“Tommy, tell me!” I said. “How bad could it be?”
“Not bad so much as strange. Maybe even unbelievable for you, Meg.” I frowned, but he went on. “The ironic thing is, the thing they can’t stand about Tristan is something they gave him. A curse, you would have called it years ago. Today I think the word we use is gene. In any case, it runs in Tristan’s family, skipping generations mostly, but every once in a while one of the boys are born. well, different.”
“Different but not in the gay way?” I said, confused.
“No, not in the gay way,” said Tommy, smiling, shaking his head. “Different in the way that he has two lives, sort of. The one here on land with you and me, and another one in, well, in the water.”
“He’s a rebellious swimmer?”
Tommy laughed, bursting the air. “I guess you could say that,” he said. “But no. Listen, if you want to know, I’ll tell you, but you have to promise not to tell Mom and Dad. They think we’re here because Tristan’s family disowned him for being gay. I told them his parents were Pentecostal, so it all works out in their minds.”
“Okay,” I said. “I promise.”
“What would you say,” Tommy began, his eyes shifting up, as if he were searching for the right words in the air above him, “what would you say, Meg, if I told you the real reason is because Tristan’s not completely human. I mean, not in the sense that we understand it.”
I narrowed my eyes, pursed my lips, and said, “Tommy, are you on drugs?”
“I wish!” he said. “God, those’ll be harder to find around here.” He laughed. “No, really, I’m telling the truth. Tristan is something. something else. A water person? You know, with a tail and all?” Tommy flapped his hand in the air when he said this. I smirked, waiting for the punch line. But when one didn’t come, it hit me.
“This has something to do with The Sons of Melusine, doesn’t it?”
Tommy nodded. “Yes, those paintings are inspired by Tristan.”
“But, Tommy,” I said, “why are you going back to this type of painting? Sure it’s an interesting gimmick, saying your boyfriend’s a merman. But the critics didn’t like your fantasy paintings. They liked the American Gothic stuff. Why would they change their minds now?”
“Two things,” Tommy said, frustrated with me. “One: a good critic doesn’t dismiss entire genres. They look at technique and the composition of elements and the relationship the painting establishes with this world. Two: it’s not a gimmick. It’s the truth, Meg. Listen to me. I’m not laughing anymore. Tristan made his parents an offer. He said he’d move somewhere unimportant and out of the way, and they could make up whatever stories they wanted about him for their friends, to explain his absence, if they gave him part of his inheritance now. They accepted. It’s why we’re here.”
I didn’t know what to say, so I just stood there. Tommy ladled soup into bowls for the four of us. Dad would be coming in from the barn soon, Tristan back from the pond. Mom was still at the library and wouldn’t be home till evening. This was a regular summer day. It made me feel safe, that regularity. I didn’t want it to ever go away.
I saw Tristan then, trotting through the field out back, drying his hair with his pink shirt as he came. When I turned back to Tommy, he was looking out the window over the sink, watching Tristan too, his eyes watering. “You really love him, don’t you?” I said.
Tommy nodded, wiping his tears away with the backs of his hands. “I do,” he said. “He’s so special, like something I used to see a long time ago. Something I forgot how to see for a while.”
“Have you finished The Sons of Melusine series then?” I asked, trying to change the subject. I didn’t feel sure of how to talk to Tommy right then.
“I haven’t,” said Tommy. “There’s one more I want to do. I was waiting for the right setting. Now we have it.”
“What do you mean?”
“I want to paint Tristan by the pond.”
“Why the pond?”
“Because,” said Tommy, returning to gaze out the window, “it’s going to be a place where he can be himself totally now. He’s never had that before.”
“When will you paint him?”
“Soon,” said Tommy. “But I’m going to have to ask you and Mom and Dad a favor.”
“What?”
“Not to come down to the pond while we’re working.”
“Why?”
“He doesn’t want anyone to know about him. I haven’t told Mom and Dad. Just you. So you have to promise me two things. Don’t come down to the pond, and don’t tell Tristan I told you about him.”
Tristan opened the back door then. He had his shirt back on and his hair was almost dry. Pearls of water still clung to his legs. I couldn’t imagine those being a tail, his feet a flipper. Surely Tommy had gone insane. “Am I late for lunch?” Tristan asked, smiling at me.
Tommy turned and beamed him a smile back. “Right on time, love,” he said, and I knew our conversation had come to an end.
I went down the lane to the barn where Dad was working, taking his lunch with me, when he didn’t show up to eat with us. God, I wished I could tell him how weird Tommy was being, but I’d promised not to say anything, and even if my brother was going crazy, I wouldn’t go back on my word. I found Dad coming out of the barn with a pitchfork of cow manure, which he threw onto the spreader parked outside the barn. He’d take that to the back field and spread it later probably, and then I’d have to watch where I stepped for a week whenever I cut through the field to go to the pond. When I gave him his soup and sandwich, he thanked me and asked what the boys were doing. I told him they were sitting in the living room under the American Gothic portrait fiercely making out. He almost spit out his sandwich, he laughed so hard. I like making my dad laugh, because he doesn’t do it nearly enough. Mom’s too nice, which sometimes is what kills a sense of humor in people, and Tommy was always testing Dad too much to ever get to a joking relationship with him. Me, though, I can always figure out something to shock him into a laugh.
“You’re bad, Meg,” he said, after settling down. Then, “Were they really?”
I shook my head. “Nope. You were right the first time, Dad. That was a joke.” I didn’t want to tell him his son had gone mad, though.
“Well I thought so, but still,” he said, taking a bite of his sandwich. “All sorts of new things to get used to these days.”
I nodded. “Are you okay with that?” I asked.
“Can’t not be,” he said. “Not an option.”
“Who says?”
“I need no authority figure on that,” said Dad. “You have a child, and no matter what, you love them. That’s just how it is.”
“That’s not how it is for everyone, Dad.”
“Well thank the dear Lord I’m not everyone,” he said. “Why would you want to live like that, with all those conditions on love?”
I didn’t know what to say. He’d shocked me into silence the way I could always shock him into laughter. We had that effect on each other, like yin and yang. My dad’s a good guy, likes the simpler life, seems pretty normal. He wears Allis Chalmers tractor hats and flannel shirts and jeans. He likes oatmeal and meat loaf and macaroni and cheese. Then he opens his mouth and turns into the Buddha. I swear to God, he’ll do it when you’re least expecting it. I don’t know sometimes whether he’s like me and Tommy, hiding something different about himself, but just has all these years of experience to make himself blend in. Like maybe he’s an angel beneath that sun-browned, beginning-to-wrinkle human skin. “Do you really feel that way?” I asked. “It’s one thing to say that, but is it that easy to truly feel that way?”