But I thought of the village Jax and I had entered, looking for food. It had been empty. Desolate.
“I don’t know how I can reach him,” she said. “At the moment, going that far inland is too dangerous. Not knowing if he’s all right is the worst thing. It’s driving me crazy with worry.”
I guessed this was where I was supposed to pat her on the shoulder and say, “I’m sure everything will be all right,” but we would both know how false that platitude was. Instead, I offered her a weak smile and asked, “What are your plans now that the Survivor Radio mission was successful?”
“We want to find Apocalypse Island,” she said. “It was always our plan. If they have some kind of vaccine that actually works, we need to make sure it reaches everyone and not just the authorities.”
I raised an eyebrow. “You mean you’re going to steal it from a government facility?”
“If that’s what we have to do. It’s not just the vaccine; they must be working round the clock on other things too. What if they have a vaccine that makes you invisible to zombies like in World War Z?”
I rolled my eyes. “I think if they had that, they’d be using it by now, don’t you?”
“Okay, so not that in particular but they must be working on other things.” The tears were gone from her eyes, replaced with an enthusiastic brightness. I understood then that people like Jax, Tanya, and Sam needed a goal at all times. They were goal-oriented and without that part of their personality being fulfilled, they would probably go as crazy as the feral survivors on the beach.
Although we had banded together, I was the polar opposite from them in a lot of ways. Once I was reunited with Lucy and Joe, I would be happy to take The Big Easy out into open water and live a carefree existence on the waves. Fishing. Reading. Listening to music. I could happily adjust to that life while others took responsibility for rebuilding the country from the ashes of the apocalypse.
“What about you?” Jax asked. “What are your plans?”
“Right now, I just need to be reunited with Lucy. After that, I’ll take it one day at a time.”
“So when we get to the lighthouse, we’ll be going our separate ways,” she said.
I nodded then asked, “What about Johnny? Is he happy to go on a search for Apocalypse Island with you?”
“Yeah. After his experience at the hands of the authorities, he wants to do anything he can to get back at them.”
“Cool. It’s weird but I kind of miss hearing him on the radio.”
“Me too.”
I stood up. “I guess we should get moving. The sooner we get to the lighthouse, the sooner you can start your search for Apocalypse Island.”
She smiled and touched my arm. “Thanks for the chat, Alex. Talking to you always cheers me up.”
I walked to the bridge ladder wondering if I had mastered the art of conversation… or at least mastered the art of withholding the truth. If I had told Jax what I really thought, I wouldn’t have cheered her up at all. Her boyfriend was probably dead and they were crazy to think they could go to Apocalypse Island and set foot in a government facility, never mind steal a vaccine from there and live to tell the tale.
There was a big difference between breaking into a radio station and entering a government facility. The place was sure to be heavily-guarded and not in any half-assed way like the radio station had been.
I was glad I had cheered Jax up but sad that I’d done it by being dishonest.
As I sat in the pilot’s seat and started the Lucky Escape’s engine, I wondered if I was being dishonest with myself. I had sent out my message on Survivor Radio but there was a good chance Lucy never heard it. We had the radio on nearly all the time on The Big Easy but for all I knew, Lucy wasn’t even on the boat any longer. There had to be a good reason why she had left me at the marina and it might be that she was taken by the army. They were all over the marina on that foggy day.
My hopes of meeting Lucy at the lighthouse could be nothing more than a mental survival mechanism, the same way Jax and the others had their goals to keep their minds focussed on something other than the hell around us.
What would happen if Lucy didn’t turn up? I would never know what happened to her. Would the mental strain eventually send me into madness like so many other survivors?
As I turned the boat south and headed for Land’s End, the song on the radio finished and a voice came over the airwaves. Male and smooth and with a mid-Atlantic accent, it said, “Hey, folks, this is Nick Tucker, the new voice of Survivor Radio. We’ve got lots of great music for all you survivors out there. Don’t touch that dial.” Evanescence’s “Bring Me to Life” started playing.
The army had replaced Johnny Drake quickly.
The world moved on.
thirty-one
Two days later, we reached the lighthouse. It was mid-afternoon on a cool but sunny day when the rocky island and the lighthouse came into view through the bridge window. Seagulls and crows circled around the island and perched on the railing I had once jumped from to save my life.
Elena had not made that jump.
The tide was in at the moment, so the island was cut off from the beach by a strip of seawater. When the tide went out, a rocky causeway beneath the water would be revealed.
Zombies staggered around both on the island and on the beach. I wanted to take my bat and smash the head of every last one of them.
As we sailed closer, I could see black scorch marks on the rocks where Mike had crashed Harper’s boat. Pieces of burnt wood were jammed between the rocks near the water’s edge. Charred bodies lay in a blackened mess. Mike’s death had been such a waste.
It wasn’t until Jax appeared at the top of the ladder and said, “Hey, Alex, we’re at the lighthouse. Are you okay?” that I felt my throat hitch and tears sting my eyes.
She came up onto the bridge and put an arm around me. “Hey, it’s okay. I’m sure they were great friends and coming here is going to make their loss all the harder. You come down to the living area and have a cup of tea while we wait for Lucy to arrive.”
I dropped the anchor and killed the engine. When the rumbling of the engine died, I could hear the distant low moans of the zombies by the lighthouse.
In the living area, I sat on the seat by the window, looking out over the calm sea. Sam handed me a mug of tea and when I took it from him, I noticed my hand was shaking. What if Lucy never showed? How long would we wait before we moved on and I never saw her again?
The tea was hot and sweet as it burned down my throat. I placed the mug on the coffee table and resumed my watch out of the window.
Johnny spoke. “I’m sure she’ll come, Alex. You just have to give her time, my friend.”
They all knew that Lucy and I were close friends but I hadn’t told them just how much she meant to me. I hadn’t even admitted to myself how deep my feelings were.
If Lucy didn’t arrive, I wasn’t sure I could go on without her.
Jax sat next to me. “We’ll wait here as long as it takes, Alex. We’ll—”
“She’s here!” I said, getting up and going to the aft deck. I had seen a boat approaching from the north and I knew it was The Big Easy. I recognised her like an old friend I had not seen for too long.
I reached the aft deck and leaned out over the rail. She was coming slowly along the coast, close to the rocks. If the tide was out, she would be too shallow, in danger of grounding herself on the bottom. Lucy knew better than that. What was she doing?