What is he talking about? Doesn’t he understand what this means? For both of us?
“But what about soccer? What about my business? They’ll ruin us!” I cry.
Standing, Levi pulls me up and into his arms, holding me firmly against him. Beneath my ear, I hear the heavy beat of his heart thumping madly in his chest. As calm as he appears, he’s as upset about this as I am.
“They can try, but it doesn’t matter. Nothing matters but you, me, and our baby. Soon, the divorce will be final and all of this will be yesterday’s news.”
Tilting my head back, I meet his turquoise stare. “Do you really think so?”
He brushes my messy hair back over my shoulders and flashes a small smile. “Yeah, baby, I do. We just need to stay strong and stick it out. Nothing they say or do can touch us as long as we have each other. Deal?”
I want to believe him, but I have my doubts. Who wouldn’t? Media is a scary thing. It’s a monster that lives to tear people apart. Levi and I? We’re not exactly a power couple. Even under the best of circumstances, this would be a challenge. I’m just not sure that Levi and I have what it takes to overcome this. But, God, I hope like hell that we can. We at least have to try.
Mustering up a false smile, I tighten my hold around his waist and bury my face in his chest just beneath his chin. “Deal.”
26
The last few weeks have been an absolute nightmare. Levi is doing everything in his power to deflect the attention from me, but the media is a relentless bitch. Maybe it wouldn’t have been so bad if we hadn’t had to say goodbye the next day, but we did. Levi has commitments that don’t involve sticking around in Ohio with me.
So while he’s off doing interviews and shooting commercials and posing for photo shoots, I’m back here trying—and failing—to ignore the circus lurking outside my front door.
The only thing I’m famous for is a stupid kiss with America’s number one bad boy, but apparently that makes me the current hot topic.
It wouldn’t be so bad if they’d leave me alone, but I can’t walk out the door anymore without a camera shoved in my face and some asshole shouting questions at me. A problem that was made even worse when they found out about the baby. All it took was one reporter following me to the doctor’s office, and there I was, splashed across every online magazine imaginable. Under Levi’s strict instruction, I keep my head down and refuse to answer anything. Just keep walking.
So that’s what I do. Every day I put on my bitch mask and walk out the door to a sea of chaos. I spend the next eight hours hiding inside the Center, a veritable prisoner inside my own place of business.
But, hey, business is better than ever. People can’t wait to get a look at the girl who tamed soccer’s notorious womanizer.
I’m just thankful that what staff I do have aren’t the judgy type. Even if they are, they certainly don’t do it while I’m around. Janey has been especially understanding and supportive. Her first words to me were, “Fuck ‘em all. There is absolutely nothing wrong with being in love with your stepbrother. It’s not like you two are actually related.”
I think I breathed my first full breath for the first time that day.
Her words are always at the forefront of my mind now. Every time I begin to doubt myself and this relationship, I recite them to myself and then remember the deal Levi and I forged. We’re stronger together. We will get through this.
I just wish he was actually here to do that.
Some days it feels like I’m the only one who’s wading knee-deep in the fallout of that picture, but I know that’s not true. I’ve watched some of his interviews, read the articles, and Levi is definitely working hard to put out fires.
“What do your parents think about your relationship?” one interviewer asked him.
His response: “They have nothing to do with this. Once their divorce is finalized, we’ll just be two people in love.”
When the news got out that we were expecting, another asked, “Are you afraid the baby will be deformed?”
Levi laughed, his mocking smile bright as he looked into the camera and said a definitive “No.” He then went on to ream the interviewer, setting him straight on how bloodlines work and the impossibility of any deformities or maladies based on the fact that we shared no genetic material and were, in fact, not brother and sister as they love to tout around.
I have never been prouder of him than I was in that moment. I was crying when he called that night, unable to hold back the waterworks as I told him how utterly amazing I thought he was.
He’s all I can think about, but today it’s made even worse by the fact that I have a doctor’s appointment and I’m not sure if he’s going to make it or not. When we spoke on the phone last night, he informed me that he would be in Michigan come morning for a shoot, but that he would try his best to be here.
Since it’s an afternoon appointment, I’m crossing my fingers real hard. I want this to be a shared experience. There’s nothing lonelier than going through the birth of your first child alone. I had been willing to do it before we reconnected, but now I want him by my side for all of it. He should be, since this is his first child, too. He should be present for all the firsts.
“You’re all set, Mrs. Piccilo,” I tell the woman laying on my table. Shifting sideways on my stool, I wipe the massage oil lacing my fingers onto a plush white hand towel.
“I feel so relaxed,” Mrs. Piccilo says with a refreshed smile, “I hardly have the energy to leave. Wonderful job, Vista. Same time next week?”
I nod as I stand and see her out. “Same time next week.” She heads to reception to schedule her next appointment and I head back to hand her chart off to Bethany so she can get it filed away. It’s been such a long day already, but it’s not even close to being over.
“It’s five,” Janey reminds me.
I glance at the clock and curse. “Time got away from me. You two will be alright here?” There’s one more hour left until closing, and I hesitate to leave even though there’s no one else on the schedule. Although, anyone in need of my skillset is required to have an appointment, so the girls and Dana, my second in command as I like to call her, are more than capable of holding down the fort. It’s just hard to relinquish control.
Janey waves me off like I’m being ridiculous. “Yes, Mom. Go, get out of here. Shoo!”
Snagging my purse from the locked drawer of her desk, I give her a quick hug, wish everyone a good evening, and head out.
Levi isn’t waiting for me outside, so it’s a long and contemplative drive over in the quiet cab. The doctor’s office isn’t much better. I sign in and take a seat, making sure to leave one open just in case. Wishful thinking is now in full effect.
There are two other women in the waiting room with me. One with a newborn sleeping in its car seat at her feet and a toddler who’s discovered the floor is made of lava. He’s leapfrogging from one connected chair to another. I bury my nose in a magazine, trying my best not to pay too much attention to the little monster, but I’m terrified he’s going to fall and break a leg. His mother, on the other hand, is completely at ease.
I wonder how she does it and if I’ll be able to find that kind of calm. I imagine that I will be a pretty high-strung mom. I’ve seen the kind of damage seemingly simple acts can do to the human body. Hell, Levi’s a prime example. All it took was a hit to the shin in precisely the right way and he had to undergo surgery and weeks of physical training to get back on his feet.
Right. I’m here for a checkup. If I don’t distract myself, I’ll end up down in the ER from skyrocketing blood pressure.
“Vista?”
My head jerks up at the sound of my name and I cast the magazine aside, following the nurse back, letting her know that Levi might show up a little late so they’ll send him back. In the narrow hallway, I kick off my shoes so she can get my weight, then she hands me a plastic cup and a few packets of Sani Wipes.