22 September — I am to go to the Peak District, and Lucy is to go to Brighton as a guest of Col. Fenton and his wife. Papa says nothing can happen to Lucy since she will be under the protection of the colonel. To Papa’s amusement, while discussing the militia, Mama told stories of the dances she had attended as a girl when her partners were also handsome officers. With his usual biting wit, Papa said, ‘And one of those handsome officers went off to the colonies, where he was promptly dispatched by savages.’ To which Mama replied, ‘Not killed, dear, but died of dysentery.’ I am still uneasy about Lydia, but everyone did have a good laugh.
Lizzy kept up her diary all during her trip. By the time her party had reached Derbyshire, she was thoroughly sick of visiting “great” estates and was looking forward to walking a mountain path. She wrote very little about her upcoming visit to Montclair, and I wondered if it was her way of putting off thinking about her reunion with Will Lacey.
11 October — I will never forget my first view of Montclair. The carriage came over a gentle rise, and there before us was this beautiful mansion all lit up for our arrival. The carriage stopped near a large fountain where we were assisted by servants in livery. I wore the same ivory dress I had worn to the ball at Helmsley Hall. It is the very best dress I own, but it was nothing compared to the finery worn by Georgiana and Anne. For the first time since we met, I heard Anne laugh. She is like a bird set free from her cage. Georgiana played the most beautiful instrument I have ever seen, a recent gift from her brother.
12 October — Georgiana invited us to join her at Montclair while the men went fishing. When they returned, Mr. Lacey suggested we all walk around the lake. Aunt and Uncle declined, and, of course, Anne could not join us. We had gone but five minutes when Georgiana said she thought she should go back to the house to keep Anne company. It was clear she had planned this all along, and I said as much to her brother, who found it amusing. We arrived at a sitting area where you can view the lake and the beautiful countryside. It was there that Mr. Lacey said in a very halting manner: ‘When we were in Kent, my proposal, I mean, what I said, was offensive to you, and I wish to apologize.’ I asked him if he regretted the proposal or just the manner in which it was delivered. He then laughed and smiled and said, ‘I know I am forgiven, Miss Elizabeth, because you tease only your friends.’ I told Mr. Lacey he was like a brother to Mr. Bingham, and because of that, we must always be friends. He looked at me very intently and said, ‘I would hope we could be more than friends.’ We continued our walk in silence, but he extended his arm, and I took it! I went to the inn that night quite pleased with how the day had gone. I will gladly return to this enchanted place. It must be enchanted. Look at the change in Mr. Lacey!
After touring the Peak District, Lizzy returned to Bennets End and almost immediately went to see Jane at Helmsley Hall, where she found her sister quite content in her new role as Mrs. Charles Bingham. When the Lacey party returned from Derbyshire, Jane and Charles hosted their first dinner party.
23 October — Mr. Lacey was most agreeable tonight. He asked about our tour of the Peak and Chatsworth after we left Montclair. As much as I enjoyed the remainder of our holiday, it was nothing to the three days we spent near his estate. Mr. Lacey said it was necessary for Georgiana to go up to London, so she might resume her studies. But more importantly, Lady Sylvia had written to Anne insisting she return to Kent for reasons of her health. What nonsense! Anne has never looked better and told me she spent a good deal of time out of doors on the terrace and frequently walked the gardens while at her cousin’s home. I think being free of her mother has actually strengthened her.
Before the Second World War scattered everyone around the country and the globe, young people in my hometown who were dating would see each other, if not every day, at least once a week on Saturday night, so for more than three weeks to pass between Jane’s dinner party and the next time Will Lacey was at Helmsley Hall seemed like an eternity to me. On the other hand, once they did get together, Lizzy was able to see Will every day because Jane had asked her sister to stay on at Helmsley Hall because she was feeling unwell.
24 November — Since Mr. Lacey’s arrival at HH, we have experienced very fine weather. As a result, Mr. Lacey and I have walked each morning in the park, and I have learnt so much about him and his family. From his description of his mother, it is hard to believe she was the sister of Lady Sylvia, their temperaments being quite the opposite, but Mr. Lacey defended his aunt, who was several years older than his mother and her brother, Viscount Devereaux. She had assumed the role of parent when their own mother had died. However, he admits that being in her company is very trying. He will get no argument from me on that!
25 November — Mr. Lacey informed me he is to return to London and asked if I would walk with him in the park. When we reached the top of a gentle slope, he placed his hat on the bench that is in a recess in the hedge. He then untied my bonnet and placed it on top of his hat. With no resistance from me, he took me in his arms and kissed me. It was not one kiss but many. I stupidly kept my hands at my side, and he took my arms and put them about his neck and kissed me again and told me he loved me. For one of the very few times in my life, I was speechless. That evening, while playing whist, I was unable to concentrate and played so badly that Jane asked if I was unwell. Before retiring, Mr. Lacey stopped me on my way upstairs and kissed me and held me tightly against him. He said if it were not for pressing business in London with George Bingham, nothing could compel him to leave Hertfordshire. He was gone at first light, and I watched his carriage until it disappeared down the London road.
When I read how Will had removed her bonnet so that he could kiss her, it was as erotic to me as if he had stripped her down to her chemise. At that time, touching an ungloved hand was considered to be sexy, so for Will Lacey to take off her hat so that he might kiss her, well, that got my heart beating. The next diary entry Beth had copied out was no surprise. The reason Jane was unwell was because she was pregnant. Lizzy noted she had “never seen a man as delighted as Charles was upon hearing that he was to be a father.” But Charles and Jane were not the only ones who were jumping with joy.
4 December — I have received a letter from Mr. Lacey professing his love for me. He tells me how he cherishes that moment in the park when we first kissed. It seems Mr. Lacey and I are of similar minds. Whenever I have a spare moment, all I can think about is how he took me in his arms and kissed me. I had never been kissed before, and it made me quite lightheaded. George Bingham and he are to travel to France on business. I do not understand why it is necessary for them to go at this time when there is such violence in Paris and elsewhere in France. There was a report in the newspapers that the Duchess of Devonshire’s carriage was attacked near Montpelier. It is best that I do not know where in France they are to go, as I am excessively worried without knowing the particulars.