“But why go there? That’s being a heathen again. You’re bowing down before idols.”
“But wat for is the wood carving of the Lord Jesus on the Cross in the church but idol? Or Cross itself? Is that na all same an idol?”
“It’s na the same.”
“The Buddha is only symbol of Buddha. I dinna worship idol, laddie. I’m Chinese. Chinese dinna worship idols, only the idea of statue. We Chinese are na stupid. We’re terriflcal clever about these god things. And how for do I know the Lord Jesus, who was barbarian, likes Chinese, heya?”
“Will you na say such things? That’s blasphemy. Wolfgang’s explained the whole Gospel to you these last months. Of course Jesus loves all people the same way.”
“Then why for do the Christian men priests who wear long skirts and dinna have womens say other Christian priests who dress like men and spawn many children are for crazy, heya? Mass’er Mauss says previously there were many wars and many killings. Ayee yah, the longskirt devils burn men and women on fires.” She shook her head firmly. “Better we change right now, Tai-Pan. Let’s be the long-skirt Christian; then if we lose to them we’ll na be burned. Your kind Christians dinna burn people, do they, heya?”
“You dinna just change like that, for that reason. Catholics are wrong. They’ve—”
“I tell you, Tai-Pan. I think we should be longskirt Christians. And I think also, you look after your new Jesus God very careful, and I look after the Jesus God as best I can, and at the same time I watch our proper Chinese gods for us too, very careful.” She had nodded very firmly, then smiled marvelously. “Then whosoever is the strongest god will look after us.”
“You canna do such a thing. There is only one God. One!”
“Prove it,” she had said.
“I canna do that.”
“There, you see. How can mortal man prove God, any god? But I am a Christian like you. But, fortunate, also Chinese, and in these god things better think a little Chinese. Werry wise to keep a werry open mind. Werry. It’s joss for you that I’m Chinese; then also on our behalf I can petition Chinese gods.” She had added hastily, “Who, of course, dinna exist.” She had smiled. “Isn’t that fine?”
“No.”
“Of course, if I had choice—which I dinna, because there is only one God—I’d prefer Chinese god. They dinna want their devoters to slaughter other gods or dead all people who dinna kowtow.” Again she had run on hastily, “But the Christian barbarian God, who is alone and only God, seems to me, as a poor, simple woman, werry blood-thirst and difficult to get along with, but of course I believe in Him. There,” she had finished emphatically.
“There’ nothing.”
“I think your heaven is one hell of strange place, Tai-Pan. Everyone flying around like birds and everyone with beards. Do you make love in heaven?”
“I dinna ken.”
“If we canna make love, I’m na going to your heaven. Oh no, absolutely. True God or no true God. That’d be a werry bad place. I must find out before go there. Yes, indeed. And another thing, Tai-Pan. Wat for should the only true God, who is therefore fantastical clever, say only one wife, heya, which is terrifical stupid? And if you are Christian, wat for are we as husband and wife, when you already got wife? Adulteratiousness, eh? Werry bad. Wat for you break so many of the Ten Commands, heya, yet still werry all right call yourself Christian?”
“Well, May-may, some of us are sinners and weak. The Lord Jesus will forgive us, some of us. He promised to forgive us if we repent.”
“I would na,” she had said, very firmly. “Na if I was the Most One God. No, indeed. And another thing, Tai-Pan. How can God be Trinity yet have number-one Son who is also God who was born of real woman, without help of real man, who then becomes Mother of God? That’s wat I dinna understand. But dinna mistake me, Tai-Pan, I’m Christian as any, by God. Heya?”
They had had many such talks, and each time he had found himself locked into an argument that had no end and no beginning, except that he knew there was only one God, the true God, and knew also that May-may would never understand. He had hoped that perhaps in His time He would make Himself clear to her . . .
“Please, Tai-Pan,” May-may said again. “One little pretend will na harm anything. I said a prayer already to the One God. Dinna forget that we’re in China and it is a Chinese river.”
“But it does nae good at all.”
“I know. Oh yes, Tai-Pan, I know absolutely. But I’m only a two-year Christian, so you and God must be patient with me. He will forgive me,” she ended triumphantly.
“All right,” Struan said.
She went below. When she came back she had washed her face and her hands, and her hair was braided. In her hands was a silver brick wrapped in paper. The paper was covered with Chinese characters.
“Did you write the characters?”
“Yes. I found writing pen and ink. I wrote a prayer to the sea god.”
“What does it say?”
“ ‘Oh Great Wise and Powerful Sea God, in return for this enormous gift which is almost hundred taels of silver, please bring us safe to a barbarian ship called
China Cloud belonging to my barbarian, and thence to the island Hong Kong wat the barbarians have stolen from us.’ ”
“I dinna think much of that prayer,” he said. “After all, lass, it’s my silver, and I dinna like being called a barbarian.”
“It’s a polite prayer, and it tells the truth. It’s a Chinese sea god. To a Chinese you’re barbarian. It’s most important to tell the truth in prayer.” She walked gingerly down the listing side of the ship, and with great difficulty held the heavy, paper-covered silver brick at arm’s length, and closed her eyes and intoned the prayer that she had written. Then, her eyes still closed, she neatly unwrapped the silver brick and let the paper fall into the water and tucked the brick quickly into the folds of her jacket. She opened her eyes and watched the paper being sucked down into the river by the wash of the boat.
She clambered back joyfully, the silver safe in her arms. “There. Now we can rest.”
“That’s a cheat, by God,” Struan said, exploding.
“Wat?”
“You did na drop the silver overboard.”
“Shusssssssssh! Na so loud! You spoil everything!” Then she whispered, “Of course na. Do you think I’m a fool?”
“I thought you wanted to make an offering.”
“I’ve just make it,” she whispered, perplexed. “You dinna think I’d really throw all that silver in the river, do you? God’s blood, am I a lump of dog meat? Am I mad?”
“Then why go through—”
“Shussssssh!” May-may said urgently. “Na so loud! The sea god may hear you.”
“Why pretend to drop the silver overboard? That’s no offering.”
“I swear to God, Tai-Pan, I dinna understand you at all. Wat for do gods need real silver, heya? Wat for should they use real silver? To buy real clothes and real food? Gods are gods and Chinese are Chinese. I’ve made the offering and saved your silver. I swear to God, barbarians are strange people.”
And she went below, muttering to herself in Soochow dialect, “As if I’d destroy so much silver! Am I an empress that I can throw silver away? Ayeee yah,” she said, negotiating the corridor into the hold. “Even the devil empress would not be so foolish!” She put the silver in the bilge where she had found it and went back on deck.