Yes, Pagiel as an Otherworldly Robin Hood was very much a possibility. With his powers to control wind and air, he’d also be a formidable—
“Oh Lord,” I said. A flashback came to me of that weird story in the news about a Tucson robbery. “I saw something about a grocery store in Tucson. That was him, wasn’t it?”
“Yes,” said Roland. “With a couple cronies. The one good thing is that they’re pretty fast and efficient. Most humans don’t know what they’re seeing when the hits occur, so there hasn’t been any mass hysteria about supernatural invaders—yet. And that’s the thing... .”
I snapped myself out of my dizzying ruminations and focused on him. The lines of his face were hard ... and filled with sorrow. “What is?”
“Do you know how hard it was for me to come to you? I swore nothing would get me out here ... no matter how many of those bastards come knocking at my door or tried to get me to tell where you were at.” I flinched, wondering just “how many” there had been. “I was willing to maintain the plan, no matter what, for as long as it took to keep you safe ... and then all this came along. Never in a million years could I have foreseen this.”
“I don’t think anyone could have,” I said softly. Roland was usually unshakeable; it was hard to see him so worked up.
“When I saw those people, what they were going through ... that nearly made me come for you then and there. Then, when I found out what that boy was doing ... well, that sealed it. We can’t have that, Eugenie. You know we can’t. If other gentry catch on to what he’s doing and realize they too can just march on over and take what they want, you can imagine the chaos that would follow. What’s really awful about it all is that in some twisted way, I understand why he’s doing it. He’s a kid. He sees a problem, and he’s trying to fix it. God help me, maybe I’d do the same in his place.”
It occurred to me then that Roland’s emotion wasn’t just because he’d come to me in exile or because of gentry going on rabid shopping trips. Those were upsetting him, but the real problem was that Roland’s worldview had been shaken. He’d spent his life in the shamanic trade, crossing worlds and ousting those who didn’t belong in ours. His view of the gentry had never been good, and it had worsened when he’d rescued my mother and later seen the way I’d been ensnared in magical schemes. Yet, now, through a weird series of events, against everything he’d always told himself, he’d suddenly come to see the gentry as ... people.
Having your beliefs radically altered like that—no matter what your age was—could be devastating. I knew that from personal experience.
I hugged him. “It’s okay,” I said, unable to remember any time in my life when I’d comforted him. “You did the right thing in coming to me. You’re right to feel like you do. I feel the same. It’s terrible—all of it.”
Roland awkwardly patted my back, and I knew he felt embarrassed by his emotions. With another sigh, he stepped back and regarded me wearily. “Yes, but what do we do about it? I can fight that kid off, you know. His hits are in Tucson—probably because of the gates—and I could easily call in a few outside shamans to help me. Still, I think a little reasoning might go farther.”
“It would,” I agreed. “Especially if it came from me.” It was also preferable to Pagiel getting banished. Unfortunately, me “reasoning” with him was easier said than done. “I have to go back.”
“Eugenie—”
“I can do it,” I said, more to myself than Roland. “I’ll be exposing myself, but it’ll be worth it—especially now that I’m not pregnant. Except, the thing is, if I leave here and let myself be known again ...” Here it was, the awful truth that had been building within me since Roland explained about the blight. “If I go to Tucson, I might as well go to the Otherworld while I’m at it. Once I’m out of here, I’m out. If there’s some way I can help undo what’s been done and save my people—to save everyone’s people—then I should do it.”
I could tell by his face that he’d been thinking along those lines but wasn’t happy about the options either. “They really are distracted,” he said. “Your enemies. They’d probably leave you alone if you could help them.”
I nodded. “I know. I’m not worried about myself. I’m worried about them.”
“The twins.”
I nodded again.
He took a long time in responding. “Well, the thing is, we can pull you out of here without anyone Otherworldly knowing where you were. And that means no one will know where the twins are either. They’ll be safe.”
“I know,” I said.
“Then what ... ?”
Something in my stomach sank. “I don’t want to leave them, plus I won’t be able to contact them or get updates. And if I go to the Otherworld ... well, you know how these things are. There’s no telling how long I’ll be gone.” The first time I’d gone to the Otherworld, I’d intended to make a quick late-night jaunt. By the time that mess was over, I’d ended up queen of the Thorn Land. “I don’t want to be away from them. I know it’s silly. They probably don’t even know I’m there, but I can’t help it. I just feel ...”
“Like a mother,” he said. He put his arm back around me, seeming more at ease as the one doing the comforting.
“I suppose,” I admitted. “I didn’t think it’d happen. I’ve spent all these months afraid of them, afraid of what was happening to my body ... and now that they’re here, I can’t imagine how I got by without them. Like I said, it’s silly ... especially since I’ve barely touched them.”
“It’s not silly at all.” He was quiet for a few moments. “You don’t have to go, you know. It’s a mess, but no one expects you to take care of it.”
“I do. These are my people—in the Otherworld and in Tucson. How could I ignore them and then try to teach my children to do what’s right? I would always know I’d abandoned everyone else. Of course, if gentry start regularly raiding our world, my failure would hardly be a secret.” I laughed but found little humor in anything right now. I leaned my head against his chest, like I used to when I was little. “I have to do this. Isaac and Ivy will be okay. No one knows they’re here, and Candace and Charles have enough love for quintuplets. If the twins are discharged before I get back, they’ll be more than taken care of. It’s just ...”
“What?” he asked gently.
I felt tears start to form in my eyes and willed them away. “I just wish I’d gotten the all-clear on holding them before I left.”
“You can wait,” he said. “Wait until you can hold them, then go to the Otherworld.”
For a moment, I was tempted. Nothing seemed more important in the world—in any world—than having my son and daughter in my arms. But the longer I put off dealing with the blight, the more people would suffer. Plus, I had an uneasy feeling that if I waited much longer, I might never actually leave. My life here had been slow and comfortable, which had been good for me. It was what I had needed. It was what the twins still needed. Staying here, living a sweet, uncomplicated life with them and the Reeds would be easy. I could sink into this life and never look back....
“No,” I said. “The sooner I take care of this blight business, the sooner I can come back to Isaac and Ivy.”
Roland held me tightly. “I’m sorry, Eugenie. I’m proud of you, but I’m so, so sorry.”
“Don’t be,” I said, pulling gently away. “This is the right thing to do. But before we leave, there’s something else we have to do.”
He gave me a curious look. “What’s that?”
I caught hold of his hand and tugged him forward. “Come meet your grandchildren.”
Chapter 11
Leaving was even harder than I’d thought it would be. And believe me, I’d expected it to be pretty hard.