“I’m sorry, I don’t.”
“We haven’t eaten in a week.” Dee felt unstable, eased her right leg back to brace herself against falling. “I don’t want to keep aiming this gun at your face.”
“That’d be all right with me, too.”
She lowered the Glock, slid it into the back of her waistband.
Ed started to bend down. Stopped midway. “I’m picking up my gun, but there’s no threat intended.”
“Okay.”
He ducked behind the door, lifted the revolver off the pavement, and came toward them. Squatted down to Cole’s eye-level.
“I’m Ed,” he said. “What’s your name?”
Cole didn’t reply.
“Tell him your name, buddy.”
“Cole.”
“Do you like Snickers candy bars?”
Dee’s stomach fluttered with a new pang of hunger.
“Yes sir.”
“Well, you’re in luck.”
“Are you a nice person?”
“I am. Are you?”
Cole nodded and Ed pushed against his knees and stood to face Naomi.
“I’m Naomi,” she said.
“Glad to meet you, Naomi.”
Dee extended her hand. “Ed, I’m Dee.”
“Dee, very nice to meet you.”
The upwelling came so fast and unexpectedly that she fell toward Ed and wrapped her arms around his neck. Sobbing. Felt him patting her back, couldn’t pick out the words, but the deep tone of his voice which seemed to move through her like thunder was the closest she’d come to comfort in days.
Ed pulled the Cherokee into the meadow and got out and popped the hatch. Dee and the kids gathered around as he rifled through a banker’s box of packaged food. Three more plastic gas containers crowded the backseats, numerous jugs of water on the floorboards.
Dee sat in the back with Naomi and Cole, her fingers over-anxious and shaking as she ripped open Cole’s wrapper. At the smell of chocolate and peanuts, her hunger swelled into an ache.
They had two candy bars each and several apples, shared a gallon of water from a glass jug. So ravenous it felt less like eating and drinking, more like finally breathing again after being held underwater. When they’d finished, it was all Dee could do not to beg for more, but from the look of things, Ed was light on provisions.
“Where you coming from?” she asked.
He sat in the grass near the rear bumper, just inside the field of illumination thrown from the Jeep’s rear dome light. “Arches in Utah.”
“You a park ranger?”
“Yep.”
“We left Albuquerque. . .I don’t know, three weeks ago, I guess? What day it is.”
“Friday. Well, early Saturday now.”
“We were trying to get to Canada. Heard there were refugee camps across the border.”
“I heard the same.”
“Have you run into much trouble?”
He shook his head. “I left three days ago. Been traveling mainly at night, and in fact, I actually need to keep moving.”
He rose to his feet. Dee noticed he wore green pants and a long-sleeved, gray button-up, wondered if this was his ranger uniform.
She said, “Would you let us come with you?”
“I can’t fit you all inside.”
“Then take my children.”
“Mom, no.”
“Shut up, Na. Would you? Please?”
Ed took out his revolver.
“I need you out of my Jeep right now. I’ve given you some of my food, my water. I’ll even leave a jug with you, but I cannot take you.”
Dee stared down at her filthy, stinking shoes.
“We’ll die out here.”
“And we may all die if you come with me. Now get out of there. I have to go.”
Dee stood watching the Jeep move across the meadow and into the road, heard the engine rev, saw its taillights wink out, listening as it sped away from them into the darkness.
Naomi was crying. “You should’ve shot him, Mom. You had him back there with his gun on the ground and you just let him—”
“He’s not a bad man, Na.”
“We’re going to die now.”
“He wasn’t trying to hurt us. You want to live in a world where we have to kill innocent people to survive? I won’t do that. Not even for you and Cole. There’s things worse than dying, and for me, that’s one of them.”
Cole said, “Listen.”
An engine was approaching. The shadow of that Jeep reappeared and shot out a triangle of light as it entered the meadow.
The engine cut off.
Ed climbed out.
“I’m not happy about this,” he said, walking around to the back, popping the hatch. “Not one goddamn bit. So don’t say anything, for God’s sake don’t thank me. Just get over here and help me make some room.”
Ed loaded what would fit into the cargo area and made just enough room for Naomi and Cole in the backseat. Dee climbed in up front, buckled herself in, and Ed cranked the engine. Heat rushed out of the vents. The digital clock read 2:59 a.m. Ed put the car into gear and eased across the meadow, over the shoulder, back onto the road.
Turned on the stereo as he accelerated.
Dirty blues blasting from the speakers: “She’s a kindhearted woman, she studies evil all the time/She’s a kindhearted woman, she studies evil all the time/You well’s to kill me, as to have it on your mind.”
Dee leaned against the window, watched the trees rush by. Felt so strange to be moving this fast again, the pavement streaming under the tires. The road snaked down through the spruce forest on a steep descent from the pass and her ears kept popping and clogging, the world loud, then muffled, then loud again when she swallowed. With the moon full and high, it struck the road like sunlight and made shadows of the trees. The view to the west was long, and through the windshield she could see the massive skyline of the Tetons.
Dee glanced back between the front seats—Cole and Naomi sleeping sprawled across each other. She reached over, touched Ed’s shoulder.
“You saved our lives.”
“What’d I say about thanking me?”
“I’m not thanking you, just stating a fact.”
“Yeah, but I didn’t want to, that’s the thing. I’m a supremely selfish fuck.”
Dee tilted her seat back. “Let me know if you want me to drive.”
He grunted, his hands tapping time to the blues, Dee wondering if he’d have sung along if they weren’t in the car with him.
“You can sing if you want,” she said. “Won’t bother us.”
“Might want to be more careful about what you offer in the future,” he said, and started to sing.
His voice was awful.
She dozed against the window, dipping in and out of dream fragments that she couldn’t quite commit herself to before settling finally into a hard and dreamless sleep.
Next time she woke, it was 5:02 a.m.
Still dark out the windows except where the faintest purple had begun to tint the eastern sky. Naomi and Cole slept. The music had stopped.
“Want me to drive for a bit so you can sleep?”
“No, I was going to stop a few miles ahead anyway. Get us off the road for the daylight hours.”
* * * * *
THE lodge towered like a mountain against the predawn sky. They pulled under the front portico. The kids were stirring, woken by the cessation of movement. Ed turned off the engine and stepped out and opened the back hatch. Took a flashlight from one of the supply boxes.
The red double doors stood ajar and they pushed through them.
Ed flicked on the flashlight.
“Anybody here?” His voice echoed through the immense lobby as the beam of his light passed across the hearth and moved up seven stories of framework supported by a forest of burnished tree trunks.
No response.
“Ever been here?” Ed asked.
“Once,” Dee said.
They climbed the stairs to a row of rooms that overlooked the upper porch. Dee and the kids took one with two queen beds. The walls were cedar-paneled. A cast-iron radiator occupied the space beneath the window, and they didn’t need a flashlight anymore with dawn fading up through the dormer.