“And?”
“And you were right, Hannah. Old Dr. Chase had prescribed herbs for Katie’s cramps. Frank found the notations on her chart. He says she induced her own abortion by taking two tablespoons of pennyroyal. Dangerous stuff. The usual dose is five drops.”
“Why didn’t she just pay for the abortion with the money Hal gave her?” Connie’s forehead wrinkled in confusion.
“I can guess,” I said. “She spent it all on the dress she wore to the dance. It was meant to dazzle Chip into bed.”
“How foolish and sad.” Paul slumped in his chair, his coffee forgotten.
“How about Liz? And Hal?” Connie wanted to know.
“Still no trace of Liz. But the divers found Hal in the boat.”
I set my mug down on the table, carefully, using both hands. My heart was thumping wildly. “Dead?”
“I’m afraid so. He had a life preserver on, but his foot was wedged in an opening in the bilge. Snapped his ankle.”
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. My hands trembled.
“And I think we’ll need to talk about this.” Dennis pulled a neatly wrapped package out of his pocket, placed it on the table, and unrolled it. It was the silver lure, its tail feathers ragged, but its barbed hook as bright, shiny, and sharp as the day Craig had bought it.
“It was the only weapon I had. I couldn’t think of anything else.” I looked Dennis in the eye. “Did I kill him?”
Dennis rewrapped the deadly lure and returned it to his pocket. “No, Hannah. Looks like he drowned.”
But I felt responsible, either way. Even if the lure hadn’t killed him outright, I was still the one who pulled the plug on Sea Song. I’d have to learn to live with that.
Paul rose and stood behind me, a hand on my shoulder. “My God, that was brave.”
“It didn’t feel very brave at the time. I was scared spitless.”
Dennis poured the coffee remaining in his cup down the sink. “You’ll need to come down to make a formal statement.” He handed the empty mug to Connie. “Both of you.”
Connie looked down at her bathrobe and turned her fashion-critical eyes on me. I must have been a sight in my paint-spattered shorts and a sequin-decorated ball cap perched sideways on my head. “Later this afternoon?”
“That’ll be fine.”
I started to panic. “You’re not going to arrest me?”
Dennis’s face broke into a huge grin. “Don’t be silly! We’ll probably give you a medal.”
Two weeks later, back in Annapolis, we learned that Liz’s body had been discovered by a crabber, caught in a trotline near the mouth of the Patuxent River. I sent a silent prayer to the Dunbars; I could only imagine their anguish at losing both their daughters, and under such horrible circumstances.
At the same time I called my daughter, Emily, in Colorado. I spent an afternoon rehearsing what I was going to say, but when she came on the line, my script flew out the window, I was so relieved to hear her voice.
“Hi, how’s it going, pumpkin?”
“Oh, hi, Ma. I’ve been meaning to call.”
Daniel’s business was going well, she told me. He’d hired another masseur and had completed a year’s training at the Rolf Institute in Boulder. My son-in-law was a certified rolfer, some sort of high-class masseur, I gathered, who could get away with being called simply Dante.
“And, Ma?”
“What?”
“I got a job, Ma.”
“That’s good news. What are you doing?”
“Working in a bookstore. Not one of those big chains. A little store. You’d like it.”
The old me would have mentioned all the money we’d spent on her Bryn Mawr education, just so she could follow some dropout to Colorado and work in a bookstore, but the new me bit my tongue. “I’m sure I would like it,” I said.
“Even has a cappuccino bar.”
“Now I know I’d like it.” I paused. “I don’t think the place where I’ll be working has a cappuccino bar.”
“Mother! I thought Dad said you were going to take it easy for a while.”
“I’m temping. The job doesn’t start until September anyway. I’ll be working for a law firm somewhere out on West Street, filling in for a secretary on maternity leave.”
“Funny you should mention that.”
“Mention what?”
“Maternity leave.” Emily giggled, then was silent. A light began to dawn.
“Emily! Are you pregnant?”
“Hold on, Ma. I’ve only just found out. Took one of those home pregnancy tests yesterday morning. Damnedest things. Pee on a stick and voila! If the double pink lines are to be believed, you and Dad are going to be grandparents.”
I counted on my fingers. “December?”
“That’s what I figure. A little Christmas package for the old parental units.”
I thought I was saying words like how wonderful and I’m so happy, but what came out was babble. When I could finally put two words together, I said, “Emily, I’d like to come and stay with you, to help out when the baby is born. If that’s okay.”
“I’d like that very much, Mother.”
Many minutes later, after we finally said good-bye, I levitated around the house, picking up newspapers, watering the houseplants, loading the dishwasher. Then I thought about Katie and the precious little life she had carried, both snuffed out before they had a chance to bloom, and I felt guilty about being so happy.
While I waited for Paul to get home so I could deliver the news that he was going to be a grandfather, I strolled down the block and around the corner to Maryland Avenue. At Aurora Gallery, I bought Emily an iridescent dragonfly pin, beautifully crafted by a local artist. As Jean was wrapping it up, I spotted a hand-painted tie. “And I’ll take that, too,” I told her. Forty bucks. What the hell, I’d send it to Daniel. “To Dan, with love,” I wrote on the card when I got it all to the post office. No way was I going to write “Dante.”
On May 22 Jennifer Goodall was graduated with the rest of her class. Paul delivered this news upon returning from graduation exercises at the stadium where the reporters were busy snapping pictures of the Blue Angels, the navy band, the president of the United States, and the hat toss, ignoring my husband for a welcome change. Paul hung his academic regalia in a plastic garment bag, zipped it up so hard that the bag tore, then placed a long phone call to his lawyer.
I was suspicious when I heard the news. “Did you change her grade? Pass her after all?”
“Absolutely not.”
“Well, how could she graduate then? Wasn’t it a required course?”
“Apparently the academic board waived the requirement.”
“Why? Was she a star athlete or something?”
“What a cynic you are! No, I suspect somebody browbeat the board. Maybe she cut a deal. Offered to drop the charges against me if the academy would allow her to graduate.”
“How do you feel about that?”
“Outraged. A number of us are planning to write letters of opposition, for all the good it will do. But I’m enormously relieved, and disappointed, too. Relieved that it’s over. Disappointed that the truth about her accusation will never be resolved.” He grasped my shoulders, searching my eyes for understanding. “I wanted to be exonerated, Hannah! I wanted you to know I’d been faithful. Beyond all doubt.”
Beyond doubt. My mother says I have to make up my mind one way or the other-either Paul slept with that woman or he didn’t-and then deal with it on those terms. Better advice than I got from the therapist, and about two hundred dollars less expensive, too.
Speaking of therapy, that’s how I ended up on the beach at Manchineel Bay, eating conch fritters out of a paper container resting on my stomach. Paul sprang the trip on me as a surprise. “I’m taking you to the Virgin Islands. No argument. I’ve chartered a sailboat out of Tortola.”