I felt a sharp poke in my back and whirled my head around to see what was going on behind me. Frank nudged me and pointed a finger to the door.
Night ruined. Sophia had just walked in with a bunch of others suits from the office, including Kevin. Ugh. This bar just got trashy. Frank rubbed my arm and whispered in my ear, “Come on, let me get you out of here. I’ll drop you off at home, beautiful.”
“Yeah. I guess so. Let me just use the restroom and we can go,” I answered with a sigh.
Mandy looked up from Evan's gaze. "What, you're leaving? Really? Now?"
I nodded my head toward the door and stood up. “Yeah. Going to hit the restroom alone and then go. I don’t feel up to that tonight.” I slid my purse off the table without looking at anyone and walked to the back of the crowded bar where the bathrooms were. I didn’t really need to go. I just needed a minute—maybe splash some water on my face or something. It was humiliating enough to be cheated on right before your wedding—seeing them together and her smug look of triumph wasn’t something I wanted to give her power over. So I pressed cold water on the back of my neck for five minutes to gain enough sense to go back out there and deal with whatever they would try to mortify me with.
As soon as I exited the bathroom, a large, warm body had me pressed into the wall. Jameson’s face dipped into the curve of my neck and his hot breath wrecked havoc against my ear. "You're going home with someone else?" his voice was nothing but a deep, hungry growl.
“It’s Frank. I’m not going home with him. He’s just going to drop….”
“There’s no way I’m letting you leave with him,” he growled, again. What’s with all the growling?
“Fuck you. Fuck you and him and her. I can leave this bar with anybody I want to. What if I want to be just like the rest of you and not care where my vagina wakes up for once? I want to not care and just have fun, just do something wild, like he said I never did, the reasons he screwed someone else behind my back.” Well, there went some more verbal vomit I was always trying to filter.
“Is that what you want? Tell me want you want,” he demanded, leaning his body way too inappropriately close for a boss to be.
I tried to lift my arms to push him off me, but the minute my hands touched his chest they had a mind of their own, gripping onto his shirt and pulling him closer. “What is it you want?” I asked him back.
“You, I just want you.” His face brushed against mine, his cheek to mine, and his hands fell heavily to my waist. Fingers dug into my skirt, pressing into my hips and holding me tighter against the wall.
“Tell me what you need, Lex.”
More unfiltered babble started pouring out of the giant, gaping hole in my face. “This morning I walked into the fucking lounge where your ex was dry humping mine after he spent the night on the phone trying to tell me how sorry he was, again. How we should still get married, because he still loves me.” It was so stupid to still be harping about. So stupid. I didn’t want to be faced with it anymore and I didn’t want to talk about it anymore. I slid my sweaty palms down my skirt then back to his shirt and just looked at him. He was so close and he was so handsome, I just couldn’t hold back. “And you know what? That kiss between us, Jameson? That KISS? It had me asking myself who the hell Trager was. I'm being a total emotion whore with you, telling you everything. And, God, James, that kiss?"
"Confession time," he breathed, trembling. Oh, my good God, the man was trembling.
"Yeah, what's that?" I whispered, hands gripping firmer, wetting my lips with my tongue.
"I'm glad Trager didn't know what he had," he whispered, brushing his nose against mine.
"I'm glad, too."
"Life is chock full of surprises, isn't it?" His lips brushed over the corner of mine. They weren’t touching me—no they were breathing me in, hovering over me, driving me so absolutely insane I had to squeeze my thighs together.
"What are you thinking about now?" I asked. I wanted to know. I had to know.
“You, I find myself always thinking about you.” His lips gently touched down in the corner of mine and my knees weakened. “Did you really care when you saw them together this morning?”
“No,” I sighed without hesitation.
“So what have you decided to do? I find that singles ad on your desk. I haven’t seen anything about a cancelled wedding.”
“It’s five days before my so called wedding. I decided I'm still having it.”
He pressed me up against the wall harder. “I won't let you marry him.”
“Oh, he won't be there. I've decided since I still have to pay for everything, the party will go on and I'm renaming it a The Dress was Perfect, but the Groom Wasn’t party. Then I'm leaving him here and going on my honeymoon all by myself.”
“You’re amazing,” he whispered. Then he tugged me back into the crowded bar and sat me on a bar stool, cupping my face in his hands. “I'm going to your party. I'm going to dance with you. Then, Lex, I'm coming on that honeymoon with you. How long was it for and where?”
“Three weeks, in Jamaica,” I said stunned.
“Three weeks. Three weeks we will lock each other in that honeymoon suite and we play out every one of your fantasies. No rules. Anything you want to try, we try. No feeling ashamed or insecure. Then we come back here and pretend nothing happened. You want to experiment and find yourself. I want to fuck you like I've never wanted to fuck anyone before.”
“Y…you want to be with m…me?” I stammered.
“There isn't one person in this world right now that I want more than you.” He slid in between my thighs and lifted my face to his. “Lex, I’ve been walking around with your panties in my pocket since you tossed them at me. Just the scent of them makes me hard. Tell me your fantasies.”
“F…fantasies?”
“Yeah, like we talked about on the plane. Ever walk down the street, watch people and wonder what they do when they’re alone or with their significant others. What are their preferences, what do they like, get off on, what are their fantasies?” His fingers slid slowly down my cheeks and neck, then slid around and twisted into my hair. He tugged back on the strands, pulling my face up closer to his and a rush of heat shot through the center of my body. “Everyone has fantasies. When someone is inside you, you’re thinking of something, most people never tell though—just like you said. Maybe they’re too embarrassed by it, maybe they think whatever it is people will think it’s wrong, maybe they even think it’s wrong, it’s so hard to be yourself, so hard to understand the thoughts and emotions that are going on inside your mind at those moments of pleasure.” He moved in closer and nipped at the bottom of my chin. “Imagine being with someone that never looks differently at you when you tell them your secrets, imagine feeling so comfortable with someone that you can be true to yourself and your demons. The sex must be mind-blowing. So tell me, Lex, what’s your fantasy?”
“Right now, climbing onto your lap and feeling your tongue in my mouth.” I covered my hands over my face and groaned—mortified about what I’d said.
He peeled my fingers off my face and threaded his fingers in mine. “I want that too.”
“How long have you been thinking of this?” I asked.
“Since a stunning woman sat down across from me in the hallway of a hotel and vomited her life at me while separating the colors of M&Ms.”
Both of us noticed Mandy making her way over toward us with a smile and two huge drinks, one in each hand. I got up and grabbed onto my purse like a life preserver. “I'm terrified, James.”