I called her immediately, and when I did, I spent almost an hour with her on the phone. Luckily, Theo had just left to handle some car business, which left her lounging in her dorm room on her twin-sized mattress. I remembered how her dorm looked: pink everywhere. Pink sheets, pink rugs, pink pillows, a pink lamp, even pink magnets to go on her mini fridge. Izzy loved pink just as much as I loved purple.
“But seriously. Are you okay, Iz? I got your pic of the car. That thing is totaled. You’re lucky you made it out alive, girl.”
“I’m fineeee. Trust me. Even though the accident was totally not my fault, they’re trying to pin it on me. That guy hit me!”
“Yeah, but at least you made it out safely. That’s all that matters.”
“You sound like a parent,” she laughed.
“Because I care?”
“Ehh.” She made a pfft noise through the phone, as if she were exasperated. “So, I’m not sure about this whole summer relationship thing anymore. Dylan is starting to get clingy,” Izzy said out of the blue.
“Why do you say that? Because he kisses you and actually cares unlike Marco did?”
She scoffed. “Oh my god, Chloe! Did you really just go there? The Marco card? What a bitch.”
I laughed. “You know it’s true. If a guy doesn’t treat you like shit, you get bored. A terrible thing to want, Iz.”
“Yeah, but even though Marco was a total dick, he made up for it… with his beautifully big dick.” She busted out in a laugh, and someone in the background shouted something. “Oh, bite me, Jessie,” Izzy spat.
“Holy shit! Jessie the Prude is still your roommate?” I was rolling with laughter now. Jessie went to Bradshaw with us. The biggest geek of all. There was nothing wrong with being a geek, but when you’re a geek that snitches and lies… well… it’s simple. You get shunned.
“Yes! And she’s so fucking annoying!”
“Right here!” Jessie shouted in the background.
“Duh, Prude, I see you.” Izzy snickered.
I shook my head. “You are so mean to her.”
“Well, maybe she should find another roommate. She’s lucky I agreed. She’s still a liar. I don’t know why I still put up with her. Why are you even here? Why aren’t you home for the summer with your family or something?!” All of her questions to Jessie were rhetorical, and I was dying on my end, as in laughing my ass off. Izzy groaned. “Let me stop before she snitches on me. Anyway, back to Dylan… I don’t know. He’s always calling and texting, and when he’s around I have, like, no space to fucking breathe. Yesterday morning, I asked him to buy me a donut and an iced latte from Dunkin Donuts, and he bought me a whole dozen. I was grateful, I really was, but then he spent the whole day in my dorm after I specifically told him it was my girl time and I wasn’t up for cuddling. God, Chlo, you know how I get around this time of the month. Bitchin’ it out to the max.”
“Yeah,” I snuffed, “I know. Trust me.”
She sighed. “He just doesn’t get me.”
“Sooo why are you still with him? Why waste your time? His time?”
“Shit, I may get annoyed, but he has something to make me forget his clinginess! That magical mouth of his—now he can munch on pussy like it’s dinner.” This time, my laugh felt like it could shake the walls. Izzy joined in on the laugh as I clutched my sides and then swiped joyful tears from the corners of my eyes. “He does this thing—this circle motion with his tongue. Oh my gosh, Chloe. How could any woman ever get rid of that? An expert pussy eater.” She continued her sniggling. “I love it, I swear. Maybe I’ll get over him being so clingy if you get a boyfriend too. That way, we can both bitch and complain. Then we can do double dates and someone can distract him with sports talk or something when we go out. Yeah, totally do that, Chlo. Find a guy before I finish summer school so we can set up a date!”
“Yeah, I don’t think I’m gonna force a relationship just so your clingy boo can be distracted.”
“Boooooo,” Izzy droned. “Fine. Your loss. How has summer been, though? Besides Papa Knight, is everything else good? Is Bristle Wave still a fucking bore?”
“Bristle is still quite boring, but I can’t complain about the scenery. Dad seems to be doing better—oh, and I didn’t even tell you that Mariah and Tiny came here last week!”
“What!?” she exclaimed.
“Yep. We went for dinner and ice cream first. We were supposed to be on a boat, but Mariah’s dad never rented it out. But later that night we went to Brix, and guess who was there?”
“Who?” she indulged. I knew she was glued to the phone.
“Fucking Riley Hunt… again! He saw me, but I had to pretend Tiny was my date for the night just so he wouldn’t bother me. But the dickwad just turned to Mariah like I wasn’t even there. I swear, boys are just stupid. Tiny got so pissed and was about to pick a fight, but I spared Riley by dragging Tiny’s lanky ass out of there and dragging them to Dane’s.”
“Oh my God! Are you serious?”
“Yes. Tiny was so mad the whole ride. They were wasted, Izzy.”
“Ugh! See! I should be there. I’m so jealous.”
“Please don’t be,” I said. “Trust me, you aren’t missing much. Mariah and Tiny coming here was probably the most fun I’ve had so far.” And Theo, the voice in the back of my mind whispered.
Izzy groaned. “Well, keep being bored until I can come home. Hopefully I can get a chance over the weekend. If I could leave now, I would, but some of my classes are on stupid campus.”
“I know. I understand. I’m fine, Iz. You just worry about school. Bristle will always be here.”
“I know. It’s just so fucking boring on campus when no one is here. I have no choice but to focus.” She laughed and then sighed as if all her stress had faded. “Man, I needed this talk. I swear you are my cure for a shitty, shitty day.”
“Aww,” I cooed, teasing her. “Don’t be so melodramatic.”
“Dude, I’m not. I’m serious. Other than my dad, you are the only person I can really trust and talk to about anything. You know me. I hate people sometimes, but I have never come close to hating you.”
My smile dropped, as well as my beating heart. She said this, but little did she know that we both were breaking that trust day by day. I wanted to cry, get rid of the ball of pain building up around my heart. God, I just wanted to tell her, but I didn’t want her to hate me. I didn’t want her to change—us to change. I didn’t want to lose my best friend. I refused.
Fuck, I was selfish. So very selfish.
“I love you, Chlo. Fa’sho.”
I laughed, but the line of my eyes burned, thick with unshed tears. “That is still the corniest line I’ve ever heard.”
Her giggle was comforting. “Whatever! I still think it’s cool. And it fits. Now say it back before you break my heart!”
With a steady voice, a gentle smile, and a tear I knew she couldn’t see trailing down my cheek, I finished our little rhyme, ignoring the thickness in my throat. “I love you too, Izzy Boo.”
“See!” she busted out in a laugh just as I did, swiping my face. “Now, that’s corny.”
God, I loved these chats with her. The mindless, careless conversations I could share with her about any and everything. I missed the hell out of my friend, and it was still hard to wrap my head around the fact that I was holding one of the biggest secrets of my life from her.
After saying goodbye, I hung up. My head lifted, and I looked towards the collage of us pinned to my bulletin board. The photo of us on prom night was my favorite. We were flawless, and we didn’t need dates because we were our own dates.
All the girls at Bradshaw envied us, our friendship most of all. They treated us like Regina and Caydee from Mean Girls, only we weren’t mean and our friendship wasn’t fake… and we didn’t only wear pink on Wednesdays, especially Izzy. Everyone adored and hated us at the same time. They wanted to be us, which was weird because we sometimes didn’t like being us.
Like now. I wished I wasn’t myself. I wished I hadn’t become so close to Izzy’s father. I wished he was someone else—someone I could actually be with without the fear of losing someone else close and dear to my heart.