“Max has a cleaner?” I blurt.
Danny laughs. “Okay, um, I was supposed to keep that to myself!” He looks sheepish.
I sip my drink and think about the house again. It was beautiful, perfect really. As bad as I would feel for the house, it would be amazing to live there. A cleaner would help but…this brings me back to my first question. “How could we afford it?” I ask. “Do we need such a big place? Shouldn’t we stay here and save some money first? I hardly have any savings, I put it all into here.” Panic begins to rise again.
“Let’s start again shall we?” Danny says, taking my hand and sitting straighter. “I shouldn’t have started this with the punch line, I’m way too impulsive, sorry.” He smiles his shy smile, so I try, really try, to relax my nerves and hear him out.
“I was thinking, maybe we could buy a house together, what do you think?” he says, carefully.
I nod slowly. “Okay, it might be worth some consideration.” I smile, playing the game… “What did you have in mind?”
“Well I’ve seen a place on Max’s street. It has been completely renovated. It’s crazy cool and I really love it,” he replies, his boyish grin returns as he pictures the house.
“Sounds expensive, how would we afford it? I’ve been putting all my money into this place and although we could probably get a mortgage, do we really want such high living expenses when we have virtually none right now?”
He positively beams. “Okay, well…I know how independent you are, but please hear me out.” I tense, because I can guess what’s coming. “I’ve been saving for a really long time. I’m an only child and my parents aren’t short of a buck so I had no debts from school. I had a cheap apartment and simple lifestyle. My job pays well and while I’ve slowed down a little and just pick up a few big jobs a year now, I worked my ass off in the beginning. It has been kind of easy to put money away.” He shifts in his seat. “And I sold the Shelby,” he murmurs. I almost miss it. Then he adds, “and you wouldn’t believe for how much.”
I blink. “You sold the…Danny, you loved that car!”
“I love you more.”
“But…”
“But nothing. I wasn’t going to ship her and I’m not going back. Anyway, it turns out she was a great investment. I had my fun and now I have a nice pay out. Win, win. I have enough saved that we would only need a small mortgage to afford it, it would be manageable.” He squeezes my hand. “That was until I talked to my dad last night.”
I look at his eyes, they are wide with excitement.
“I didn’t realise, but Dad sold his parents’ place here after Pops passed away about four years ago…and he kept the money aside…for me!” He’s giddy now. “We can easily afford it!”
“Whoa!” I breathe. I take a minute, I don’t want to kill his buzz…but there is no way he’s buying us a house solo.
Chapter Nineteen
Liv
Two sounds perfect.
“Danny, you know I can’t let you use all of your life savings and bring nothing to the table. That’s your money.”
“It’s our money, Liv.” He gives me a stern look. “I’m serious.”
“God Danny, you don’t know what you’re saying.” I rub my forehead. “There’s so much we haven’t talked about. You can’t just go off on the ‘What’s mine is yours’ speech.”
“Liv, think about why I have all that money, why I haven’t settled down. Consciously or not, I was holding out for you. That money is our future, alone I don’t need it. Without you I…I want to share it with you, that’s it. Sorry, but like it or not, what’s mine IS yours.” He runs his thumb across my knuckles.
I watch him carefully, he’s so serious, I almost want to laugh. I’m really trying to loosen up, but this..?
“I can’t leave the money sitting there, it’s too much, I need to invest it in something. A house is a reasonable investment isn’t it?” He thinks for a minute. “If we stayed here forever, I would be living in a house you own. I want to have a home with both our names on the deeds. I want to do this for us, I’ve waited half my life for an ‘us’ to do it for.” He studies his fingers, then looks up at me and seems more sure of himself. “Besides, how would we manage in the flat with a baby?”
My heart misses a beat. “I…I thought…I…I didn’t know if that’s what you wanted anymore.” I manage to stutter out.
“Of course it’s what I still want, you goof!” his shy smile reappearing. Then it falls. “Unless you’ve changed your mind.”
I shake my head slowly, my own shy smile growing.
“Good. So you see why we need the extra rooms?”
“But four?”
Danny laughs. “Maybe two. We can keep the other rooms for Jen and your sister when they visit.” He looks at me with such hope.
“Two sounds perfect.” I smile. Danny wraps his fingers into mine and we sit quietly, digesting this new turn in the rollercoaster of our lives.
“Before, in LA...” Danny interrupts, “…when we talked about, you know, a family.” He fidgets. “We said soon.”
“Yeah, we did,” I reply, feeling the flutter of nerves in my stomach begin again.
“That was almost four months ago.” He hesitates. “So…is now too soon?”
My heads starts to shake slowly, involuntarily, before I even really process it. “Not really,” I admit, although I’ve tried not to think about it too much.
“I was thinking now that you’re getting better…I mean your body can probably spare the calcium.” He smiles.
“Is that what you were waiting for?” I laugh.
“Yeah, well, I guess. I would have suggested it sooner, but your bones were healing. I figured it could wait.”
“And now?”
“Now…I badly want to get you pregnant.”
A thrill shoots through me and I’m sure my cheeks flush.
“Whenever you’re ready, that is.” He adds.
“I’m ready.” And like that, I know I am. I want it all with him. I know I’ve forced myself not to hope too much, but this isn’t a vain hope. It’s being offered, something tangible and it makes me so happy. He still hasn’t mentioned marriage, which feels okay with me. I tried not to think too much about that either, but the future together and a family, that is all I ever wanted with him. Marriage wouldn’t make us complete, but I know a baby would.
“So will you let me buy us a house?” he pleads.
I turn to face him again. His eyes fixed on me in anticipation. He wants this so much. He wants to be the provider. Even my deepest urges to resist this can’t deny him. “Okay.” I nod taking his hand again. “But, you have to accept that it works both ways. What is mine is yours too.” His smile is the most perfect I’ve ever seen.
He pulls at my hands until I lift up out of my seat and fall into his lap.
“I love you so much.” He breathes into my ear as his arms hold me tight. A shiver runs down my spine leaving all of my hairs standing on end. If this is all it takes to see that expression on his face, he can buy all the houses he likes and I’ll fill them with children. My stomach flips at this thought. It’s primal and almost against everything I thought I believed, but I want so badly to be pregnant for this man.
He sighs long and loud. “You have no idea how happy you’ve just made me.”
“I think I do. I feel the same way.” I grin. A contented silence seems to fall on us. My thoughts wander to us in that glossy house. I’m not, well, glossy in the slightest, but I can envisage how it could accommodate my individuality…OUR individuality. I would enjoy the challenge.
“We can look at other houses if you like.” Danny interrupts my thoughts.
“I was just starting to picture us there.” I smirk.