Next to the drummer, the sax player, and the smooth jazz singer, sat Sharon Archer, Nerdly’s wife. Her Hawaiian shirt was of the loose-fitting maternity variety and it hung loosely over her tremendous pregnant belly. Across the aisle from her sat Ted Duncan, the drummer they had used for the first two KVA albums. Ben Ping had been invited but had been unable to attend due to work. Phil, Laura’s best friend and roommate—and the singer in the band that Ted and Ben had formed—was present at the wedding but not currently seated. He would be standing in for Laura’s father and would walk the bride down the aisle. None of Laura’s family were present. None of them had even sent so much as a nasty note in response to the wedding announcement. Laura had not seemed terribly upset or surprised by this.
Beyond the seating area, just to the right of the covered table with the wedding cake and all the guest tables, was a small bandstand. A five-piece group of musicians—reputed to be the best wedding band on Kauai—were standing by. Their name was Hibiscus Dreams and their resume was impressive enough, assuming that any of it was true. Jake certainly hoped so. He was paying them five grand for this gig.
At a cue from Timmy the officiator, the band struck up a version of Bach’s Joy of Man’s Desiring using acoustic guitars and an electric piano. They were actually all playing in the same key and in reasonable harmony with each other. So far, so good.
A door opened in the building that led onto the beach and out stepped Celia, the maid of honor. She was wearing a maroon formal dress that fell to just above her knees and showed a respectable amount of her cleavage. She walked slowly down the aisle—Jake unable to help feeling a considerable tug of lust as he took in her form—and took up position on the other side of the officiator. She offered Jake a sweet smile of encouragement and then blew him a kiss.
The band then switched over to the Wedding March, this time using distorted electric guitars to play the melody.
“And now, friends and family of our happy couple,” said Timmy with a smile, “will you all please rise in honor of the bride.”
Everyone arose and turned toward the back. The door opened again and out stepped Laura Best—soon to be Laura Kingsley—accompanied by Phil. Phil was dressed in a tuxedo like Jake and Nerdly’s. Laura was in her wedding dress. It was a relatively simple frock, traditional white, that had been custom fit to her body. It outlined her trim waist and fell to mid-calf. Her breasts, not the largest in the world by any means, had somehow been made to look bigger than they actually were. She wore no veil, but her hair had been professionally styled by a man reputed to be the best hairdresser on Kauai. Jake thought she was breathtakingly beautiful. Based on the murmured comments he heard from the crowd, most of the guests did too.
The photographers snapped away and the band continued to play the Wedding March as Laura and Phil made their way to the pedestal. Laura looked a little nervous, but she steeled herself forward and took her position next to Jake on one side and Celia on the other. Phil, after answering Timmy’s question about who giveth this woman, peeled off and headed for a seat in the front, next to Jake’s father.
“You’re beautiful,” Jake whispered to her.
She blushed and gave him a smile.
The ceremony, at the request of both Jake and Laura, was brief. Timmy made a short speech about the sanctity of marriage and the bonds of love. Jake and Laura then recited the vows they’d composed for the occasion. They were your basic vows, touching but not earth-shattering. And they were brief.
“Now, if we can have the rings?” Timmy said next.
Nerdly produced the gold band that Jake had bought to go with Laura’s engagement ring. He handed it to Jake. Celia produced the diamond studded gold band that Laura had picked out for Jake’s ring. She handed it to Laura.
Timmy spoke a bit about the symbolism of the wedding rings, about the circle of love that could not be broken, about the nearly indestructible nature of the gold that made up the rings. Jake then placed Laura’s new ring on her finger, nestling it against the engagement ring.
“With this ring, I thee wed,” he told her.
She did the same with his, sliding it onto his bare ring finger.
“With this ring, I thee wed.”
Timmy then placed a wine glass before them. He reached into the podium and pulled out an opened bottle of Napa Valley Merlot that had been pressed in 1991, the same year the two of them had met. He poured wine into the glass until it was about half full and then picked up the glass and handed it to Jake.
“Drink now,” he said, “and seal the pact of your love.”
Jake put the glass to his lips and took a drink. The wine was excellent and went down quite smoothly. He passed the glass to Laura and she drank as well. They continued passing the glass back and forth until the wine was gone.
“And now for the fun part,” Timmy said with a smile. He took the glass from Jake’s hand and wrapped it in a large handkerchief. This, he then placed on the ground at Jake’s feet.
Jake smiled. “I’ve been looking forward to this part for months,” he said.
He stomped on the glass, shattering it.
“Mazaltov!” Timmy and the crowd hailed.
“By the power vested in me by the State of Hawaii,” said Timmy, “I now pronounce you husband and wife.” He patted Jake on the shoulder. “Feel free to kiss the bride.”
He took Laura in his arms and put his lips to hers, kissing her for the first time as his wife.
The guests cheered enthusiastically at the sight.
The reception began immediately on the large lawn adjacent to the beach. An open bar with two bartenders went into operation and the band started to play some lively music. Jake, Laura, Celia, and Nerdly, however, were not able to join the festivities right away. They spent the better part of forty-five minutes posing for pictures in every combination.
By the time they made it to the bar for their first rounds, many of the guests were already edging into the land of intoxication.
“Captain and Coke,” Jake told the male bartender, a dark-skinned mixture of Hawaiian and Chinese whose name was Tony. “Tall, and double on the Captain.”
“You got it, Mr. Kingsley,” Tony told him.
“Call me Jake,” Jake said. “My dad over there is Mr. Kingsley.”
“As you wish, Jake,” Tony said. He then turned to Laura. “And you, Mrs. Kingsley?”
Laura flushed a little at being called this for the first time. “That sounds so weird,” she said. “But so cool too. I’ll have a glass of chardonnay.”
“Coming right up.” Tony pulled down a wine glass and a water glass and went to work. As he put their drinks together, he nodded in the direction of the band. “You know, I’ve worked with Hibiscus Dreams at quite a few weddings, and they’re a good band, but today, they really seem to be outdoing themselves.”
“Is that right?” Jake asked. He had never heard them before today, but they did sound pretty good for a band that did nothing but wedding gigs.
“That’s because Sharon and I helped them with their sound check,” said Nerdly, who was waiting on an appletini from the female bartender.