Zack was standing in front of the windows, looking out on the sun-beaten grounds. The sprinklers were going just outside, spraying the thirsty grass with water. I leaned against the bathroom door when I saw him, a smile spreading wide across my lips as I felt the wood of the frame through my bathrobe. “You’re watching sprinklers water the lawn instead of me in the shower?” My smile turned wicked as he spun to face me.
Zack was tall, at least six feet, which was a bit of a stretch for me. His hair was a darkish blond, and he usually wore a self-aware smile. He was impassive now, though, with a hint of hesitation. I didn’t like it when he wore that expression; it meant he had bad news. “I didn’t want to gawk.” I knew him pretty well by this point; he was my boyfriend, after all.
“You’ve got bad news?” I stepped out of the bathroom door, taking a couple steps closer to him, waiting for him to break it to me.
“I’d call it ‘disappointing’, not ‘bad’,” he said, crossing the distance between us and carefully placing his hands on my hips as he pulled me closer. He kissed me, but only for two seconds. After three, he’d stagger and get lightheaded. At five seconds, it’d start to burn. He broke away, but kept his hands where they were, avoiding any other flesh-to-flesh contact. The effect of my powers is cumulative, so if I kissed him again, it would start to drain him. “I have to cancel our date tonight.”
“Oh.” I tried not to show my disappointment, but it was definitely there. We had planned to go into Eden Prairie to eat at my favorite Greek restaurant, and after that see a movie. It was my favorite kind of date night.
“Kurt and I have to go to Michigan to track down a meta that’s causing a stir in Detroit.” He looked pained as he said it, his handsome face pinched with the regret of having to tell me. “Not sure when I’ll be back.”
“Hopefully soon?” He rested a hand on my shoulder and I wished I could pull him closer, kiss him again. And again. “Maybe tomorrow?”
He grimaced. “Maybe, but I doubt it. This one sounds complicated – a couple of assaults, a robbery. Might not be that quick.”
I rested my head on his shoulder for a second, smelling his cologne, then remembered my hair was wet and pulled away, my hand feeling the cloth of his black suit, where I’d left a damp spot. “I’m sorry.”
There was a twinkle in his eye as he laughed. “It’ll dry on the way to the airport, and if it doesn’t, I’ll probably be glad when Kurt and I have to haul our bags through the parking garage to the terminal. I don’t know if you noticed, but it’s kinda hot out there.”
I ran a hand through my hair, trying to untangle it. “I noticed. The most comfortable part of my training exercise was when I ended up having to drag Eve out of the creek.”
His brow lowered as he frowned. “Out of the creek? What happened?”
I felt my teeth click together and my jaw tighten. “I…um…kinda knocked her out of the air with a rock.”
“That must have been a helluva a rock.”
“It was a helluva throw, actually. The rock was just average.”
“It’s always a helluva throw if you’re doing it, Miss Meta.” He found his way back to a smile. “Why did you have to pull her out of the creek, though?”
I flinched at the memory of Eve, broken, lying on the rocky shore of the stream. “I kind of…broke her sternum…and ribs…and maybe fractured her skull a little.”
His right eyebrow crept up until it was an inch higher than the other. “A little? I’ve had a fractured skull before. It’s not a minor injury.”
“It was an accident. Things just got a little out of hand.” I took a deep breath.
He chewed his lip, opened his mouth and started to say something, then stopped. He blinked, then started again. “It wasn’t Wolfe?”
“Ugh.” I turned away from him, exhaling sharply. “Why does everyone keep asking me that? It’s not Wolfe, okay? He’s buried, safe and sound, way in the back. It was just me, slipping the leash a little, sick of training and thinking I was actually fighting someone. It’s kinda been a while since I felt a real threat and peril, you know.”
“Yeah, I know.” I felt his hand on my shoulder and it took everything I had not to put mine on top of his. Passing out on my floor wasn’t something that would make him very happy. “Not much longer and you’ll be done with training and into the real world.” I turned to look at him over my shoulder. “Then you’ll long for the good ol’ days of training.”
I hung my head. “I doubt it. I just wish things were easier sometimes.”
His eyes watched me. “With training?”
“Like…with everything. With training, with us…everything.”
“With us?” His hand dropped to his side and he cocked his head. “What’s wrong with us?”
“Let’s see…I’d like to be able to touch my boyfriend for more than two seconds without stealing his very soul.” I spat the words out like they were some kind of foul venom. He took a step back and I closed my eyes and took a breath. “I’m sorry. That’s my issue, not yours.”
He stared at me, almost a blank look, and I caught the subtle calm of his gaze. “No, it’s an issue for both of us.”
“Yeah, but it’s my fault.” The full meaning of his last sentence made its way through my warring emotions and I felt a sharp drop in my stomach. “What do you mean by that?”
He perked up, his mouth forming an oblong “o” as he recoiled slightly. “I…nothing.”
“It meant something.” I could feel the tension in my face. “It’s because we can’t—”
“No, I told you, that doesn’t matter—”
“It matters to you like it matters to every guy—”
“—there’s more to us than just—”
“ It matters! ” My shout ended his protest and he took another step back, as though he were afraid of me unleashing Wolfe on him. “It matters. I know it matters to you. I may have to wear heavy clothing but it doesn’t mean I can’t feel anything through them—”
“I was out of line.” He held up his hands. “We knew getting into this that it was going to be different, because you’re different. That’s not bad, it’s just…” His eyes went to the side as he searched for the word. “…really inconvenient at the end of the night.”
“Yeah. Well.” I looked at the floor. “You’re not the only one it’s inconvenient for.”
“I just meant that—”
“You think I don’t want to?” I was back on his eyes again and he grimaced, balled up a fist and looked away. “You think I don’t think about it all the time? You’re not the only one that feels the effects after a date. We can’t even sleep in the same bed without worrying that I’ll roll over and press my cheek against you in the middle of the night, making you another ghost in my head.”
“I didn’t come here to fight.” He was focused on me, his eyes earnest, face oddly blank. “I came to say goodbye. I have a plane to catch in an hour and a half.”
“Well, you better get moving, because the airport’s at least a half-hour away at this time of day.” I pulled my arms tighter against me and narrowed my eyes at him.
He started toward the door and I watched him go. He stopped and started to say something, his fingers and knuckles white as they held the edge. He made it through a half-spin and halted, and I heard him breathe deep as his head dipped down. Whatever he had on his mind didn’t come out, though, and after a minute he turned back and walked out the door, closing it much gentler than I would have expected.
My hand went to my forehead and covered my eyes from the light. I hoped he’d be all right on his trip, but I didn’t have the guts to call him and tell him that. I heard my smartphone beep – the one the Directorate had given me – and felt a thrill as I ran to where I’d left it on the desk next to the computer. I turned it on and swiped the screen to find I had a text message waiting. It appeared and I sighed – it wasn’t him. My eyes played across the words and my hand went back to my forehead, blotting out the light, as if that could make the world, all my troubles, and that damned text message go away.