As I walked across the front of the garage towards the back door, I saw a little movement at the edge of my vision. I stepped back away from the corner of the garage and wondered if this was a new game Duke had learned. I wanted a little room if he decided to spring his trap. What I saw made me chuckle. Precious was crouched down, ready to ambush Duke. I was impressed that he was smart enough to circle around and come up behind her. He slowly stalked the unsuspecting cat. I was almost to the back door when he struck.
I give him high marks on his plan, but the execution needed a little work. I had just opened the back door when Duke rushed forward and nipped Precious on the butt. His momentum caused him to roll the now distressed feline. Duke broke for the back door to escape. It was like watching National Geographic when the hunting cat would flail away and make a giant swipe with their paw to bring down their prey. Precious made one of her loud yowls—which sounded like a bobcat—got lucky and sunk her claws into my pup’s rump.
Duke sensed his impending doom and sprinted through the back door with the crazed cat stuck to his butt. It was one thing to let the two of them play outside, but to let them inside was a very bad idea. I made it into the kitchen to the sounds of a major fight going on. I guess Precious took offense to being stalked. That was her job! It was also apparent Duke was pissed. I had never heard such ferocious growling.
Duke was now big enough to do some serious damage. I didn’t want to have to take an injured Precious home to Brit—for some reason, she loved that cat. I grabbed Duke’s collar and jerked him off the pinned feline, which gave her a chance to escape. Duke and I looked perplexed as Precious darted deep into the bowels of our home. He started wagging his tail because he was happy he was victorious. I hoped Precious wasn’t hiding because I didn’t have time for this mess.
“What the hell just happened?” Mom asked, and from her tone it was clear she wasn’t happy.
Mom was not in the mood for half a story. I explained my hero’s exploits in detail.
“So, you’re telling me the Callahan cat from hell is loose in my house?”
“We should probably go find her?” I suggested helpfully.
Mom glared at me, so I gave Duke the command to ‘get the kitty.’ It turned out either Duke was a terrible hunter, or Precious was the Queen of Hide-’N-Seek. We came downstairs to confront a pissed-off cat owner.
“What did you do to my baby?” Brit demanded.
“He and his hound chased her into my house,” Mom told her.
“Well, if she was scared, you won’t find her anytime soon. I’ll come by after school and get her when she comes out.”
“Sit down and have a doughnut,” Mom offered as she put a plate out with my Bavarian Cream on it.
THIS WEEK WAS JAM-PACKED with school activities. Wednesday was our last home baseball game and Friday kicked off the State Baseball Tournament. We had already locked in a slot, and the final home game would help decide our seeding. Then Saturday was Prom.
The word on the school grapevine was that ticket sales for Prom weren’t very good. The senior ass-hats had made this their big final party of the year, and frankly not many people wanted to join them in the festivities. Since ticket sales were so poor, our Prom had been switched from the Country Club to the gym.
If I’d known, I wouldn’t have bought tickets. I guess if I knew Harper would flake out on me, I wouldn’t have bought them, either. On Sunday, Sarah and I had locked horns. I refused to go to Wesleyan’s Formal this year. She finally relented when I explained I had no desire to run into Harper so soon after our breakup. Even though I wasn’t devastated, I didn’t need to see her there with Alex. My best guess was she wouldn’t take Alex, but why tempt fate? There was a high probability I might punch him if I saw him again.
The upcoming dance was the talk of our lunch tables. I quietly sat back and listened as I tried to figure out what was in today’s lunch. The sign said it was beef stroganoff. I always thought the dish was supposed to have a creamy sauce with sour cream in it and egg noodles. This tasted like they’d used canned turkey gravy and it looked like there were leftover spaghetti noodles mixed in. I was pretty sure it wasn’t even beef. I wasn’t eating this. I got up to go see if they had any sack lunches left.
“Where are you going?” Wolf asked.
“I’m getting something else.”
He smiled and grabbed my plate. I swear, he would eat anything. I went up and found the sack lunches were gone. I sweet-talked the lunch ladies into making me a Rueben. It was what they were having. When I came back to the table, no one was happy with me.
“How come you get special treatment?” Gina complained.
“Yeah, what’s the deal?” Alan asked.
I just glared at them. Pam and Mona were eyeballing my sandwich. If I engaged in conversation, the girls would end up talking me out of it. I just stuffed a big bite in my mouth and grinned at them. Pam and Mona made Gina and Jeff move so they could sit on each side of me. Wolf about lost his hand when he reached across to snatch some chips. Pam smiled at me, leaned close, sucked my earlobe into her mouth, and nipped me. The momentary distraction gave Mona time to steal half my sandwich. When I went to grab it back, Pam got the other half.
“Guys, no fair!” I complained.
“If you learned to share, you wouldn’t have these problems,” Wolf advised me.
“Shut up, I gave you my lunch already,” I said as he grabbed more chips. I was still hungry, so I would have to go back up and see what I could get. “Who all wants something else to eat?”
It seemed everyone did. I made Mona and Pam go with me to see if we could get sandwiches for everyone at our table. I explained to the lunch ladies that the girls had eaten my sandwich and everyone wanted something else to eat. Good looks and charm didn’t work this time. I paid one of the lunch ladies for a big loaf of rye bread, a couple pounds of Swiss cheese, sliced ham, mustard and individual bags of chips. She even threw in paper plates. For what I paid, I could have ordered everyone pizza and had it delivered. I think the lunch ladies made a profit on me.
“That’s more like it,” Alan said.
Pam made me a sandwich. I wasn’t taking a chance this horde of locusts wouldn’t eat it all before I got to eat. While everyone ate their sandwiches, Gina quizzed me about Prom.
“Are you and Harper renting a limo this year?”
“Harper and I broke up over Spring Break.”
“Oh please, don’t tell me we’re going to have to find you a last-minute date again,” Cassidy moaned.
Last year had been a disaster. Ford had set me up with a faux girlfriend for publicity. Between her dad, who tried to pimp her out, and her being a raving bitch, it had been a disaster. I ended up at Prom stag. I smiled when I remembered what had happened after Prom. If it worked out even half as good, I would have a night to remember.
“Settle down, I have a date lined up,” I assured them.
They all turned and looked at Pam. She gave a nervous laugh and waved her hands.
“It’s not me.”
“So, what did you do to Harper to make her dump you?” Alan asked.
“Alan, don’t distract him or we’ll never get the story out of him,” Gina warned.
“Can we have the leftovers?” a freshman from another table asked.
I looked around and everyone who wanted a sandwich had gotten one, so I let the freshmen take the rest. Lunch must have really sucked for them to be brave enough to come and ask for food. Then again, they were growing boys.