He stops a few steps from me and he tilts his head, just staring at me.
“Jack, we have to think this through. Sex is a huge thing for me.” Immediately I feel rotten for what I just said, “I’m not saying it’s not a big thing for you.” Immediately my eyes drop to his hard cock.
Oh my word! I’m making such a mess of this.
“River, keep quiet,” Jack murmurs.
I keep my mouth shut because of the look on his face. This is not the Jack I’ve come to know. This is someone else. This is a man.
Have I been blind all this time, not allowing myself to see the real man that’s been there all along? I kept telling myself Jack needed time, but I was wrong – I was the one who needed time, but not anymore. All I need now is Jack.
“Please don’t be mad at me,” Jack whispers. “I had to go do that. I had to kill them and stop them from hurting anyone else.”
How can I be mad at him for what he did? It’s something he had to do to find himself. I’ve killed for much less than what Jack has killed for. It’s not my place to judge.
“Please,” he begs me, and it’s only then I realize that I haven’t answered him yet.
“I’m not mad at you, Jack. I understand what you had to do.”
He rushes forward and grabs hold of me. He lifts me against his still wet chest. He then takes a few long strides and tosses me on the bed.
He follows, landing on top of me. We both gasp at the impact and then he kisses me. He kisses me hard, with the same need and hunger I’ve been feeling for him.
Jack is right. We can talk later. I get lost in his kisses, forgetting the past and only living in the moment.
This is it.
This is the moment we finally let go of our pasts that have haunted us for so long.
This is the moment we find ourselves in each other.
I’m never letting him go after this, and by the way his hands are roaming my body, I know he’ll never let go of me.
The first time I had sex was out of spite. It meant nothing. The second time was forced on me. This time I’m doing it for myself. I’m doing it for Jack. I want him to know how much I love him and how special I know he is.
I want this so much!
Excitement pulses through me. I quickly yank my shirt off and by accident my hand slams into Jack’s jaw. Hard! He grunts with pain and we both sit up. I can only stare at him wide-eyed.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper.
He looks at me, his eyes intense with need. He drives his body back against mine and his hands go to my hair. He pulls my face to his, our mouths greedily resuming the kiss.
He lays me back down on the bed and his one hand finds my breast. I can feel a wisp of ecstasy. I place my hand on his side and then suddenly he jerks away from me.
Breathless, he stares at me for a moment.
“I’m sorry,” I start to apologize. I must have tickled him.
“River, just relax,” he says. “No touching my sides and no hitting me.” I see the spark in his eyes and I realize he’s teasing me. He lowers himself back to me again and his fingers caress my cheek. “It’s just us here.” He kisses me once and then whispers against my lips, “It’s just you,” kiss, “and me.”
And then his mouth starts to move lower, down my neck and to the curve of my breast. He quickly gets rid of the bra, takes one of my nipples between his lips, and sucks.
It feels so good that I arch into him, wanting him to do more to me than just kiss.
He must sense my need because he starts to move down again, his mouth placing soft kisses over my belly, and then his hands are on the button of my shorts.
He pushes up to his knees and I watch as he pulls the shorts down my legs. Once he’s rid of the shorts he leans over me.
I look up at him and I see the most beautiful man. His face looks rugged and handsome. His eyes are twin pools of heat and want. He placed a hand on either side of my head, keeping his upper body up. Of course I stare! Even all the scars can’t rob him of his beauty, and only lend to his manliness.
One hand slides into my undies and he pushes a finger deep inside of me, his palm pressing against my clit, just like he did when he made me come the other night.
My hands find his shoulders and I hold on for dear life as he pulls his finger out and then thrusts it back in. My hips start to move along with his hand, riding out the pleasure he’s creating.
When I can’t stand much more, I throw an arm to the side and yank the drawer open. I grab the condom I stole from Adam’s room when Jack and I started fooling around. Rather be prepared than left out in the cold when you need a condom most. I tear the foil packet open and taking his cock in my hands, I roll the condom over his hard length.
I fall back on the bed. Jack takes hold of my knees and opens my legs wide, to accommodate his body.
He presses his body down on mine and then our eyes meet. I feel his cock press against my opening and then he slowly slides into me. He closes his eyes and drops his head to my shoulder as a low moan drifts over his parted lips. “River,” he breathes my name, making it sound like a prayer.
His cock fills me, stretching me impossibly. At first it hurts a little because it’s been so long for me. He pulls out and then even slower than the first time, he enters me again.
I see the total bliss on his face. He keeps a torturous slow pace and it’s starting to drive me wild. My nails dig into his ass and I try to urge him on by lifting my hips to meet his.
Luckily for me it works, because he starts to move faster. “Harder,” the word slips through between gasps for air.
His hands move behind my shoulders and he lowers his body flat against mine. His fingers dig into my skin. His one leg moves in under my thigh, opening me up even more, and then he goes back to slowly fucking me, but this time it’s so deep with the way he’s positioned our legs.
He lifts the right side of his body and looks down between us. My eyes drift down and together we watch as he pulls out and then pushes back into me. It’s a huge turn-on, watching his cock thrust into me.
He’s pinning my body down so I can’t meet his thrusts. He’s in total control and I realize that’s what he needs. He needs to be the one fucking me. All I can do is let one hand find its way into his hair, while the other hand grabs hold of his arm resting next to me.
With each deep thrust my body starts to wind tighter and tighter.
Jack lifts his head and his eyes focus intensely on mine. They start to shine with unshed tears and it makes my heart melt. “I love you, Jack,” I whisper.
He presses his forehead to mine. I feel his hard body sliding against mine. I feel his cock filling me. I feel his breath on my lips and it all works together, taking me to the peak of ecstasy.
My body arches against Jack’s and then his body tenses over mine, and we come together, our bodies greedily riding out the pleasure we’ve created.
He doesn’t pull out immediately, but instead holds me. We keep breathing each other for a long while.
~*~
Jack is different … in a good way. He still asks questions. He still spends his days outside. We’ve resumed his writing and reading lessons, and we’re eating and sleeping together again.
But he’s different. He’s not as childlike as I remember. Yes, the sex might have something to do with it, but I think it’s more. It’s as if he’s at peace with himself. He doesn’t stumble over his feet to do what’s asked of him. He doesn’t leave the room when someone else comes in.
He looks comfortable in his skin.
I keep looking for any cracks, or signs that he might be putting up a front, but I can’t find any.
I’m busy with the books when Adam knocks on the door.
“Hey stranger,” I greet with a smile. I haven’t seen much of Adam since he’s been back.
He takes a seat in the chair across from mine. “Are you finally going to tell me what happened?” I ask. I haven’t been able to get anything from Jack, so I’m hoping Adam will tell me.
“No,” he says, without any hesitation. He pushes a hand through his hair and says, “Think of it as a boys night out.”