When they had cleaned as many as they could, there was still a whole bucket of fish left over; they put those in the tank, a holding area that had been built inside one of the stone chests on the jetty. It served as an aquarium where the fish could live for a few days after they’d been caught. It was a very practical feature that had been part of the jetty for as long as Nora could remember.
The grilled perch with new potatoes and chanterelle mushrooms fried in butter made a perfect summer meal. Nora set the table in the garden so they could make the most of the fine evening.
Henrik didn’t want to drink wine as he was going out sailing, but Nora had a glass of golden Chardonnay. They had strawberries and ice cream for dessert.
Now they were sitting over a cup of coffee; it would soon be time for Henrik to make a move. There were still several hours to go before sunset. The pennants that had been fluttering proudly in the breeze earlier in the day were now drooping. The bumblebees were buzzing. The boys had gone over to see their grandparents for a while, so Nora and Henrik were alone.
It was time to talk.
Nora turned to him. “I’ve got something to tell you. I hope you’ll be pleased, because I think it’s really good.”
She reached out and squeezed his right hand.
Henrik took a sip of his coffee and looked at her with curiosity. “Sounds good. I’m all ears.”
Nora decided to ignore the anxiety in her chest and made an effort to sound as positive as possible. “When I was in town yesterday I took the opportunity to meet up with that recruitment consultant I told you about. We had a really good talk. The job sounds fascinating. Just the kind of challenge I want. And the idea of getting rid of my useless boss . . . no more Ragnar!” A smile crossed her face as she described the meeting and the questions that had come up. As she was talking she waved her hands. She couldn’t help getting excited, and the words came more and more quickly.
Until she noticed that she wasn’t getting any response.
Henrik hadn’t said a word.
When Nora stopped talking, the silence hung heavily between them.
At last Henrik said, “You mean you went and met him behind my back?”
Nora stiffened. Henrik’s voice was ice cold, and he was sitting with his back straight, looking at her as if they hardly knew each other.
“I wanted to meet him first to see if there was any point in bringing it up with you again.”
“Like I said, behind my back.” The words sounded like the crack of a whip.
“There’s no need to take it that way. I decided to meet Rutger Sandelin before I told you. Is that so terrible?” A huge lump was forming in her throat.
This wasn’t Henrik, her husband, sitting opposite her. This was a stranger. A stranger with black eyes and a condemnatory expression.
“I won’t have this,” he said. “If you think you can play fast and loose with this family just to fit in with your career, then you’re mistaken.”
Nora swallowed. Her stomach was contracting, and a quiver of fear slithered through her abdomen and into her throat. She had assumed he would be surprised that she’d met the consultant, but she had been sure they could talk it through. How could he react like this? “You can’t forbid me from seeing anybody I want to see.” The words came out more sharply than she’d intended, like an insolent child.
“I can do whatever I like, since you seem to think you can do whatever you please without a thought for anything other than your fucking job.” Henrik was furious, his lips white. “I want nothing to do with this. I’m incredibly disappointed in you. How selfish can you be? You’ve got two children; have you forgotten that?”
“So have you,” Nora said. “But you can go sailing for hours on end—that’s perfectly all right—while I try to cope with everything else.” She got up so fast that the chair fell over. “How can you say that? You should be proud of me. Pleased that someone’s offered your wife an exciting job.” She took a deep breath and tried to control her voice, which was threatening to crack. “Instead you’re just being nasty.”
“I’m trying to take care of what we have. And look after the best interests of our children. But you’re behaving like a spoiled brat who doesn’t get her way. We’re not your puppets. You can’t pull our strings just because it suits you.” He folded his arms across his chest and looked at her. The muscles in his arms were tense, his fists clenched.
Nora looked at him in distress. In vain she looked for a shred of understanding on his face. Some sign of the Henrik she loved.
The Henrik who was her husband.
He looked at his watch and got up from the table. “I have to go or I’ll be late.”
Nora couldn’t speak. There were no words. She hated the thought that he was going to leave without them making peace, but she just couldn’t continue the conversation with him. She was torn between her desire to let the anger take over, to scream at him to go to hell, and the realization of how terrible she would feel if he simply left without some kind of reconciliation.
Reason won over rage, with some difficulty. She bit her lip, then took a deep breath. Little more than a whisper came out. “You can’t just leave like this.”
“I don’t think we’re going to get much further. I have to be there on time,” he said with suppressed fury.
“Henrik.” The name came out like a sob. “You have to stay—we have to talk this through.” Her voice was shaking with the effort of keeping it under control. She took another deep breath and smothered the sob that was on its way. All of a sudden it was very important that she didn’t start crying.
The distance between them was terrifying. Impossible to cross.
An empty glance was his only response.
The man who had promised to love her for better and for worse walked into the house. She watched him pick up his things and his life jacket from a hook inside the door. When he came out again he made a point of changing the subject, without looking her in the eye.
“Say good-bye to the boys for me. I’ll be back around midnight tomorrow, if the wind is with us.”
He barely paused; she only registered the words when he had already passed her.
“I have no desire to talk about this matter any further. The discussion is over. You need to pull yourself together, Nora.”
He opened the gate and left the house with rapid, determined steps. As he was walking, he shrugged on his life jacket. His kit bag swung in time with his steps. He didn’t look back.
Nora stood in the garden and watched him go. The tears were building up in her eyes. She dashed them away with the back of her hand.
If the boys hadn’t come running at that very moment, she would have broken down completely.
CHAPTER 63
Nora was sitting on the veranda. She had put the boys to bed and was trying to work out what had actually happened between her and Henrik. She couldn’t remember the last time they’d had such a serious falling-out. She had never felt so unhappy in her marriage, not even when things had been at their most difficult, when the children were small and Henrik was working night shifts.
How could something that had started with such a positive piece of news turn into such a crisis?
She thought about calling Thomas but didn’t want to bother him with her marital problems, even if she had known him for many years. Besides, he had his hands full with the murder investigation and had been completely worn out the last time she’d seen him.