She and Naoki had the highest opinion of Saori’s talents, Rumi said. All they wanted was for Saori to fulfill her own natural potential. She was almost begging now.
Saori said that she’d gotten the message. But had she?
After that, Rumi was more worried than ever about what was going on in Saori’s private life. She would interrogate her when she failed to show up for practice. She would ask her where she was going whenever she went out.
Soon after the turn of the year, Niikura remarked that there was something “not quite right” about Saori. She didn’t seem completely serious about her lessons.
“We’re almost ready to launch Saori’s career, but I don’t think that her heart’s in it like before. Still, I always thought she’d go through a phase like this. I should probably give her a good talking to.”
Rumi felt a surge of irritation. What was he saying? Managing Saori’s personal life was her responsibility.
And then that day—
It was late in the afternoon when she called Saori to arrange a meeting. She only said that “there was something important they needed to discuss,” but Saori seemed to know instinctively what it was about. From the tone of her voice, Rumi could imagine the sulky look on her face.
Rumi wasn’t sure where the best place for their heart-to-heart would be. She didn’t want anyone eavesdropping on them. Saori said that she’d rather meet outdoors than indoors, so they settled on a little out-of-the-way park.
When Rumi got there, the park was deserted, perhaps because of the ongoing construction work. There were no houses in the vicinity. The whole area was silent, lifeless.
The two women sat down side by side on a bench and Rumi got straight to business. Niikura had finally twigged that something was going on. Saori needed to start seeing less of her boyfriend.
Saori said nothing and just stared at the ground for a while. Then she raised her head and looked at Rumi. The intensity of her gaze made Rumi almost flinch. She felt a heavy sense of foreboding.
“I just... I’m going to give it up,” Saori said.
Niikura didn’t understand what she meant. “Give it up?... Give what up?”
“Trying to be a singer.” Saori moistened her lips with the tip of her tongue. “I give up. I quit.”
It took a while to register. Although she had heard the words, on an intuitive level she refused to understanding their meaning.
“What are you talking about?” Rumi’s voice was shaking. Her whole world had been turned upside down. “Quit? You’ve got to be joking.”
Saori shook her head. Her face was serene.
“I mean it. I’ve had enough. I want to take another path.”
“Another path? Apart from singing, what other path is there for you?”
Saori smiled tenderly. What she said next was a complete bolt from the blue.
“I’m going to be a mother. I’m going to have a baby and start a beautiful family.”
“A baby?” Rumi looked at Saori’s belly. “You’re not saying...?”
“Yes, I did a test this morning. It was positive. I haven’t told Tomoya yet. I’m sure he’ll be thrilled; he’s been after me to marry him.”
Saori spoke with vivacity, but what Rumi saw was a demented person. What was the stupid little girl saying?
“Hang on a minute, Saori. You need to think this through. Do you know what you’re saying? A baby... at a time like this... Why? You’re about to make your professional debut. This is the most important moment of your career...”
“Don’t you get it? I won’t be making any debut. You’re the one who doesn’t know what they’re talking about.”
Saori giggled. Being laughed at only made Rumi angrier.
“Do you seriously... do you seriously think we’ll let you do that? Have you no idea of what we’ve done for you? Everything humanly possible to turn you into a top-level singer — that’s what we’ve done. My husband sacrificed everything for you... Do you really think he’ll just roll over and abandon his dreams? Have you no respect for our hard work?”
Seeing that Rumi was genuinely angry, Saori apologized.
“I’m sorry. And thank you. I am grateful to both of you. I’m sure I can put this experience to use in other aspects of my life in the future.”
“I don’t care about your life or your future. What’s going to happen to our dreams? We’re the ones who took a chance on you...”
Saori frowned. “Isn’t that a bit weird?” she asked, tilting her head to one side.
“Weird? What is?”
“Why am I supposed to realize your dreams for you? Mr. Niikura is always telling me that I’ll succeed where you couldn’t. But I never signed up to provide a happy ending for your life story. I just wanted to sing, in my way and without any baggage. I think I’ve got every right to change course, if my own dreams change.”
Rumi glared at Saori. “You ungrateful little bitch, how could you...?”
“Fine,” said Saori, an icy expression on her face. “I’ll have a frank talk with Mr. Niikura. I’ll apologize to him. Or are you going to tell me to have an abortion? I’m warning you, that’s something I’ll never do.”
Rumi panicked when she saw Saori pulling out her phone. “What are you doing?”
“Like I said, I’m going to call Mr. Niikura. I’ll be completely up-front. I’ll tell him everything.”
“Wait, just hang on a minute.”
She made a grab for Saori’s phone. She didn’t want Niikura to have to hear this. She had to do something—
“Don’t do this. Please, let’s work something out. There’s got to be a way. Go ahead. Have the baby. Enjoy motherhood. Just, please, please, don’t give up singing.”
“Please, shut up! I’m not quitting singing because I have to. I’m quitting to follow another path that will make me happy. Stop shoving your dreams down my throat. Why should I have to work through your hang-ups for you? It creeps me out.”
They had both risen to their feet as they fought for the phone.
“Creeps you out?” Rumi’s eyes were wide open. “What do you mean...?”
“Exactly what I said. I feel like I can’t breathe. It’s like having a couple of stalkers watching every move I make.”
It was at this point that Rumi lost her capacity for rational thought. All the work that the two of them had put into the girl and she compared them to — of all things — stalkers!
“How dare you!” She shoved Saori backward as hard as she could. The girl’s heel must have snagged on something, because she just keeled over. Rumi heard a muffled thunk.
Expecting Saori to get back up, Rumi drew her hand back in readiness to fetch her an almighty slap on the cheek. That was how angry she was.
But Saori didn’t move. She just stayed on the ground, flat on her back, arms and legs splayed. Rumi called her name, peered into her face. Her eyes were half-open, but she didn’t respond, even when Rumi shook her. Oh God, no! she thought. She held her hand a little above Saori’s mouth. She wasn’t breathing.
At that moment, she realized what she had done.
She had caused Saori’s death. She had killed her—
Her mind went blank, then plunged into violent confusion. Barely aware of what she was doing, she ran away from the park. Her capacity for rational thought had deserted her; the only thing she could think about was how on earth she was going to explain what had happened to her husband.