a single finger.
“What charges?”
Dyer pointed at a red-and-white sign nailed to a blackened timber. In her lifetime, Elizabeth had seen a thousand of them just like it. It was a metal square: two words, simple.
“You’re kidding me,” she said.
“He doesn’t own the property anymore.”
Dyer walked back into the house and left Elizabeth on the periphery to watch them haul Adrian to his feet, drag him from the ruins, and stuff him in a car. She watched him go and couldn’t hide the emotion she felt. Whatever Adrian was now, he’d been a cop once, and one of the finest, not just capable but decorated, lauded. He’d suffered thirteen years behind bars for a crime she didn’t think he committed, and now, here he was, assaulted on ground he used to own.
Cuffed and stuffed.
Arrested for trespass.
Elizabeth left before Dyer could find her for a further discussion. She waited on the road, then followed a line of patrol cars to the station and watched from a distance as Adrian was manhandled from the cruiser and goose-stepped toward the secure entrance. He fought the rough treatment. The treatment got rougher. By the time he disappeared inside, he was fully off the ground: two cops holding his feet, two more at his shoulders as he struggled. Elizabeth sat in silence and stared at the door. She waited for Dyer to make an appearance, but he did not.
At the church, she decided. Because that’s how it was supposed to work. Investigate first. Then arrest.
She put the car in gear and eased away from the curb, but not before she saw the dark blue sedan parked at the edge of the secure lot. It had blackwall tires and state tags. Hamilton and Marsh, she decided.
Still in town.
Still looking for the rope to hang her.
There was a knoll that looked down on the church, and a gravel road if you knew how to find it. It bent through the trees and ended in a high glade with uninterrupted views of rolling hills and far mountains. In better times he’d gone there to be alone and think of all the good in the city. Things made sense then, the sky above and everything in its place.
But that was a long time ago.
He left the car under the canopy and moved through the grass until he could see down onto the fallen steeple and scattered cars. He knew people came to the church-the horsewoman, vagrants-so he knew someone would find the body. But it made him sick to see the police there. After so many years, the church was his special place. No one else could understand the reasons or its purpose, the void in his heart it filled so perfectly.
And the girl on the altar?
She was his, too, but not as much as the others he’d chosen, not with cops looking at her and touching her and speculating. She should be in the stillness and the dark, and he hated what was happening behind the shards of stained glass: the bright lights and jaded cops, the medical examiner going about his dull, grim business. They would never grasp the reasons she’d died or why he’d chosen her or the incentive to let her be found. She was so much more than they could ever understand, not a woman or a body or a piece of some puzzle.
In death, she was a child.
At the end, they all were.
Elizabeth went to the hospital and found that Gideon had been moved out of recovery and into a private room on the same floor. “How is that possible?”
“The cost, you mean?” The nurse was the same from earlier, a pretty redhead with brown eyes and a spray of freckles across her nose. “Your father asked for it as a charitable gesture. It’s a slow week. The hospital administrator agreed.”
“Why would he do that?”
“Have you ever argued with your father?”
Elizabeth struggled with the unexpected kindness, reminding herself that her father loved Gideon, too. “Is he here now?”
“Your father? He comes and goes.”
“How is Gideon?”
“He woke, once, but isn’t speaking. Everyone here is pretty much heartbroken for him. He’s such a tiny thing, and torn up over his mother. Everyone knows what he was planning to do with that gun, but it doesn’t matter. Half the nurses want to take him home.”
Elizabeth thanked her and tapped on Gideon’s door. There was no answer, so she went in quietly and found him asleep with tubes in his arm and under his nose. A monitor beeped with the rhythm of his heart, and he was so small beneath the sheet, the movement of his chest so barely perceived. In his whole life, the poor boy had never caught a break. Poverty. Borderline neglect. Now he was branded with this other sin. Would he forgive himself? she wondered. And if so, for what? That he’d tried to kill a man or that he’d failed?
Elizabeth stood for a long time, thinking how she might appear from beyond the open door. A stranger could misconstrue her love for the child.
Why? one might ask. He’s not even yours.
There would never be an easy answer, but were Elizabeth forced to offer reasons, they might sound like this: Because he needs me, because I’m the one who found his mother dead.
Yet, even that was not the whole truth.
Leaning closer, Elizabeth studied the narrow face and bruised eyes. He appeared eight more than fourteen, closer to dead than to living.
His eyes opened and filled with shadow. “Did I kill him?”
Elizabeth smoothed his hair and smiled. “No, sweetheart. You’re not a killer.”
She leaned closer, thinking he’d be relieved by the news. Behind the boy’s head, though, the monitor started beeping faster.
“Are you sure?”
“He’s alive. You did nothing wrong.” The monitor spiked. His eyes rolled white. “Gideon? Breathe, honey.”
The monitor began to scream. “Nurse!” Elizabeth yelled, but it was unnecessary. The door was already open, one nurse spilling in, a doctor on her heels.
The doctor asked, “What happened?”
“We were just talking…”
“What did you say to him?”
“Nothing. I don’t know. We just-”