“Friend?” Rosie raised her eyebrows.
“Yes, Rosie,” I said wryly. “We’re just friends.”
“You don’t have any feelings for him?”
I frowned. “Not those kind of feelings. I’m not ready to dive into anything new. Not just yet.”
“Well, I can say, hand on heart, Gabe has feelings for you. I’ve seen the two of you together. The kid can hardly take his eyes off you.”
I knew Rosie wasn’t making it up. I sensed that Gabe had feelings for me, and I didn’t want to lead him on. Nor did I want to stop seeing him.
“I don’t know about that, Rosie.”
“You’re such a bad liar, Audrey.”
I picked Gabe up from his uncle’s later that afternoon. It was my first day as a mobile person, and I was loving every minute of it. I had no idea how restrictive my life had been prior to this independent, self-sufficient me.
Gabe was in blue overalls bent over the open hood of an electric-blue Chevy when I walked in. He looked up, caught my eye, and smiled. For the first time, I did feel something, a small flutter in my chest.
He gave me an expectant look. “So?”
“I got it!
He grinned. “Another one for the toolbox.”
I smiled. “I guess so.”
After Gabe finished up, I drove us back to my place, and he helped me out in the kitchen with the spaghetti and meatballs. The sauce was bubbling away in the pan when we decided to start on the Pinot. He was telling me a funny story about a customer who came in that day and was trying to barter his way out of paying the bill. Soon he had me in stitches.
“Look at you,” said Gabe.
“What about me?”
“When I first met you, you were like this fragile china doll. I just wanted to pick you up and put you in bubble wrap.”
I laughed. “You did?”
He nodded. “You just seemed kind of lost, unsure about yourself. Now it’s like you’re a different person.”
“How so?” I leaned my hip against the kitchen bench and took another sip of Pinot.
“You’re just . . . so alive now. You seem so strong and capable, like you’re ready to take on the world. You’re like the living version of a Karate Kid montage.”
I laughed.
“And your cheeks are glowing,” he continued. “It must be the mountain air.”
“I think it has a lot to do with you as well.” The words slipped out before I could stop them. I bit my lip and looked away.
“Do you mean that, Audrey?” Slowly, I turned my head back to meet his gaze.
I nodded. “I do.”
He took a step forward, his hand brushing my cheek. “I really like you,” he said.
I looked up at him. “I like you too.”
He leaned in and kissed me. His lips were soft and warm, and I suddenly realized how much I missed this kind of intimacy.
“I’ve wanted to do that for ages,” he said, when he broke away.
“Why didn’t you?”
“I wasn’t sure how you felt.”
We moved into each other and kissed again. I put my wine glass down and wrapped my arms around his neck, wanting desperately to lose myself in the moment. Then out of nowhere and without warning, I was hit by a wave of sadness.
I pulled away.
“Are you okay?” he asked, his eyes searching mine.
“No.” My voice was barely a whisper. “I don’t think so.”
“What’s wrong?”
“I don’t know, exactly,” I said, shaking my head again. The sadness that had begun in the pit of my stomach was spreading through my body and growing in intensity. “I just—” my voice caught on a sob, catching me completely off guard. Tears rolled down my cheeks one after another, like a sudden deluge of rain erupting from a perfectly blue sky.
“Audrey,” he said and took a step back as I wiped at my face with my hands.
“I’m sorry. I don’t know why I’m crying. It’s not you . . . you’ve been nothing but wonderful.” I gave him a helpless look.
He sighed. “Rosie mentioned there was someone back home—someone you were trying to forget. She said that was the reason you came all the way out here. Is that who you’re crying about?”
I looked at him. “I don’t know—maybe.”
“Look, I’m not here to rush you into anything. I like you, but I’m just as happy to be your friend. Okay?”
“Okay,” I whispered.
We were quiet for a few minutes. Then I reached over and took his hand. “Just because I’m not ready right now doesn’t mean I won’t ever be.”
“I know,” he said, giving my hand a squeeze. “This kind of stuff—you can’t set a time or date to it.”
“No, you can’t.”
“Especially when you lose someone who meant a lot to you.”
I drew in a deep breath. “I think it was the first time I was truly in love, if you know what I mean.”
“I do.” A sad look crossed his face. “A girl broke my heart a few years back, and I still think about it sometimes.”
“What happened?”
“Birdie’s an artist. She got a job offer in New York with an ad agency. We tried to do the long-distance thing for a while, but she met someone else.”
“I’m sorry.”
“What happened with your guy? How did it come to an end?”
“To be honest, I don’t know if things did end with Rad—that’s his name. I feel like we’re still unfinished business, like we’re in limbo. I suppose that’s why I can’t seem to move on. There’s this connection between us that will probably always be there. Even if I never see him again.”
“Like the rope between the ship and the mooring?”
“Exactly like that.”
Before I knew it, we were barreling our way toward spring, and I got an e-mail from Dale with the date of their return. I was sad to be leaving this beautiful house and especially to be parting ways with Apple, whom I adored. Still, I knew how lucky I was to have spent the winter here. After the first hike with Gabe that day, the anxiety about my writing had lifted, and I was churning out some decent work. I had sent a handful of short stories to Angie, and his response was encouraging. I didn’t want to think too much about what I would do next—where I would live and how to pay my bills. I just hoped that my luck would hold out and something would turn up.
One day, Gabe came over, and I could tell there was something on his mind. We were lounging on the couch by the fire, with Apple bounding between us in excited bursts, when I decided to bring it up.
“Gabe? You’ve been so quiet today. Is everything okay?”
“Everything’s fine, Audrey,” he said. “I’ve just been thinking. You know Dale and Graham are coming home soon.”
I nodded.
“What are you planning on doing when they’re back?”
“I suppose I should start house hunting. I’ve been careful with the money they left me, so I should have enough to rent a place for the next few months. I was also thinking of getting a job in town. I saw a sign posted at the veterinarian—they’re looking for a new receptionist. Anyway, I’m thinking of applying.”
“So you want to stay here? In Delta, I mean.”
“Yeah. This town has been good for me. I can drive now, and I’m learning to cook. I’m at least halfway through writing my first book. Plus,” I smiled, “I can crack open a chestnut with one hand and pull the shell away clean. How many people do you know who can manage something like that?”
A soft smile played on his lips, and I knew he was thinking back to the day we met when he was selling chestnuts at the market.
“All in all,” I continued, “my toolbox is looking pretty healthy these days.”