“Could it possibly have been Dr. Charles Fenwick?”
She shook her head.
“Nothing so predictable … and really far more exciting. He wore a mask over his face and when he took it off, there he was black-haired, black-eyed, entirely wicked . our Demon Doctor. It was so maddening to be awakened just at that moment. I wanted to know what was going to happen next. You know, Anna, we have been rather forgetful of The Project all these weeks. I don’t think you have given any thought to anything but that Christmas tree. “
“It has taken a certain amount of planning, and then we have our other more arduous duties.”
“Oh, why didn’t you let me stay there in the forest with our Demon?”
“Come on. We’ll be late for breakfast.”
What a day it was! It stands out in my memory for ever. I was amazed what a transformation those Christmas trees made to the ward. Those who were well enough talked excitedly to each other and for days there had been a buzz of anticipation.
And now . Christmas Day! I thought of the festive season in India when the English community there were so anxious to make what they called an English Christmas. But how could they do that? It never seemed to be right somehow. The traditional Christmases I had known had been at the rectory, with the children’s party in the church hall and the carol singers coming round, standing at the gates, bearing lanterns, singing the carols we knew, out of tune perhaps, but that did not matter; and the services in church with the choir boys proclaiming in innocent, impersonal voices the glory of Christ’s birth, but in a way which betrayed that their thoughts were far away, and they were all the more moving because of that. Goose . and Christmas pudding brought to the table in a coating of brandy flames.
And Grace’s homemade wine and the services in church. These were the Christmases I remembered; the Christmases at the Minster, with the knowledge that Aubrey and I were growing farther and farther apart; Christmases with Julian the crib I had put in the nursery and the little baby Jesus who was to be slipped into it on Christmas Day, as I told myself that the next year he would understand what it was all about. But there was not to be a next year for him.
Christmas was a time for remembrance, and I had a feeling that this was going to be one which I should remember forever.
The excitement of the present-giving was all I had anticipated. Dr. Fenwick picked the numbers; Henrietta picked the names; and I found the present and took it to the patient for whom it was intended.
It was amazing how much pleasure these little gifts gave. It was not so much the handkerchief or the fan or the little jars and boxes; it was the spirit of Christmas; the fact that there was a day set apart from the others.
The presentation had taken place after the midday meal, and we gave a little concert if that was not too grand a name to put to it. One of the nurses played the recorder, and Dr. Kratz gave a performance on the violin. Henrietta, who had quite a pretty voice, sang.
I was deeply moved to watch her. She sang a variety of songs the old English ones which the patients could not have understood, but they loved them. It was all spontaneous and her choice was wide. We had The Vicar of Bray followed by Annie Laurie, Come, Lasses and Lads, followed by Early One Morning. She conveyed the exuberance of the country people so vividly that although they could not understand the words, they were aware of the sentiments expressed. With her fair curly hair looser about her face than she normally wore it for working the wards, she looked beautiful.
I noticed Dr. Fenwick watching her as she sang and I thought:
I believe he is falling in love with her.
It seemed to me so very natural that a man should fall in love with Henrietta.
The Christmas venture was as no one could deny an outstanding success, and with the honesty of the strong, the Head Deaconess did not attempt to do so. Others might have carped a little. It could have been said that some of the patients were overtired or that it had been disturbing for those who were very ill; but it was not. The advantages had far outweighed the disadvantages.
The Head Deaconess called Henrietta and me to her study and said: “It was very commendable. The doctors have nothing but praise. You both worked very hard, and did not neglect your other duties. “
“Who could believe it!” said Henrietta as we left her.
“Do you know, I think she almost smiled. She could not quite achieve such a tremendous undertaking, but I could see it was beginning to break out.”
“At least, she did admit it was a success.”
“She had to. It was obvious, wasn’t it?”
We lived in the glow of that success for several days and then it was the New Year.
“In a short time,” I reminded Henrietta, ‘we shall be leaving. “
“Shall you be sorry?”
“I don’t think so. It has been interesting. I feel I have learned a lot. I feel experienced … and it has been wonderful, but I should not want to spend my life here, would you?”
“It would be rather dull without Dr. Fenwick.”
I looked at her sharply.
“Well,” she said, ‘wouldn’t it be? “
“Of course.”
“He’s like a breath of home. It’s nice to have someone who sees our jokes … someone one can talk to naturally. You know what I mean.”
“I do.”
“He has a great admiration for you.”
“And for you, I think.”
She shrugged her shoulders.
“He really thinks there is some thing special about you. He says you should not be doing the humble tasks in nursing. You should be in charge, organizing … Oh yes, you have impressed him very much.”
“I think you have, too.”
“Two Englishwomen, obviously used to a little comfort coming out to a place like this. Of course, I didn’t tell him it was all part of a grand scheme and that in the guise of nurses we are sleuths on the track of a monster.”
“I’m glad you didn’t. He would have thought we were mad.”
She laughed and I wondered if she reciprocated the doctor’s feelings for her.
It was cold and there was snow on the mountains. We were told later that it could be heavy. Preparations were made in Kaiserwald as though for a siege. One of the nurses told me that we could wake up one morning to find the snow piled high, shutting us in. Last year, for three weeks, they had been unable to get out of the hospital. We had to be prepared for such things.
Henrietta and I were to leave in February. I knew that I should miss the place, but I did want to move on. There was no doubt in my mind that the change of scene, the sense of achieving a few steps towards my goal, had soothed my sorrow. But it was still there, ready to envelope me at any moment.
Charles Fenwick said that, if we agreed, he would arrange to travel back to England with us. Henrietta was delighted at the idea.
“Does that mean you will have to extend your stay here?” I asked.
“A little, perhaps, but I have spoken to the Head Deaconess and she is quite agreeable. She thinks you two ladies should have an escort and it would be unseemly for you to travel across Europe unattended.”
“We did come out alone.”
“Yes, but that rather shocked her. She will be pleased to allow me to remain until your departure which, I believe, is to take place at the beginning of February.”
So it was agreed.
The days took on a new quality because they were numbered. We savoured each one. I had proved without doubt that I had a talent for nursing; even the Head Deaconess recognized this and treated me with a respect she did not show to Henrietta or even to her trained nurses.
I had several talks with Dr. Fenwick in fact he seemed to talk with me more than with Henrietta. With me he discussed the patients’ illnesses, how best to treat them; he told me how frustrated he felt, how ignorant of causes; and how alarming it was to have to work in the dark, so often experimenting, as it were.