It was the beginning of the month and she hadn't received her salary yet. She had nothing left over from the previous month either. She had to spend all of her money on the laptop she bought herself.
Her happy host family packed their stuff in their car, winking her.” Bye, Lisa. Take care of our house. Keep it clean and safe and don’t have any parties,” they instructed her from the car.
“Okay. Bye. Have a nice trip,” Lisa answered.
It had been a devastating week, and Lisa was happy finally to have some time for herself. Usually the host family left money for her when they were going away. It was usually twenty dollars, which was enough for Lisa to eat. With twenty dollars, she could make a nice meal for the whole family. Or a nice dessert. It was more than enough for her to eat for a couple of days.
That evening Lisa was very hungry and she decided to go to supermarket to buy her something to eat. She opened the locker, where her host family usually put money for Lisa, so that she could buy food or some household stuff, pay fees for Ben or buy some sweets for him.
This time, there were only 30 cents.
That was all she had for three days.
She was overwhelmed when she saw the small amount of money that had been left for her.
She had to sit down. For almost an entire hour, she sat there and looked out the window. Is that all she deserved? A lousy thirty cents. She had given up her entire life to make this family happy and all they left her was thirty cents. She wondered if that was her value to this family. Did they believe she was only worth thirty cents?
Only some days ago Angelica gave her compliments for being such a great au pair. They smiled at her and told her she was a member of the family. They were filled with compliments whenever they needed her help. Lisa felt like babysitting was less of a job and more just being a part of the family.
“Lisa, Ben is like your little brother. It is not even a job. You have fun and get paid for it,” they said.
But whenever they went out on a trip, or to a fancy restaurant, they discarded Lisa and made her feel invisible to the family.
How fake and hypocritical her host family was, Lisa thought. They use me whenever they need me, and they are absolutely not interested in me. How stupid was I when I trusted them?
Lisa wanted to cry, to run, to escape the reality at that moment. She felt used, abused, betrayed, lied to.
Powerful emotions creeped into her veins, a string pulled at her soul and her mind was shattered into pieces. Thrown to the wolves and pulled away from what she once believed, everything had changed, for better or for worse. Lisa changed and she faced the truth. Ultimate devastation and pain were to follow.
There was some granola left for Lisa to eat. There was also a one muffin left from the batch. She had made muffins with Ben the day before, which the host family took with them. They had been full of praise for Ben, expressing how impressed they were that he managed to make muffins. But Lisa was afraid to eat the muffin that had been left behind, because it was bigger than two chips.
While her host family was having a glamorous vacation in a spa hotel, they certainly had no interest in how Lisa was expected to survive three days on a mere thirty cents.
That evening, Lisa secretly cooked tortillas consisting of water and flour for lunch for herself, and then she bought some cheaper chocolates or cookies and thus survived. Lisa had to get accustomed to the food traditions of this manager family. Usually, it was granola and an apple, which was cut into twenty pieces for the whole family for breakfast and some bread for dinner.
The evening she was home alone in the mansion, her thoughts swirled around in her head. She wanted to communicate with someone, that was why she bought the laptop. After a long day, she headed to her room. She dropped down on her bed and picked up her laptop. She went back onto the pen-pal website and found herself a few new pen pals. But, she didn't feel social today. She checked her emails, but there was nothing important. Then, she decided to go to Facebook. She was clicking around aimlessly when she saw a flashing banner.
It said: “Do you Want 2 Find International Pen Pals? Click Here.” Lisa clicked the ad.
As soon as the ad was loaded, she was looking at images. People were laughing and having a good time. Lisa clicked through the registration to sign up for the website. She wanted to find a pen pal. It was better than nothing. She needed someone to talk to, who would listen to what she had to say. She needed fresh air. She needed a sense of freedom. She needed an escape from the life she found herself stuck in.
She didn't have any pictures to put on her profile. But she figured that signing up was a good start. She hoped she would be able to meet someone to chat with. The host parents were rarely home in the evenings, so she found herself bored and restless quite often. It would be nice to share stories or talk nonsense with someone. She also wanted to improve her language skills. She wanted to engage in any conversation that would help her learn the local language. Her host family wouldn't pay for any expensive language courses. They rarely spoke to her, outside of giving her instructions. When she did speak, she was usually met with disapproval. So, she stopped trying to make conversation. Lisa spent the entire day doing household chores. Even with the family gone, there was still a list of tasks she had to complete.
She needed fresh air. She needed freedom. And even though Lisa had no pictures on her profile, it was a good start to register in the first place.
On her page she had no pictures, but to her surprise, she soon received an unexpected message from a stranger:
From: Alexander X
To: Lisa
Subject: :)
Hello Lisa,
Here, on the other side of the city, sits one cute young man who would not mind being your pen pal.
I just sent you my picture and I await your answer.
Greetings,
Alexander
The attached photo showed a man, at some ski resort near snowy mountains, in a dark blue ski suit and long skis in his hand with a mysterious smile on his face, which was slightly noticeable even from far away.
Lisa sent him a modest response with a little black-and-white photo.
From: Lisa
To: Alexander
Subject: :)
Hello Alexander,
Well, I'm an au pair. My host family is very nice. I graduated as an English teacher.
My hobbies are playing the piano, traveling, etc.
What are your hobbies?
Wishing you a nice weekend!
Kind regards,
Lisa
The surreal world of the internet is famous for its magic of uniting ordinary people. That was how their correspondence started. Two people, two strangers, lonely people sitting near their desktops on different sides of the city, trying to escape the loneliness there.
28
The next morning, Lisa got up and dressed. Physically she felt weak and broken, but worse was her mental depression. It made her cry all the time, quietly. She did not have a chance to erase from her cheek one salty drop as it slid immediately after the other. But she thought, she should feel happy. Her host parents were not at home. Since she was accustomed to constant reprimands and the need to serve without receiving a word of gratitude, it should have felt like she was in a heaven of peace and quiet. But her tortured nerves had reached the point where the quiet serenity could not calm them down, and no pleasure would cause excitement.
Nervous tension escalated. Lisa went out into the street, which was teeming with people, and felt like she was in a whole new atmosphere. People were walking on the sidewalks. The huge shopping area seemed to be so vast = and callous. Stiff in its indifference to the people, it seemed to her that all the doors were closed. The struggle was too severe, and there was no hope that she would achieve something there. Past the endless procession of men and women in a hurry, Lisa felt a mighty pulse of life with its variety of interests, and felt helpless, realizing that in this thread she was only a tiny straw. In vain, she looked around for where to turn, but could not find the door that she had dared to enter.