"Can I come in?" I said, and Mira nodded, saying that of course I could. She led the way to her living room.
"Anything to drink?" she asked.
I shook my head. "Not just yet. Maybe in a little while. I have some news, but first I want some answers."
"To what questions?"
"Just one, really: Was Esther sleeping with Inspector John Clapper because she was an Irgun agent?"
Mira's mouth dropped open. She drew in and blew out a deep breath and sank onto the sofa, putting her head in her hands. I sat beside her.
"It's true, isn't it?"
Mira slid her hands off her face and nodded slowly. "How did you find out?"
I told her about Strauss and how he had threatened to expose Esther's affair with Clapper if she wouldn't sleep with him. I did not tell her where Strauss had learned about the affair—I wished to spare Leah Goldin Mira's wrath and retribution. I explained that the idea of Esther becoming the lover of a British officer, in particular one who was in charge of preventing Jewish immigration to the Land of Israel, struck me as improbable in the extreme. The only way it made sense was if Esther was working for the Irgun. I finished by relating to her the events of the previous night: how I had managed to overpower the man Strauss had sent to kill me, the same man who had murdered Esther and Willie.
"He tried to deny it by feeding me some cockamamie story, but it was clearly all lies. He killed them. Strauss had arranged for an alibi the night of the murders—not that he ever needed it."
Mira listened to me without speaking, all the while wearing an expression of such unadulterated pain that it was a struggle not to look away from her. When I was done, a single tear broke free from each of her eyes and ran in parallel lines down her cheeks.
"It's my fault," she said in a bleak voice. Her eyes were wet, shining like the flat surface of a lake on a blindingly sunny day.
"No," I said.
She wiped her cheeks with her hands. "It is. She wouldn't have died if not for me. I should have never allowed her to become Clapper's lover. I was her handler."
"Her handler?"
"I was the one she reported to, the one she gave information to."
"Information from Clapper?"
"Yes. Pillow talk, mostly. The man couldn't keep his mouth shut around Esther. He liked to paint himself as large as possible, to impress her. She encouraged him of course. She knew how to get him to run off at the mouth."
"Whose idea was it? For Esther to do what she did?"
"Hers. Esther's."
"No one pushed her into it?"
"No one. In fact, I tried to talk her out of it. I found the whole notion distasteful. I told her there were other ways she could be of service to the Irgun. But Esther was adamant. She said she could do more good by getting intimate with Clapper than by being just another run-of-the-mill Irgun member. She convinced me, and she was right. The information she got for us was priceless."
"Why did you choose Clapper?"
"For a number of reasons. One, his wife had remained in England, so he was here without a woman. Two, his position and role in the CID made him a prime target. In more ways than one, actually. The bastard's lucky to be alive."
"Why do you say that?"
"Because Clapper was marked for assassination by the heads of the Irgun. He was very effective in stopping our ships and was seen as a major threat to continued Jewish immigration to the Land of Israel. The reason why no attempt was made on his life was due to the extraordinary precautions he took. He rarely ventured out in public, kept odd hours, switched vehicles frequently, and changed his routine often. It was difficult to formulate an assassination plan that was likely to succeed. When Esther became his lover, Clapper became more valuable alive than dead and the order to have him killed was rescinded. Michael was furious."
"Why?"
"Because he had been given the task of eliminating Clapper. He did not like it when he was ordered to desist. He viewed it as a personal failure. You see, Michael did not know Clapper had been compromised."
"Compromised by Esther," I said.
Mira nodded. "Exactly. Only I knew of her actions, and only one higher-up in the Irgun knew that I had an agent close to Clapper. It had to be that way for security reasons. The more people knew, the greater chance there was of Esther being uncovered as a spy."
"Wasn't she taking an exceptional risk, being so close to a high-ranking British officer?"
"I explained the risks to her. She accepted them. Esther was very brave. Very dedicated. I remember her telling me that this wasn't a choice she was making. She felt compelled to do whatever she could to help other Jews get into our homeland."
Mira ran her hands through her hair, then clasped them tightly in her lap. She shook her head mournfully. "I knew she faced a risk of being exposed by the British. I never imagined that what she was doing might be used against her by a Jew."
"I understand that Jewish girls who went with British officers faced a severe backlash from other Jews."
"That's true. They suffered socially, but none was ever killed for it. I discussed the social risks with Esther. It didn't affect her resolve. She was willing to risk not just her freedom, not just her life, but also being hated by her own people."
"Why didn't you tell me about Esther and Clapper?"
"Two reasons. The first is I didn't want you to think badly of Esther, and of me. It's a dirty business, a woman sleeping with the enemy to get information. But you don't see it that way, do you, Adam?"
"No."
Mira had her eyes latched firmly on mine. It felt as if she was peering into the deepest recesses of my mind. "No," she said softly. "I can see that you really don't. The second reason why I kept this whole business secret from you is that I didn't think it was relevant. How could it be? No one but me knew what Esther was doing." She shook her head. "I can see now how foolish that was. Why do you think Esther didn't tell me about Strauss? I would have helped her."
I hesitated. I did not want to hurt Mira, but she would guess the reason sooner or later. "Maybe she feared you would tell her she must end her affair with Clapper, and she wasn't willing to do that."
Pain crossed Mira's face. Her eyes welled, but she shed no more tears. She nibbled on her lower lip. "So it was my fault. I never should have let her go through with this whole crazy, sordid scheme."
"From what you told me, Esther would have gone through with it with your permission or without it."
Mira let out a sigh. "I suppose you're right. When Esther set her mind on something, she would let nothing dissuade her. I wish you'd met her, Adam."
"I wish I did, too," I said. "She was a true hero."
Mira nodded. "The information Esther provided helped us smuggle in hundreds upon hundreds of Jews. If not for her, those Jews might have been stuck in Europe and would have been murdered by the Nazis. Do you know what pains me almost as much as her death? The fact that Esther should be celebrated throughout Israel, but she won't be. Knowing what she did to get information would make people uneasy. They would not want their daughters to have such a role model. They would not want their sons to have lewd thoughts about the beautiful Jewish girl in the bed of the British officer. Esther will not be celebrated. Her heroic sacrifice will remain unknown. She will be forgotten."
I looked at Mira and could see the guilt etched on her face. "Mira, you mustn't blame yourself. None of this is your fault."
She nodded a few times, and I knew I hadn't convinced her. Guilt was like that. It was not susceptible to reason.
Mira's face suddenly hardened. "It's good that you killed the murderer," she said. "I wish I had done it. I will take care of Strauss."