By the time we made it downstairs, Tod and Matt were both staring at a huge, glossy white box with a red ribbon tied around it that was sitting on the ottoman. Matt was holding a can of diet pop. Tod was holding a pop in one hand with his other arm wrapped around the biggest display of long stemmed red roses I’d ever seen, at least two dozen of them.
I’d had flowers delivered before but never on this scale and never accompanied by glossy boxes. I looked to Lee but he was staring at the flowers, his face tight. Clearly, whatever this was, it was not from Lee.
“There’s a card on the box,” Tod said, he was staring at Lee too.
I grabbed the card and it read, Dinner Wednesday night. Wear the dress. Terry
I’d just finished reading it and experiencing the sick clutch in my stomach when Lee snagged the card out of my fingers.
I stared at the box as if it was ticking.
“Aren’t you gonna open it?” Tod asked.
“You open it,” I said.
Tod needed no further encouragement. He plopped the huge array of flowers in my arms, set aside his pop and dug into the box. He squealed in delight as he pulled out a fabulous little black dress.
“I saw this at Saks when I was looking for shoes. It cost one thousand seven hundred and fifty dollars!”
That sick clutch in my stomach lurched and became full-blown nausea.
Tod was happily looking at Lee, thinking it was from him and that I’d hit the mother-lode of hunky boyfriends with platinum credit cards.
The muscle in Lee’s cheek was working and his eyes cut to Tod.
“Put the dress back in the box,” Lee ordered and Tod quickly did as he was told, his face turning confused.
Lee said to Matt, “Coxy.”
Matt’s jaw went rigid and his eyes turned to me.
“I didn’t do anything!” I shouted. “He kidnapped me! I didn’t encourage him at all! He’s creepy.”
“Who’s creepy?” Tod asked.
“They guy who sent these to me. He looks like Grandpa Munster except genuinely scary.”
“You didn’t send them?” Tod turned to Lee.
Lee didn’t answer, just grabbed the box and tucked it under his arm. “I’m returning this,” he announced and he was using his scary voice.
I nodded.
“Don’t leave the house. Don’t open the door to anyone. Bobby’s following up on Rosie and after we visit Wilcox, Matt and I will run down that lead. I’ll be back as soon as I can.”
I nodded again.
“I’ll do my best to convince Coxy that you aren’t interested.”
“I’d appreciate that.”
Lee’s face was totally blank and he watched me for several seconds. Once he started speaking, I realized that he’d been in a struggle with how much information to share and he’d decided he’d trust me not to freak out.
“You’ve captured his attention. Coxy’s a man who’s used to getting what he wants. He knows I consider you mine. This is a declaration of war.”
I gasped. Tod gasped. Chowleena barked.
“But I don’t want him! He’s icky,” I said.
“A lot of women get past icky when they get seventeen hundred dollar dresses delivered to their door,” Lee answered.
“I might get past icky for that dress. It’d go with my shoes,” Tod put in.
Lee was looking at me. “What about you?”
I felt my blood begin to boil and my eyes narrow. I put my free hand on my hip and assumed a posture that screamed attitude.
“Seriously?” I asked, I couldn’t believe he actually expected an answer.
Lee kept watching me.
“Icky is icky. There’s no getting past icky. He’s not only icky, he’s creepy. Even if you could get past icky, you can’t get past creepy. Jeez.”
Lee showed no reaction to my response. “Don’t leave the house.”
Then he was gone, leaving me with the roses.
Once the door closed, Tod turned to me.
“Girlie, he is fine. He’s fine times twelve. He’s the new definition of fine.”
“I’ve been in love with him since I was five,” I told Tod.
“I’m in love with him now. I want to have his children,” Tod told me.
We were both still staring at the door and I was still holding the roses.
“He scares me now. He’s an adult. He has a head on his shoulders. He’s good at this relationship stuff. I think he’s serious about me. And he runs in some pretty frightening circles.”
“Girlie, you fuck this up and I’m calling the boys in the white jackets. You let something that fine slip through your fingers, you deserve a padded room. Especially if he’s good at relationship stuff. Most especially if he’s serious about you. No one who looks like that and fills out a pair of jeans like that is good at relationship stuff. I don’t care if he runs through the seven circles of hell.”
Tod had a point.
I put the roses down on a side table, I needed to do something normal. If I didn’t do something normal, I was gonna get a first class ticket on the first plane to San Salvador. I was beginning to realize the allure of San Salvador.
“I need to finish my macaroni salad and make brownies. Wanna help?”
Tod shrugged.
“Sure, you watch Chowleena, I’m going next door to get my gun.”
“Your gun?”
“Hunk of Burning Love is out there fighting a war for you so someone has to protect you. I’ll be right back.”
Tod left to get his gun and I threw a doggie biscuit to Chowleena.
This new turn with Terry Wilcox meant my life was officially fucked up.
I could have a meltdown but instead I made macaroni salad.
I’d save the meltdown for later…
Hopefully when I was in Grand Lake.
Chapter Ten
We’re in Together-Limbo
Tod and I finished the macaroni salad and made the brownies and because we were both pumped up on adrenalin by being held at gunpoint and shot at, we made chocolate pecan pie. The whole time we did this, I fielded phone calls. Some of them were (obviously bogus) Rosie or Duke sightings, most of them were from girlfriends and the conversations with my girlfriends were all the same.
Question: Was it true, had I hooked up with Liam Nightingale?
Answer: (a hesitant) Yes.
Option: (pick one or multiple choice) Squeal / Shout / Curse / Scream / Shriek (usually the word: Ohmigod!)
Question: Had we done it yet?
Answer: We’re taking it slow.
Then a lot of yelling about what was taking me so long, questions about how Lee kissed (“you have kissed him, haven’t you?”), more resurfacing of the nasty bra-bow rumor, etc. I thanked God that I had such a long apprenticeship at being cagey and a master liar because it sure came in handy.
After all of our grueling activity, Tod and I headed up to my balcony with the phone and an egg timer and collapsed into lounge chairs.
I didn’t trust myself not to fall asleep and get burned to a crisp, so we set the timer and every fifteen minutes we turned.
Unfortunately, we eventually forgot to set the timer, the phone finally went silent and I fell into an unscheduled Disco Nap. Fortunately, I was not the kind of redhead with freckles all over that burned within seconds of the sun touching my skin. Not to mention, I’d re-dosed with factor 8 before hitting the lounge and was already nursing a pretty deep base tan.
I was lying on my stomach and I felt something on my shoulder. I whirled around on my lounge chair and brought my hands up in the karate position that all of Charlie’s Angels used.
Lee was crouched beside me.
“I thought I told you to stay in the house,” he said, his voice was low but not angry, his eyes were on my hands and I could see the corners crinkled in a semi-smile at the sides of his cool sunglasses.