She turned her head to see Stephania standing there, her lips pinched together tightly, tears in her eyes.
Thanos gave Stephania a hard glare.
“The king needs to see you,” Stephania snapped.
“Can’t it wait?” Thanos asked.
“No, it is of an urgent matter,” Stephania said.
Thanos exhaled a slow breath, an expression of disappointment in his eyes. He stood up and bowed toward Ceres.
“Until next time,” he said, and marched back toward the library.
Feeling quite embarrassed, Ceres rose to her feet and was about to leave, but Stephania stepped in her way, eyes seething.
“You will stay away from Thanos, you hear? Just because you are dressed as royalty doesn’t mean you are one. You have nothing but commoner blood running through your veins.”
“I…” Ceres started, but she was interrupted.
“I know Thanos likes you, but soon he will grow tired of you the way he does every commoner. And once you have given him what he wants, he will throw you out of the palace just like he did the other girls.”
Ceres didn’t believe Stephania for one second.
“If he has so many other girls, why do you want to marry him?” she asked.
“I don’t have to explain myself to a lowlife like you. Stay away from my future husband, or I will find a way to make you disappear, do you understand?”
Stephania started back toward the library, but then she turned to face Ceres again.
“And just so you know,” she said, “I will be telling the queen about all that I saw.”
CHAPTER TWENTY TWO
Thanos paced nervously back and forth outside of Ceres’s door, his hands sweaty, his throat dry, his armor too restrictive and hot. Nothing felt right. Nothing was right. Although he realized he had no choice other than to accept his uncle’s orders, he knew Ceres would not understand and that she would be hurt and quite possibly hate him for it. And the worst part was, she would be in the right to do so. Even he despised himself for agreeing to do as his uncle had commanded, and he wished there was some way out of this nightmare of a predicament.
Thanos wiped the sweat beading on his brow, and cursed silently.
It was idiotic to pace about here like a drunken fool, he knew, for the king had commanded him to leave immediately, so there was no time. But Ceres deserved the truth from him even if it would cause a mountain of a rift between them. Even if his greatest fear came true – that she would never want to see him again.
Never.
He squeezed his eyes shut as the horror of that thought settled in. And then he realized there was another reason he was here. A huge part of him needed to see her again, in the event he was killed.
He shouldn’t think of matters he had no control over, he reprimanded himself.
He gritted his teeth and knocked on the door, and once the new handmaiden opened, he stepped inside.
Right when Ceres saw him, her face went pale.
“Thank you for freeing Anka and for allowing me to have her as my handmaiden,” Ceres said.
He glanced at the girl and nodded toward Ceres.
“Of course. Ceres, may I have a word?” he asked.
Thanos noted that Ceres’s shoulders went tense, and an unsettled look in her eyes verified she knew something was terribly wrong.
“Of course,” Ceres said.
“Perhaps we can take a walk,” he said.
They went into the hallway and climbed the stairs to the rooftop, a warm breeze tugging at his hair. From here, Thanos could see the entire capital, houses built as if on top of each other, and he could even hear the riots on the streets.
He stopped at the veranda and faced Ceres. She was so beautiful, he thought, her white dress blowing in the wind, her strawberry blonde hair moving with the breeze. But it wasn’t her beauty that made him adore her so. It was her thirst for life and learning, and the passion she carried for the people and things she loved.
He took a deep breath and looked her in the eyes before he spoke.
“King Claudius has ordered the royal army to annihilate the rebellion,” he said.
Her lips squeezed together ever so slightly, and she turned away from him, looking across the city.
“Was that what the note was about?” she asked.
“Yes.”
“And since you are in your armor, I assume you will be one of the ones enacting the king’s orders,” she said.
He didn’t want to say, the words feeling like molasses in his throat.
“I wish I didn’t have to, but I have no choice, Ceres,” he said.
“One always has a choice.”
Her voice was flat, but it was greatly constrained, he could hear, and he knew with certainty all she wanted to do was scream at him.
“How can you say I have a choice? You have no idea what it’s like to live beneath the king, his eyes always scrutinizing you, the threat of death always looming around the corner.”
“My brothers are out there!” she yelled, tears welling up in her eyes. “My friend Rexus. Will you kill them if you see them? Will you slay the very ones I love?”
His chest filled with a dull ache, seeing her upset, when all he wanted to do was to make her smile and make her feel safe.
“I realize you are angry – ” he said.
“Because they are my people!” she shouted. “They are your people, too, Thanos. Can’t you see you are fighting for a corrupt king, for oppression? Is that what you really want?”
Clenching his fist, he remained silent.
“You will be fighting against exactly what it is you yourself are trying to escape. Don’t you see?” she said.
He knew she was right, but he had to do this or the king would have no qualms about throwing them both back into the dungeon, like he had threatened when Thanos tried to object.
He gripped the railing, clutching until his knuckles turned white.
“I have to do what I don’t want to get the things I desire more.”
She stood rigid as a board, her beautiful emerald eyes widening, her mouth open in shock.
“What more could you possibly want than for your freedom and for the freedom of your people?” she asked.
“You!” he said.
Ceres’s eyes turned conflicted and tears welled up in her eyes. She exhaled a breath and gazed downward, wrapping her arms around her waist as if doing so would protect her heart somehow.
“I need to leave now. I just wanted to inform you where I went before I disappeared,” he said.
“Don’t go. Please,” she whispered, her hands falling limp at her sides, tears rolling down her cheeks.
“I’m sorry, Ceres. I have to.”
Her face morphed into a dozen shades of sadness and she let out a cry.
“If you do this, I won’t ever talk to you again,” she said, her voice shaky and not quite certain. “That’s…that’s a promise!”
He watched her run away, and although Thanos wanted nothing more than to go after her and take her in his arms, kiss her tenderly, he found his feet immovable. He stood quiet for a moment, anger and shame washing through him.
In order to save himself, he was about to give up all that he loved.
CHAPTER TWENTY THREE
Thanos rode toward General Draco, passing tent after tent, passing tens of thousands of Empire soldiers peppering the Alva Mountains, and he did nothing to hide the animosity in his eyes. The despicable general stood for everything that was wrong with the Empire. In fact, he hated the corrupt man just as much as he hated his uncle; perhaps even more. It was rumored, after all, that General Draco was the one who had killed Thanos’s parents.
Thanos finally arrived and dismounted his horse and strode across the scorched grass toward the silver-haired general. The middle-aged man stood in front of his tent, his red cape waving in the wind, a bandage wrapped around his muscular shoulder above his armor. He had been wounded yesterday when Blackrock Square had been stormed by the rebellion, Thanos had heard. If only that arrow had pierced his black heart.
“Come, my new lieutenant,” General Draco said.