A few seconds went by. Hell, I hadn’t told anyone. I didn’t want anyone to know, because I wanted to feel normal if it was my last autumn on this earth.
“Yeah, man.” I bit down on my lip, still refusing to make eye contact. “I’m sick.”
“How sick?” Gabe sat in the chair by my desk. I could see his feet tapping against the floor whether it was in nervousness or just awkwardness I couldn’t tell because I was still being a pansy and staring at the floor.
“Really sick.” My voice broke. Damn it.
“Are you going to get better?”
I laughed without humor and finally lifted my gaze to meet his. “I have no idea. I find out in four weeks.”
“What happens in four weeks?”
“Nosy bastard, aren’t you?”
He grinned and gave me a haphazard shrug.
I sighed and shook my head. “Surgery, and if it doesn’t work, or if I die during it, yeah, well… it’s curtains I guess on either end.”
“So it’s going to be fine then? You’ll be fine?”
“Define ‘fine’?” I laughed, the sound harsh in my quiet room. “If dying is fine, then yeah, I’ll be fine. If living for a few more months while my body gets slowly stolen away from me by unhealthy cells, then yup. Fine, fine, fine, so damn, fine.” I wiped my face with my hands and groaned.
“She doesn’t know, does she?” Gabe asked.
“Hell, no.”
“Don’t tell her.”
“What?” My head snapped up. “Are you sure that’s a good idea?”
“It will only freak her out, especially since you’re going to be fine, right?” He gave me a confident smile. “You can beat it.”
It was the first time someone had said that to me.
Everyone else had been so concerned. David about the symptoms, my dad about depression, nobody — not even the doctor — had told me I was strong enough to take it.
I nodded jerkily, trying not to cry like a baby and said, “You’re right. I will beat it.”
“Or I’ll beat you.” Gabe laughed. “For not only breaking her heart but dying after Homecoming. I mean, seriously? Even you have to admit how messed up that is.”
“Yeah, well.” I kicked off my shoes and lay down on the bed. “I like her. I want to spend time with her and time isn’t something I really have. It’s a luxury you know? People don’t realize how lucky they are. Do you even realize how much it pisses me off when people complain about silly things like their lunch being crappy or their coffee tasting bad? I would drink shitty coffee and eat rotten food for the rest of my life if I could just have a life. You know?”
“Yeah,” Gabe said softly. “I can’t say I know what you’re going through, but I can imagine how bad that would suck, to know that you may not be here to enjoy even the shitty things life has to offer, because at least you’d be here, at least you’d be—”
“Alive,” I finished. “I’d be alive.”
“So live now,” Gabe challenged. “Go kiss that freshman you convinced me you had no feelings for.”
“I plan on it.” My grin was so wide it hurt.
“Good talk.” Gabe laughed. “I’ll just show myself out.”
“Gabe?” I asked once he reached the door.
He turned and waited.
“Thanks for listening.”
He gave me a salute. “Yeah, well, I’m still going to kick your ass if you break her heart.”
“Don’t worry. I imagine she’s going to be the one doing the breaking.”
“How do you figure?” He crossed his arms and leaned against the door frame.
“Because in the end, I won’t have anything to give her that’s worth having.”
“Do yourself a favor.” Gabe pushed away from the door, “Let her be the one to make that choice in the end. Not you.”
I nodded. Yeah, I could do that. I owed her that much, and I’d sure as hell die trying. I smirked at the double meaning.
Gabe waved goodbye and walked off. Who would have thought Gabe had a heart? Or that he was that deep? Just goes to show what you miss in life when you aren’t really looking.
Seek and you’ll find.
Act like an ass and you’ll only see your reflection in the mirror.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Holy crap. I was going to eat turkey in front of Randy Michels. Uncle Jobob was going to flip!
Kiersten
“He got down on bended knee?” Lisa screeched as she ran around my room in a frenzy. “What did you do?”
“I said yes, of course.” I laughed, throwing some more clothes into my suitcase. I wasn’t really sure what I wanted to bring or wear. Uncle Jo about crapped himself when I told him the plan. He was so happy I was actually doing something that he started crying on the other end of the phone. When I pointed it out, he said a mosquito had flown into his eye. Right, in November.
It also helped matters that he’d idolized Randy Michels for years. I was under strict instructions by my uncle to marry Wes at all costs. He even offered to drive us to Vegas. Yeah, so basically I had the coolest uncle in the world. Nobody could argue that. He and my aunt were planning a huge celebration with the rest of the family. They were going to Skype me on Turkey Day so I could say hi to everyone.
“I would have freaked out.” Lisa fell onto my bed with a loud sigh. “I mean, I’m freaking out now and it didn’t even happen to me!”
“Right.” I tugged a shirt out from underneath her and folded it into my suitcase.
“You’re dating Weston Michels.” She gave another giggle and then jolted up from her bed, “Oh my gosh! Have you sl—”
“Don’t go there.” I pointed at her face. “We’ve kissed, like once — or twice now, actually.”
“What? Twice?” I swear her scream just woke hibernating bears in Alaska. “And you didn’t tell me?”
“I knew,” Gabe said from the door, giving me a wink and slapping me on the shoulder as he walked by.
“Helpful Gabe, thank you.” I glared.
Lisa crossed her arms and pouted. “Everyone knew but me?”
“No, Gabe just saw me doing the walk of shame one morning and jumped to conclusions. I had to clear the air, otherwise he would have assumed the worst, because well, it’s Gabe.”
“True.”
“And the rest is history.”
Lisa seemed satisfied with that answer because about two minutes later she grinned. “Is he a good kisser?”
“Do we have to discuss this now?” Gabe complained. “Wait until I’m not in the room.”
“So leave.” Lisa shrugged.
“Can’t.” He pushed her to the side of the bed so he could sit down. “I have to send off my favorite girl. You know, give her all the normal warnings about what guys think, and why she should never under any circumstances watch a movie with a member of the opposite sex after eleven p.m.”
“Huh?” I stopped folding clothes. “Why not?”
“Sex.” Gabe glared “Studies show that testosterone skyrockets while watching horror movies, add that into nighttime and touching, and you, my friend, have a recipe for a baby rattle and no future.”
Lisa gaped. “Wow, where were you during my sex ed classes in high school?”
“Players know the game well, don’t they?” I teased.
“Only the stars.” He blew me a kiss and held up his hand for a high five.
Lisa slapped it.
I rolled my eyes at her.
“What?” She shrugged. “He really is so talented in the field.”
“And you know this how? Cousins? Remember?”
“Family equals no secrets.” Lisa nodded. “And it helps that three sororities rank guys on a scale of one to ten. Care to take a guess about Gabe’s rating?”
“Five?” I lifted my eyebrows.
Gabe shot me a glare.
“Eleven.” Lisa sounded proud. “They put him in his own ranking.”
“I’ll probably be president one day.” Gabe gave us both cocky grins and patted himself on the back.