I didn't know how I would act when I saw him again. Just hours ago, we were professing our love, making plans to run away, our bodies united in a way that I only ever intended to be with my husband. And now, this invisible line had been drawn. A simple ceremony had cut us off from ever having that again. We would have to go back to the way things were.
“Where's the necklace?” Rory asked as he sat beside me, his arm around the back of my chair.
I felt for my neck. “Oh no! I guess I forgot in the pre-wedding hullabaloo. I am so sorry. It was beautiful. Thank you so much.”
“Of course sweetie.” He kissed me on the cheek and I felt nothing. “You look so beautiful today,” he said.
“Thank you, honey. You look handsome. Very handsome.”
Rory sat back, watching the sun descend upon the lake. “Can you believe one day, our kids will swim in that lake? Climb those trees? Play in this grass?”
I shook my head wistfully. “No. To be honest I still feel like one of those kids myself.”
“Ha. Me too.”
The sound of clinking rose above the humming of the crowd. Others joined to boost the signal.
I followed the sound and my heart clenched when I saw Bobby standing, a champagne flute in one hand, a knife in the other. Bobby had been drinking. I could tell just by looking at him. My entire body stiffened thinking of the possibility of him losing it up there, spilling our secrets in a drunken speech. But when he uttered the first words, I knew he brought the Bobby everyone loved. The one that people wanted to hover around, hoping they could get just a sliver of the magic he possessed.
“I've known Lil since I was, I think, six. Maybe seven. She and I sort of have a reputation of getting after it. I think it started when I tried to steal her candy apple at a carnival and she socked me. Hard. And then began a thirteen-plus year war that still rages until this day.
That girl has a savage right hook on her, ladies and gentlemen.”
Bobby paused as the crowd laughed. His tone changed as he looked to the floor, almost uttering the words to himself more than to the rest of us.
“Lil, the girl who was beautiful no matter how hard she tried not to be.
“And if there was anything I knew early on in my life, it was that Rory had eyes for her. He loved her before he even knew what that meant.”
I choked back tears as I recognized the words he said to me the night before. His secret message to me in front of everyone.
“I knew my entire life this day was inevitable.”
Bobby looked up with glassy eyes at Rory.
“Rory, you bastard. You're marrying the most amazing girl I've ever known.”
Bobby's eyes moved to mine next, but as soon as they locked, and he saw my tears, he broke the gaze, looking down to the floor. His Adam’s apple rose and fell as he masterfully braced for the emotional upheaval. He looked at me again with a smile that betrayed the melancholy in his eyes.
“Lil, take care of that man. He's a huge crybaby. And he'll always try to get his way. But he's only a crybaby because he has a huge heart. And people with big hearts sometimes hurt a little more.”
Bobby raised his glass.
“To you both. You two are the luckiest people in the world to have each other. I am truly happy that you two are taking this step together. I am. If there is anyone in the world whose happiness I would want before my own, it's my brother's. And so, today, I am the happiest I have ever been and may ever be. To see the way he looks at you Lil, I know this is his happiest day too.”
He abandoned the sober tone for a more triumphant one.
“So here's to summers at the lake, skinny dipping under the moon until we're 80, little Lightlys running around carefree like we once did, right hooks from Lil, and hugs from my future nephews and nieces.
“You two are going to have an amazing life together. I am so happy for you. I really am.”
Bobby paused for a second.
“I love you,” his voice cracking as he uttered the words.
“To Rory and Lil!” he announced, and everyone took a sip of their champagne.
The glass clanged again as my father took the floor. I watched helplessly out of the corner of my eye as Bobby slipped away from his table, out of the tent, and into the dark of the night.
I wouldn't see him again for seven years.
Summer 1957
“Sorry we're late!” Barbie announced as she scampered over to our table with Stan. “The twins were being impossible. Throwing tantrums before we left them with the nanny.” Her unlit cigarette dangled from her lip in a daring balancing act.
“No worries,” Rory said, standing to greet her and Stan.
Stan was a hulking man, especially for the time. He was about six-foot-four, with a large belly. He had played offensive line in college and his presence was noticed in any room in which he entered.
“Heya Rory, how's it going?” he extended his hand for a shake. “Lilly,” he nodded in my direction.
“Great Stan. I've been working like a mad dog. This hot summer is great for business. How about you?”
Stan, who was a good deal older than Barbie, was the state director for a local insurance agency, and he and Barbie lived with money to spare. Stan leaned back in his chair, leaking an arrogance that he tried to conceal behind a thin layer of decent social skills. “You know, people always need insurance, no matter what the weather.” He winked at Rory.
Rory nudged me. “This guy keeps trying to get me to go work with him.”
I smiled weakly, genuinely uninterested in their small talk.
“I heard your brother came back. Is he some sort of Beatnik?” Stan rudely asked.
“He's not a Beatnik,” I interjected in an annoyed tone.
Rory glanced at me, surprised by my reaction, before looking back at Stan. “No, he's not. He's just the kind of guy who flies by the seat of his pants. He fought in Korea actually, shot right in the shoulder. I don't think Beatniks do that. He's just not the type to sit in an office, I suppose.”
I was happy to hear Rory defend his brother.
“Well,” Stan snatched the now lit cigarette from Barbie, who harrumphed at the theft, “apparently, all broads on our street are gaga over him. They ogle him doing lawn work and the like. Turns out men who put on suits and work all day aren't appealing enough.”
I directed my eyes towards Barbie who didn't return the look, her eyes planted on Stan.
“Do I sense some jealousy?” Barbie teased.
Stan scoffed. “Pssst. I'm just saying what I've heard.”
“Suddenly you have time for neighborhood gossip,” she jabbed, snatching back her cigarette, the ash falling on the white tablecloth in front of them.
“Nah, that's just Bobby. It's been like that as long as I can remember. Something about him. He has to swat off the ladies,” Rory chimed.
“I don't recall you having such a hard time with the girls yourself, Rory,” I added.
“Meh. Yeah, I had girlfriends. But I was always chasing after you it seemed.”
We eased into comfortable conversation as drinks hit the table. I subtly monitored Rory, afraid he might rebound. He had been dry, at least in my presence, since the night he shot at the ceiling. I didn't know what he was doing on his business trips, as he was always a fan of post-work happy hour, but it was nice to be around a Rory whose blood wasn't tainted with copious amounts of alcohol.