“Say it, Paxton,” I quietly said through the reflection.
“You didn’t cry before.”
I turned to look at him with a frown. “I didn’t?”
“No. I never saw you cry until after the accident. I don’t like it.”
I smiled and walked to him, wiping lipstick from his mouth with my thumb. “I’m okay.”
Paxton kissed my lips and bumped his forehead with mine. “I love you Mrs. Pierce.”
I bumped his head back and smiled. “Come on. Let’s go meet this little guy.”
I had worked myself up about Mrs. Chadwick for nothing. She wasn’t the scary woman I thought she was going to be at all. She was a short round black lady, as jolly as St. Nick himself. Easier to talk to than the other two were. The interview was pretty much the same as what we’d gone through back in Florida. I presumed they were asking the same questions to see if they coincided with each other. I wasn’t worried about them finding a lie. We may have had skeletons, lies, and secrets, but our family wasn’t one of them. There was no denying how much Paxton and I loved our family, and there was no need for negating our love for our girls. It was heard through our words, expressed on our faces, and shined through our smiles when we talked about them. I was relaxed, my nerves settled into a peaceful state. Until the phone on her desk rang…
Plummet, straight to the pit of my stomach. That’s where my throat ended up, right before my heart heard the ring and joined in, beating clear out of my chest. I was about to hyperventilate and there wasn’t a thing I could do about it.
“He’s here,” Mrs. Chadwick smiled. “The Wagners would like to speak with you first. Is that okay?”
“That’s the people who want to adopt him?” I questioned, my voice shaking and eyes frightened.
“Yes.”
“What happens after this?” Paxton asked with the same nervous shake in his tone.
“Well, we need for all parties to agree. That’s what’s best for Vander. If neither party can agree, it’ll go to court, and in my seventeen years’ experience, I’m going to say you folks would win. It’s just so unnecessary for the child. I’m not saying the Wagner’s aren’t good people, they are, I’ve just never seen a child kept from a good family who wants them. Just remember, they love him, too.”
“I’m not going to tell them they can have him,” I assured her, determination expressed in my suddenly strong voice.
She nodded and stood, admitting her findings. “I didn’t think for a second that you would.”
Paxton and I looked at each other while we waited, watching while she waved them in. He squeezed my trembling hand, and pressed down on my bouncing knee.
“I can’t help it,” I whispered.
“Hello, I’m Rick and this is my wife, June. We’ve had Vander for a couple months now. We’re totally in love with the kid. He’s brought so much joy to our lives, and we love him so much,” the guy said, spewing word vomit all over us. A well thought out speech, a sales pitch. That’s what it sounded like. We both stood and waited for it to be over.
Paxton did the talking, omitting our names. They knew who we were. “Thank you for taking care of him. We appreciate it very much.”
The female gave her spiel next, and I did feel bad for her. Not bad enough to hand over my nephew, but bad. “But you don’t even know him. He’s never met you. We know his routine, and what he likes to eat, his favorite toys, and his favorite books. Please don’t take him from us. We can’t have kids. Vander was our first foster child, and we were adamant about only taking a little boy who was available for adoption. We just had to follow procedure and he would be a Wagner. He would be ours. Please. Please, don’t take him.”
I stepped around Paxton even with the attempt to hold me back with a straight arm. “You didn’t know him either. He’s my sister’s little boy, and I promised her I would take care of him. I love him, too, and I’m sorry that it turned out this way for you. I really am, but I will fight for him until my dying breath. I have to.”
The guy placed an arm over his wife’s shoulder when she nodded, a sad smile like she knew. “We brought all of his stuff. It’s not fair to Vander to go through a custody battle that we’re not going to win. Can I stay while he meets you? He’s a little shy around strangers.”
I turned to Paxton for the answer and he nodded, but Mrs. Chadwick stepped in. “Hold up. We need to talk about this. Gabriella, you look exactly like his mommy. I mean for a second I thought you were Izzy, trying to pull a fast one. If I hadn’t checked out your story and found your records from Fort Myers, Florida; I would have never believed it. I’m not sure how he’s going to react.”
“We talked to him about it,” Rick said.
Mrs. Chadwick walked to her office door again and waved her hand while Paxton squeezed mine. One would have thought I would be used to all the damn adrenaline rushes by now, but I wasn’t. I would never get used to that, the nerves that pumped ferociously through my veins, and then—it stopped. It all went away.
Vander let go of the lady’s hand and froze. Everyone froze. The world stood still while this little boy stared right at me, motionless, contemplating whether or not I was his mommy. I knelt on one knee and opened my arms to him, holding back burning tears. The only sound was his feet scuffing along the floor as he walked slowly toward me. I brought his little hands to my lips, trying like hell not to cry. He let me pull him into a hug, and even wrapped his little arms around my neck when I squeezed him.
“My mommy has my name on her heart, and a squiggly line from when I was born. It’s my heartbeat. You don’t have that, do you?” he asked, barely above a whisper.
“No, baby, I don’t.””
You’re Gabby, but you’re really Izzy, because you traded places with my mom because you’re brave. Where’s my mommy?”
That did it. I couldn’t help it. I pulled him closer to my body, feeling something cosmic, a phenomenon that I would never be able to put into words. I felt it, a pull so forceful it couldn’t be described. The same strong energy I’d felt the day I met Rowan and Phi for the first time. Even if I didn’t remember them, I loved them. Even if I never met him, I loved him.
“We’re trying to find your mommy, buddy,” Paxton said from my side. I hadn’t even noticed that he had knelt, too. Right beside me.
“Do you want to come and stay with us for a while?” Paxton questioned.
“I want to stay with June and Rick. I have to play soccer tomorrow.”
“Maybe you can call them later,” Mrs. Chadwick said from behind her desk when nobody replied. June sort of swallowed a whimper, but that’s it. I didn’t know what to say. Not a clue. “Gabby and Paxton would like to take you to lunch.”
Vander’s eyes perked up a bit, losing a little of the sadness. “And get a lobster?”
Paxton high-fived him with a loud, “Yes! Seafood, my man.”
Even with all the sadness, we all smiled, and Vander giggled, something between a cackling chicken, and a goat. Identical to Ophelia’s laugh.
“Wait, what does this mean? We can take him? He can go home with us?” I questioned when June’s words surfaced after all the commotion.
“It’s Friday. I’ll do my best to get the custody papers signed by the judge today, if not, it’ll be Monday. Can you stay until then?”
Paxton responded, coming to his feet. “No way. We have two little girls at home.”
“I can stay. You can go home if we have to wait,” I kindly offered knowing damn well he’d never let me stay there without him.
“No, where’s the judge? I’ll personally deliver them,” he countered.
“Let’s let Rick and June say goodbye to Vander,” she suggested rather than answering Paxton’s question.
I followed her out into the hall, watching behind me. Rick scooped Vander up, saying something about his swing, and to remember to choke up on the bat a little as the door shut. We all strolled down the hall and to a coffee pot. Paxton and I both declined.
“I’ll fax you the paperwork Monday morning. Have them notarized and sent back to me as soon as you get them.”
“We’re taking him home? Today?” I questioned with a point down, like the floor was today.