Christy’s cheeks flushed with pleasure. “Thank you. I’d like to paint you for real sometime. And maybe sculpt you.”
“I’d like that.” Leah’s expression shifted, and she smiled wryly. “Do you ever draw Paul?”
“Of course. All the time, as a matter of fact.”
“Nude?”
Christy nodded, and I felt disjointed as the mood shifted from serious to playful.
“What about his dick?” Leah asked.
“What about it?” I said suspiciously.
“I’m just curious. I’d like to know how she sees you. I mean, are you, ahem, larger than life?”
“Oh my gosh, no!” Christy said. “He’s almost too big now. Besides, he’s the one who exaggerates his size.”
“What do you mean?” Leah asked, and she let Christy decide which question to answer.
“Only that he’s the perfect size. Well, perfect for me. Any bigger and I couldn’t deep throat.”
“I still can’t believe you can do that,” Leah said. “I mean, if I hadn’t seen it with my own eyes…”
“It took me a while to learn.”
“But now she’s world class,” I said. “Certified and everything.”
“Hold on,” Leah laughed. “Is there a world governing body I don’t know about? Do they have a committee to make rules for certification?”
“Of course,” Christy said cheerfully. “Linda Lovelace is the chairman—”
“Shouldn’t that be chairwoman?” Leah corrected.
“Oh, right. Chairwoman. Sorry.”
“Who else is on this committee? And what’re the rules?”
“It’s sort of like the military,” Christy said. “You have the CINC at the top, the Cocksucker in Chief.”
Leah’s eyes widened in surprise. She couldn’t suppress a grin, although she didn’t want to interrupt.
“Then on down through the ranks,” Christy continued. “You have the four-star and three-star cocksuckers. They’re like Admirals and Vice Admirals. Then you have the Rear Admirals.” She wrinkled her nose. “I don’t like anything to do with the butt, so I’m going to skip those ranks.”
“Of course,” Leah chuckled. “That’s your prerogative.”
“Exactly.”
“What’re you now? I mean, what rank?”
“I haven’t been doing it very long, so I’m only a Lieutenant Cocksucker. But I’m planning to make a career of it, so I’ll be promoted to Captain one day.”
“This sounds like a great TV show,” Leah said. “You know, one of those late-night shows on satellite, ‘The Adventures of Captain Cocksucker.’”
“I know, right!” Christy agreed. “Only, Captain Cocksucker needs a trusty sidekick.” She thought for a moment before she grinned broadly. “Commander Come-lover.”
Leah managed to keep a straight face, although I knew her well enough to see the laughter bubbling just below the surface. Then she straightened her back, put her hand to her ear like a radio announcer, and spoke into an imaginary microphone.
“They’re lusty ladies with a taste for testosterone, a penchant for penis, and a flair for fellatio! Tune in to watch their adventures as they suck the salty semen from every man they meet!”
“Yes, yes, yes!” Christy cried.
Their eyes burned with the fire of adventure before they collapsed in a fit of giggles.
“Oh my gosh,” Christy said at last. “I think I’ve met my match.”
“My partner in crime,” Leah agreed.
“Who needs Paul and Mark?”
Leah’s hand shot into the air. “I do!”
“Wait! I do too,” Christy said. “Mmm, speaking of which…” She looked at Leah. “Are you thinking what I’m thinking?”
“Commander Come-lover, reporting for duty!”
The little head snapped to attention. I got this.
* * *
Leah flopped to the bed and lay on her back. She stared at the ceiling and caught her breath, while Christy crawled up and nestled alongside me. I put my arm around her, and she sighed.
“That was fun,” Leah said.
Christy raised her head to look at her. “You aren’t upset?”
“What? That you didn’t share? Not really. Besides, you didn’t have much choice.”
Because I’d been holding her head down.
“I thought you were going to choke,” Leah continued. “How’d you learn to do that?”
Christy shrugged and rested her head on my chest again. “I just did.”
“I mean, don’t you gag?”
“When he comes? No, I just swallow normally.”
“Yeah, but his dick was in your throat. Like, all the way.”
“Mmm, I know.”
“Still, you don’t get to taste it at all.”
“I don’t care,” Christy said. “I… I can’t explain it.”
“You don’t have to,” Leah said. “I saw your face. I mean, you almost looked like you were coming too.”
“Um…”
Leah sat up in surprise. “For real? You came?”
“I almost always do,” Christy admitted, “especially when he shoots down my throat.”
Leah’s expression sharpened. “Can you come just from sucking?”
“No. I was playing with myself.”
“Ah, okay. I thought you might be like Linda Lovelace for real.”
“No,” Christy said, “my clitoris is right where it’s supposed to be.”
“Yeah, I know.” All of a sudden she laughed. “Why’m I not surprised?”
“About what?”
“That you know Deep Throat. I mean, you mentioned it before, but I guess I thought it was Paul’s influence.”
“No, he didn’t really watch porn before he met me.”
“I did, sort of,” I said, “but not really.”
“What else didn’t he do before he met you?” Leah wondered.
“Oh, lots of things,” Christy said.
“So, you aren’t going to tell me?”
“I didn’t say that…”
“Ha! Okay, we’ll come back to it,” Leah said. “Then, do you mind if I ask…? What’s a nice Catholic girl doing with a bunch of swingers? And practically engaged to one whose sister is more or less begging him to screw her!”
“Oh, that.”
“Yes, that,” Leah laughed. “I mean, we all thought you were a bit of a prude when we first met you—”
“I’m not.”
“No kidding. You corrected that misconception in a hurry. But it’s a bit of a stretch from swinging to incest.”
“What do you mean?” Christy asked cautiously.
“Well, that isn’t an adjustment you make overnight. I mean, I grew up with the idea that it’s okay to fool around with your siblings, as long as no one gets hurt. So did Paul, obviously. And Erin’s wanted it for about as long as I’ve known her. At least, since Paul stopped being a dork.”
“Wait,” Christy said, “Paul was a dork? He wasn’t always this cool?”
“Didn’t—?”
“She was changing the subject,” I said before she could get away with it. I squeezed her in reassurance. “You can tell her,” I said. “She’s one of the few people who understands.”
Christy fell silent for a long time, and Leah knew better than pressure her. Finally, she sat up.
“I’m gonna need a lot more alcohol if we’re going to have this conversation.”
“Good idea,” I said. “I think we could all use a drink.” I rolled toward the end of the bed and hopped to the floor. We kept our liquor stash in a cardboard box in the closet, but the current bottle sat atop the dresser with a pair of glasses.
“Sorry,” I said as I retrieved them, “we only have two.”
Leah didn’t mind. “You and I can share. I mean, if it’s all right with you,” she asked Christy.
“What? Oh, of course.”
“There’s a metaphor here,” I said, “but I can’t quite put my finger on it.”
“Funny, ha ha,” Christy said. “Now, hurry up and pour,” she added with uncharacteristic abruptness, “before I run screaming.”
Leah’s eyebrows rose but she didn’t say anything.