Dev was silent on the subject, and all those doubts Declan had placed in me came raging back to the surface. I looked down at Dev, who was obviously trying to get himself under control, and gave him an out. “If you’re tired of me, Dev, all you have to do is say so. I won’t cause you any trouble. I’ll just leave.”
“Tire of you?” His head came up, and I saw the tears he was trying hard not to shed. “I could never tire of you. I can love you. I can hate you sometimes. I can miss you when you leave the room for as little as five minutes. I can worship you. I can curse you because my life was easier before you invaded every inch of my soul, but I will never tire of you.”
I knelt between his legs and stared up at his face, touching the roughness of his dark beard. I wasn’t exactly innocent in this fight. “I am so sorry about last night. I should never have said that to you. It was awful, and I didn’t mean a word of it. I’m also sorry about today. I didn’t do it to hurt you. I love you, Dev. I love you and Danny, but I can’t live like this. I need you to trust me. I need to be more than just your mistress.”
“You died,” Dev whispered, leaning into my hand. “I still see it when I close my eyes. I fell to the floor and knew I was going to die and it hadn’t meant a damn thing because I could hear him killing you. Daniel can protect you. What the hell can I do? I’m utterly useless when it comes to Halfer. The only thing I can do is pay a phalanx of stronger men to keep you safe. Do you have any idea how that feels?”
“No,” I admitted. “Though I have nightmares about that night, too, and I know Danny does. We have to get past it. What does keeping me alive mean if I’m not me anymore?”
“I just wish I wasn’t so soft sometimes,” he said quietly.
“That’s why we train,” Daniel said, sitting down beside Dev. “You’re much stronger than you were before. It didn’t feel soft when you pulled me into the ground last year with all those freaking plants. We were on the Hell plane. There was nothing alive for you to work with. You have to forgive yourself. We have to move on. I’ve loved Z most of my life, and let me tell you, this is not the last time she’s going to pull this crap.”
“It’s not,” I agreed because Danny was right. I wished I was a different person sometimes. I wished I was simpler because most of the time when I got into real trouble, there was no one to blame but myself, but I knew I wasn’t going to be changing.
“She’s complicated and obnoxious, and she’ll make you completely insane,” Daniel explained. “And we’ll never get bored. We had a good six months of pretending to be in charge of this relationship. Well, the boss is back.”
Dev laughed and finally kissed me. “I have missed her.”
I pushed myself up against his lips, so happy to have them pressed to mine. They could complain about me all they liked as long as they kept me. I needed them so much.
“I really missed you, Z,” Daniel said with a sarcastic sigh. “I can’t tell you how happy I was you finally broke out of your funk. It’s been damn hard being the only guy in this relationship.”
“Danny,” I scolded him because the last thing Dev needed was that kind of teasing. He really could be sensitive about it.
“Oh, no, Daniel. I disagree.” Dev’s eyes took in the fact that I was only wearing a towel. “I don’t think anyone could look at those tits of hers and think boy. If being properly organized and giving a crap about the way I present myself to the world makes me feminine in your eyes, then so be it. But let me assure you, if I’m female, I’ll be coming out of the closet because I’m definitely a lesbian.”
Dev reached out and suddenly I was no longer wearing that towel. Cool air caressed my skin, but I was heating up because of the way they were both staring. He tossed the towel aside and took a moment to let his eyes roam my body. “I believe we had an arrangement before, lover. Do you remember it? I was more than willing to concede the reins of our relationship to you as long as I maintained a certain level of dominance in one very specific place.”
Dev liked to be in control in the bedroom. He liked to play certain games, and we hadn’t done anything like that since bringing my husband into the relationship. I have to admit everything female in me tightened at the thought of Dev taking control again. Sex had been good the last six months, but Dev had allowed Daniel and me to explore what we were willing to do together. The boundaries had yet to really be pushed. As I gazed into those green eyes, I realized he was done with going with the flow.
Dev was going to take charge.
Dev stood up and before I could protest, I was in his arms. He tossed me on the bed. I tried to scramble up but found myself tangled in green vines that shot out from the walls to hold my arms. Another pair of snaking vines appeared at the end of the bed, wrapping themselves around my ankles. The lush ivy held me tight, and I couldn’t stop the startled cry that sprang from my lips as I was spread in a wanton fashion across the bed.
“Now, my goddess,” Dev drawled as he and Daniel looked down at my body. Dev’s eyes were hot, and there was no mistaking the erection he sported. “You were a bad girl today. You caused an enormous amount of trouble. Did you think you could get away with it? It’s time to discuss your punishment.”
Chapter Ten
“God, she looks hot.” An expectant grin lit Daniel’s face as he stared down at me.
“She does indeed.” Dev watched me struggle against the bonds. They caused me absolutely no pain but held me tightly. I wouldn’t be going anywhere. My skin was already getting hot under the boys’ scrutiny.
My arms were held over my head. Cool green ivy rolled over my skin, gently forcing my hands toward the headboard of our enormous bed. Vines had sprouted from somewhere under the bed and wrapped themselves around my ankles, spreading my legs wide.
“I’ve always liked this room.” Daniel winked down at me. “Now I know why.”
I knew why. Because we shared it. Because it was ours. All of ours. The last seven months had been the best of my life in some ways. In others ways it had been difficult, but I knew now that I wouldn’t have really walked out the door. I couldn’t have. I loved these men. I would fight for myself, but I didn’t think I could leave them for any reason.
From my right side, a marigold snaked its way across the bed. It was gold and yellow, the bloom as big as my palm. Dev’s control had grown over the last year. Since that night in Vegas, his control of his magic had grown in leaps and bounds. The marigold was from the front hall. Dev had drawn it in, pulling the flower from the pots that lined the entryway. Soft petals caressed my skin. Dev flicked his hand and the marigold brushed across my breast.
“We should talk about the new protocols,” Dev said. The silk from the bloom trailed to my other breast, lighting up my skin. Already I could feel Dev’s magic beginning to flow like a warm wave of lust.
My pussy was getting wet and he wanted to talk security protocols? Maybe we weren’t done fighting yet. “If you think you can get me hot and bothered enough that I’ll agree to anything you say, you’re probably right, Mr. Sex God.”
A sexy smile curled his lips up, and he reached out to tweak my nipple. After the softness of the bloom, his fingers were a little flare of sensation that went straight to my pussy and had me gasping. “I’m glad that you admit how good it can be, but I wasn’t going to force you to agree to anything.”
Daniel’s eyes were watching the marigold as it started down my torso. “He’s smart enough to know that after the sex you would start yelling. Well, I’m smart enough to know it and he’s decided to listen to me. Are you going to set that thing on her pussy?”