"You bet," Jake said. "You got a pen and something to write on?"
He signed his standard autograph statement for both of them. Peterson then asked if he could get a picture taken with Jake. Helen, as she usually did in such circumstances, volunteered to snap the picture so Peterson and his wife could be in the shot together. In all, it was a fairly standard encounter with a fan. Unfortunately, while Jake was interacting with Peterson on the crowded platform, several other people had taken note of the conversation. Within seconds, word that Jake Kingsley (Yes, that Jake Kingsley) was standing up on top of the Eiffel Tower with them spread like wildfire. People began pushing toward him from all directions, asking for autographs, asking for concert tickets, asking to have their picture taken with him. It wasn't long before a few of the Intemperance-haters — there were always a few in any crowd — started to make their views known.
"What are you doing with him, hon?" asked one woman in her twenties of Helen. "Why would you be with a man who beats you?"
"He worships the devil!" yelled another man — this one in his mid-thirties. "I'd hate to be you come Judgment Day, sinner!"
This, of course, led to the inevitable exchange of words between the fans and the haters. The words quickly became heated and it only seemed a matter of moments before the physical violence began. And they were standing atop a tower more than a thousand feet in the air.
Jake tried to get them out of there at that point but the line to go down on the lift was just as long as the line to go up. So for twenty minutes they were crowded and pushed, taunted and yelled at, and forced to watch as two fistfights broke out on their behalf. And still people kept coming up and wanting to take pictures with him or have him sign an autograph. Even when they did get into the elevator, fifteen other people came in with them. Three of the fifteen were Intemperance-haters who continued to badmouth Jake's satanic ways and tell Helen what a dumb, hopeless slut she was for being with a man who beat her. Two were fans who carried on the tradition of getting in the faces of the haters. The rest were simple tourists who were getting much more than they bargained for when they bought their tickets to the Eiffel Tower.
Finally they made it back to street level and they practically ran away from the base of the tower, weaving and turning through the crowds until they were once more anonymous.
"Well," Jake said lightly once they were free. "That was fun, wasn't it?"
"Loads," Helen said sourly. "Let's do it again sometime."
Helen's irritation at having her trip to the Eiffel Tower disrupted by a melee of Intemperance fans and Intemperance haters lasted only until they arrived at their dinner destination that night. Jake used his celebrity status and the assistance of the hotel's concierge to secure them a 7:30 reservation at the Grand Vefour Restaurant, which was reputed to be the finest eatery in Paris. Located under the Palais Royal, the dining room was done up in opulent eighteenth century European décor. Large, gold chandeliers provided lighting to walls decorated with polished brass and large mirrors. The tables were of mahogany and covered with spotless white linens.
"This is definitely not Denny's," Helen said as they were led to their table near the center of the room by an actual snooty French maitre d.
"Nope," Jake confirmed. "This is at least up there with Black Angus."
Jake had tried to call Nerdly and Sharon to see if they wanted to come along for the experience, but they had neither answered their room phone nor responded to knocks on the door that connected Jake and Helen's suite with theirs. Figuring they must be engaged in the kind of activity that one did not like to be interrupted during, he had stopped knocking and now Jake and Helen were alone. They didn't mind. Grand Vefour was somewhat of a romantic restaurant anyway.
In all, dinner took the better part of two hours. The food was nothing short of spectacular, the service among the best Jake had ever experienced. They were served a six course meal heavy on fish and cream sauces and drank two bottles of Bordeaux chardonnay. With the dessert portion of the meal they each had a snifter of Napoleon Cognac (which Helen was starting to really develop a taste for). The bill for the meal was in Francs, of course, but if converted to American dollars it would have been $336.17. Jake paid it gladly and left a twenty-five percent tip.
They had planned to walk the district for a bit when they were done but the rain had started again and stifled that plan. Instead, they hailed a taxi and rode back to their hotel. Jake ordered two more bottles of expensive French chardonnay from room service and, while waiting for it to arrive, took off his suit and put on one of the hotel's robes. Once the wine was delivered he and Helen took off their robes and climbed into the hot tub in the middle of their suite. They sat there for almost an hour, drinking and talking, occasionally caressing each other or kissing.
About halfway through the second bottle of wine they couldn't take it anymore. Helen climbed on Jake's lap and inserted him into her body. They moved together slowly and passionately, enjoying the slippery sensation of the hot water and the oil that had been poured in it. Just as they were starting to really push toward the sizzling, raunchy part of the encounter, they heard frantic pounding on the connecting door.
"Jake!" Nerdly's voice yelled, sounding quite excited. "Helen! Are you in there? Open the door!"
"Shit," Jake said from around a mouthful of Helen's right nipple. "What the fuck does he want now?"
"Who cares?" Helen hissed. "Keep fucking me! We'll find out later."
"Right," Jake said, sucking more of the nipple into his mouth and increasing the rate of his upward thrusts.
Nerdly pounded on the door again and yelled out their names again. They continued to ignore him. Since they didn't hear any more knocks, they assumed he'd concluded they were either not there or busy and had given up. They were wrong. Just as Jake yanked Helen's head back by the hair and attached his teeth to her neck, just as Helen gasped out, "Oh... yes, fuckin' bite me! I love it!" they heard a gasp coming from the doorway to their sitting room.
They looked up and saw Nerdly and Sharon standing there, shocked and embarrassed expressions on their faces.
"Oh... oooh, uh sorry, Jake," Nerdly stammered. "You left the adjoining door unlocked so we..." He trailed off, his eyes riveted to Helen's tremendous breasts, which were dangling in clear sight.
Helen gave a little squeal and tried to slide under the water to cover herself. Unfortunately for Jake, his turgid manhood was still sheathed in her clenching womanhood. When she attempted this reflexive maneuver she didn't try to disengage from him first. This pulled the shaft of Jake's penis downward toward his feet, a direction it was not designed to be pulled in while in a state of tuminescence. A sharp, intense bolt of pain went shooting through his most sensitive part.
"Owwww, fuck... shit! Stop!" he yelled, physically grabbing her by the shoulders and pulling her back upward.
"What? Jake! My boobs are showing!" she yelled back, trying to push herself back down.
"You're breaking my fuckin' dick!" he screamed, grabbing her under the armpits this time and physically lifting her free of him. She launched high enough out of the water that the top of her pubis came momentarily into view before she splashed back down.
"Ohhh, god that hurt," Jake moaned, grabbing his rapidly wilting member to make sure it was still intact.
Helen quickly submerged her breasts and looked at him with concern. "What did I do, Jake?" she asked. "Did I hurt you?"
"You can't pull a dick in that direction, hon!" he said with a wince.
"I'm sorry," she said. "Are you all right?"
Nerdly and Sharon had watched this entire scene with wide eyes and rapidly flushing faces.