With great difficulty, Lisa managed to save some money from her modest salary to buy herself a cheap small laptop so she could use the internet and write messages to her girlfriends. With great interest,they asked her about her life, and on the other hand, Lisa got news from her quiet hometown. She learned, for example, that some of her friends had gotten married in the summer after college graduation and four of them had already had children. Many were given a very good career turn. Lisa was a little jealous of her class and university students with family and career developments when she was much further behind.
Lisa was lonely, but in her free hours,she could do what she wanted. She loved this freedom. She was free of the studies, the parents, a number of duties. Sometimes she felt really happy.
Most of all, Lisa loved to explore the vast and mysterious city. A ticket there and back cost a lot,and Lisa could not often afford it..
Once she was driving for half a day, visiting half the city. Lisa found enjoyment in exploring the vast and mysterious city. The family wouldn't pay for a monthly ticket, although they said they would in the questionnaire. However, a bike was enough to get to the most important places. Lisa was grateful to have a free method of travelling. She took off on the bike to explore. The cultural diversity fascinated her more and more each day.
- she was on the bicycle for more than half the day. Close to the house of her host family, there was a multistory shopping center with all kinds of shops. There was something for everyone‘s taste and budget. Lisa went inside and found herself in a world of brightly lit window displays. There were perfume scents in the air, some from shops and others from patrons. There were many clothing displays with beautiful fabrics and styles. Lisa felt like a princess walking through the shopping center. The bright colors and sweet scents were enough to make her head spin. She would walk between the rows, looking at the goods on display. The gentle music that played over the stereo was a welcomed background noise. She tried on some of the clothes, even though she had no intention of buying anything. She had a miserable salary and could hardly afford her basic needs as it was.
She was window shopping, which felt more like exploring a museum. She saw many wonderful things, but was never able to take those things home with her. She had to save her money carefully. Each trip into city had to be planned for. All her personal needs were paid for out of her own pocket. She didn't make enough money to indulge in shopping. Sometimes, she indulged in the simple pleasures of a chocolate bar. She would sit down on a bench within the mall and watch. People would stroll by, music would change. She was watching life happening all around her.
25
After Lisa freed herself from her first host family, she was grateful. She did everything she could for her second host family. She wanted to be a good au pair. While Ben was in kindergarten, Lisa would iron and prepare lessons. She did the simple chores she was asked to do.
In the first two months, she noticed that her host parents only ate bread after work. She never saw them eat any real food. This gave her the idea to cook a nice meal for them. She started with a casserole. Then, she could try cooking asparagus. Or she would bake a nice cake. It wasn't expensive to cook for this small family. It was only a few dollars to prepare a nice casserole with potatoes and meat. Then, she would add a nice pastry for dessert as a treat for the family. It was her way of saying thank you. The host father always complimented Lisa's cooking. He would say such wonderful things.
"We are so lucky to have you as our au pair."
"Our au pair is intelligent, has beautiful eyes and can cook so well!"
Lisa always thanked him when he gave her compliments. She wasn't used to receiving any praise for the work she did. Her last family never thanked her for anything. The host father would often tell Ben that he was lucky to have such a good au pair as well.
Unfortunately, these compliments started to make the host mother feel jealous.
"Lisa, please don't cook anymore. Our family tradition is eating only bread for dinner," she announced.
"Okay," Lisa agreed, without questioning it further.
"We don't want to get fat, Lisa. We want to be skinny and beautiful, just the way we are." Angelica continued. Lisa didn't fully understand why Angelica was so worried about getting fat. She was beautiful. But, Lisa also did not question her decision. One day, Angelica told her that she herself would cook a traditional family dish. Lisa asked if she could help.
"Of course not, Lisa. It's a traditional dish. That means only I am able to cook it," Angelica explained. The traditional dish that Angelica was planning to prepare wasn't a dish at all. It was a ready-to-go packaged meal. Lisa watched as Angelia put it in the microwave for 10 minutes and served it to her family. Her husband was thrilled.
"Look, my wife is the best cook on the planet," he boasted. Lisa thought to herself that she would have easily been able to prepare this dish. In fact, she could have made the meal without using a ready-to-go dish.
One day, she asked what she might be able to cook for dinner. Her host father answered contemptuously, "All you think about is food, Lisa." Lisa noticed that the host family was always stressed. Her host father was often stressed after work and had to listen to his wife nagging at him. Either way, Lisa was no longer able to cook. She had to become accustomed to the traditions of this host family. It was cereal for breakfast and bread for dinner.
25
The first three months within the new host family seemed like a century, and not a golden one. Lisa had barely gotten used to the new rules and obligations. The fear that she could not handle everything tortured her more than her physical sufferings, although they were not easy to endure either.
During January, February and part of March—first because of the deep snow, and then because of the spring thaw—Lisa’s walks were limited to the garden. The only exception was a trip to the kindergarten, but she needed to spend an hour in the garden every day to breathe fresh air. Her thin clothing did not protect her from the harsh cold, and she did not have proper shoes. Snow stuffed into her shoes and melted there. Lisa‘sswollen feet were unbearable in the evening. In the morning, it was the torture to thrusting them, scarred and numb, into her shoes. She had a growing sense of despair,and there was still an extreme scarcity of food. Lisa had the healthy appetite of a growing child, and she got hardly enough to support the life of a sick patient, breathing his last. How many times had Lisa received a single precious piece of brown bread for dinner? Lisa ate it all hiding secret tears, left with excruciating hunger.